Closed The Day Before It Begins (Delani)

[Abase]

The noon sun shown high over head, beating down on those who walked the wood of the docks amid the vessels of various sizes. The sounds of ocean birds calling and men shouting filled the air. Large crates bearing all manner of goods rose and fell, pulled by large rigs and many ropes.

Irist walked among his brothers, nodding in respect to each as he past, though inside he was a darker storm of ill content. Each step he took reminded the Akontak of where he was going, and precisely what he was leaving behind. A home, a people, a life that could have been. Irist could have been happy here, among his brothers, among his people and his city. This WAS home, but his idiotic brother seemed intent on driving them far far from it.

Shaking his head Irist ran a hand through his silver hair, looking up at the blue sky as he cursed in his native tongue, "Petch. Forced to leave THIS for who knows what danger in some unknown land. We might never return, but Abase doesn't care. Why can't he be content to live here among our people. There is plenty of purpose to be had here."

In the darkness of their shared mind Irist could feel Abase listening to him, knew he heard every word that Irist spoke. It was what he had intended of course, but his Light Brother's silence was infuriating.

Fine. Be silent if you wish brother, but know that I despise this foolish venture you are dragging me on. Why can you not be content with what you have? Why can you not be HAPPY simply living?

From the darkness a simple, and short answer blossomed over the expanse of silence, Because there has to be more.

Irist cursed allowed, annoyance written across his features as he turned to head off of the wooden planks and onto solid ground, "In your selfishness you will strip us of everything, and then brother there will certainly be NO more to this life of ours."

[Delani Denusk]

Dela had not expected to see the Akontak here at the docks that afternoon. But then, why shouldn't she? The other expeditioners should be likewise busy gathering things, reporting to the shipmaster that would see to the acquisition of their things. Even she had been doing such, having just finished speaking with the man after visiting Lacerta and looking into the Sisters and the Ethaefal's own vessel.

Her head turning to follow the emerald-skinned man, she finished speaking with the shipmaster, apologizing as she departed, and following the man. She had seen the sour look upon his face as he passed unaware of her and heard the last bit as he passed, a frown creasing her features briefly before Dela hurried to catch up. Abase are you well?" She called, unaware that it was Irist in control at present. "You seem upset." His greater size made keeping up a little more difficult for the shorter woman, but she did well enough.

The sounds of the docks and workers around them were enough to drown out exterior conversations as she finally caught up enough to reach and touch the mans elbow lightly with her right hand. "Wait a moment, Abase, peace. What upsets you so? Perhaps I can help."

[Abase]

Irist flinched and pulled back at the sudden touch, whipping around to glare down at its source, "Watch where going!" he snarled, before recognizing the woman before him.

Irist's expression softened, but only slightly, and the annoyance in his eyes only seemed to increase. Turning to fully face Delani Irist, look down on her from his full height, crossing his arms over his chest, "Oh, is little Drykas woman. You come speak nonsense again?" Irist frowned, "Because we no need more of foolish talk of travel from woman who have no real home."

Irist! Abase snapped, What your tongue! This is a good woman, strong and brave like her people. Show her the respect she deserves. Apologize!"

Instead Irist spit at Delani's feet, grinding his heel into the dust as he looked into Delani's eyes, "Don't call me weak brother's name. Insult to me, woman, and I no like be insulted." Irist grunted, closing his eyes a moment as Abase whispered further bereavements in his ear. Shaking his head he looked at Delani once more, "He say be nice to horse girl, but I nice to only those who earn respect. You no have respect of Djasirist, and no have his friendship either."

Irist scowled at Delani, as if daring her to speak, just as Abase did the same to Irist.

[Delani Denusk]

The astonishment on her face at the mans reaction and words could have raised the dead. Her brows had raised, her mouth hung open and breath hung frozen in her lungs. Did he seriously just say that?! This was definitely not the man she had conversed with the previous night during the party, not by far! This man was sour and rude and very insulting. Her first instinct was to snap back at him in defense of herself, but that was the rash way of doing things, the unprepared way.

Clicking closed her mouth, Dela sucked a breath in to help bring clarity to her mind before she spoke. And with utmost care at that.

"No, you are clearly not Kasaiabase, for he is more courteous of tongue than that which comes from your mouth." The woman gave him a head-to-toe look and crossed her arms before her. "Dark brother indeed to claim respect must be earned whilst assumptions and disrespectful dictations are thrown so slanderously about. I'll apologize for my mistake that you were your brother, and would ask the same from you for such venom befitting a Symnestra as to think I have no home." Her eyes were fierce this time, her tone not demanding but neither was it negotiable.

"Tell me, Djasirist, how would you feel if I were to mark you as nothing but a halfbreed mutt, neither mighty as the Akalak, nor enchanting as the Konti. No beauty melded into a singular form, a union of body and mind. Just a scaly green boy with a bad attitude whose father would be ashamed to know." It was not a challenge in the jade eyes that shown up to the man before her, only neutral comparison as Delani sought to maintain her own control and not throw something at the tactless, foul-mouthed fool that had to be Abase's brother.

"That would be an insult akin to which you show me. I am here for knowledge, Akontak; not war."

[Abase]

Irist gritted his teeth as he felt a vein throb and frustration build. He wanted nothing more than to pick up this woman like a child and shake her until she begged for mercy, but his Light Brother knew well what he wanted and would never allow it.

Her words bite deep, but she is right my brother. You speak foolish things, hurtful things when anger grips you. Have you not learned yet to control your emotions? Are you still a child?

Be silent brother. This is of no concern of yours. This woman is poisoning your mind. She is a foolish human girl who does not understand our way of life.

*****

The darkness of their world parted, and from the shadows stepped a tiger purest white with eyes blue as sapphires. Abase tilted his head, baring his fangs and growled, And what life is that dear brother? A life content to sit and watch as the world passes us by? To mate with women to propagate a dying species? Mother would be disappointed in your weak spirit.

Cutting through the rays of light, a dark form stepped forward, a tiger black as night with eyes red as freshly spilled blood, What life? It is a GOOD life Abase. It is a life worth living. We would have a home, a people, a wife if we so chose. We could prosper, we could LIVE HERE. But what have we out there? What purpose have we to venture forth on another man's quest? Why has HE earned our lives and why not ME!?

The bitterness in those words gave Abase pause. He had not given thought to what his brother might think, might feel of leaving Riverfall to who knows where. Settling back on his haunches, Abase turned his head to the side, staring off into the distance in thought, I had never known you to feel so strongly. It was never my intention to drive you to this point brother, but still... I cannot give up on this quest.

Because you are not content to live a life that does not hold glory or magic. You are not content with the simple pleasures of this world. Irist growled through bared teeth, fur on end.

Abase looked back at his brother, his mind troubled, That is not it at all brother. No not at all... I... Abase sighed, It is not as you say, for there is a reason I feel as I do... Perhaps Delani would be best to speak with you. Maybe an opinion from one not I would sway you more.

I will hear nothing from this woman whose words cut deeper than my own blade. She is a fool caught up in her own assumptions.

Abase turned, walking back into the darkness even as Irist turned to walk into the light, I think you will be surprised, if you take the time to listen to her words.

*****

Irist blinked, glaring down at Delani after a short few moments during which the inward debate had captured his attention. Shuffling his feet the Akontak rested his hands on his hips, looking the woman up and down, "You speak strong though body weak. And you still fool. Abase hear words. You call HIM halfbreed mutt even as you call me. We share body, and fate, so when insult blood you hurt him as well." He chewed his tongue a moment in thought, "You wish insult me, first you know me. Otherwise you insult Abase more than I. He care more for words than should."

His frown deepened, the glare fading slightly as he turned his head to look away, "I... Apology for what say. Were words childish, speaking before thought." It sounded as if each word pained him. Irist was not used to apologizing to anyone, let alone a woman he did not really know, "Will mind tongue better in future."

[Delani Denusk]

Long moments passed in silence, the drykas staring in disapproval at the man that was not Abase at this time. The birds of the afternoon called during this time and a warm wind tugged at the fanciful braid atop her head minimally. It brought with it the smell of the sea and the reminder of the change that was coming tomorrow morning.

And then, the silence ended and Irist was speaking once again. Her eyes tightened again as he condescended her still, lips pursing in disapproval. Not but a child, a stupid child. "Do NOT twist my words, Irist." She replied foremost. "I am an observer, an investigator by nature, and your behavior, not Abase's, is what I judged. Behave as an adult and perhaps I will honor you more appropriately than a brat who does not understand." Slowly, the woman released a breath, closing her eyes and saying a prayer for patience.

"I accept your apology, Irist, and offer one of my own. I will not pretend to know why your attitude is different from your brothers, my understanding of Akalak does not extend so far. However, you must remember that we must all work together if we are to survive this trip. So please, have patience. It will take more than strength of body for any of this to succeed."

[Abase]

Irist's expression darkened, cold fury filling his features as he growled, "I no care for YOUR quest. I no care if succeed. I no care for any of this." It was like something had finally snapped in Irist, some unseen weight had grown too heavy and now it was coming crashing down, "Is no what I want. Is NEVER what I want. I no have say, I no have choice, but still I go. I go because Abase say we go."

Bitterness began to leak into Irist's voice, "I no want leave home of Father's people. I no want go to place I not know, to fight for cause I no believe it." he waved a hand in a broad gesture, looking at Delani, "We travel all of Mizahar. We go to highest peak. We go to deepest valley. We go cause Abase say we go, because HE light brother. He say, and I must follow. Is never my choice. We travel years, and I miss home. I miss my father. I miss my Brothers. I miss Mother and sisters too." He straighten, putting his hands on his hips, an embittered smile on his lips, "Then I hear we to come home to Father's home, to home of brothers and I was happy. Finally I find home, I live life I want live, be with ones I love..." He barked a laugh, "Ha! I was wrong! We no come home, we come on NOTHER quest to land I no know. We go again away from home, from family, from those I love to follow man I no know and no like."

A flooded was let loose. A life time of words built up in a mind that could never speak, because there were never any ears to hear. It seemed Delani, for good or ill, had become the ears Irist had always wished would listen, "But I no have say. I Dark Brother. I voice in shadow, I soul no one like. I shadow of Abase, and shadow no talk. It follow. It do as Light brother does, it do what brother wills because brother's will is absolute."

Anger, hurt, sadness, jealousy, and the bitterest of feelings flooded Irist as he spoke words he never thought he would ever speak, because who would ever listen to a shadow?

"Because I born last, I shadow and must obey light. My voice no heard, my opinion no heard, my thoughts no heard. I silent watcher, called when need stuff doing. So I do as brother say over and over. I fight when he say we fight, I travel when he say travel." He laughed, though there was no amusement or joy there, "Now I go buy supplies for trip I no wish for. Now I go put life on line for cause I no believe in. I no heard."

Irist looked down at Delani, "Is so wrong to want choice? Is so wrong to want opinion matter? I prisoner," He patted his chest, "Trapped in cage of flesh where none hear voice unless Abase wishes it. I no have say in life, I no have choice in quest. I no have chance to say what I want, because what I want no matter. I just Djasirist... Name mean veiled speaker. I speak behind curtain, where no one see and no one hear."

Some might say that Irist is the exact opposite of Abase, but they would be wrong. Irist and Abase share many similarities, including their passion and depth of emotion. Irist was as sensitive as Abase was, but his sensitivity was always masked by a harsh exterior, tough skin and cold fury. During the speech Abase paced in the background, unsure what to make of his own twin soul's statements. He never knew, could never have known that his Dark Brother had felt this way. He had always thought that Irist wished for this as much as he did. Abase felt a shame like he had never known before, but he was not sure what he could do now.

[Delani Denusk]

The man began to speak, gruff and full of emotion, but also full of heart. She could see it in his eyes and the furious set of his form, the pent up frustrations of a soul too-long trapped. The essence of a child whose voice has long been suppressed. The previous agitation with the Akontak subsided quickly and Delani felt sympathy for this man who it seemed had been shouting in the dark, unheard, for too long.

After he had finished, she remained silent, jade eyes flicking between his as she calculated how to reply, how not to offend him. What would Eyris do?

"I stand by my notation that we must stand together, cooperate, on this journey, Irist; however, I...understand better the frustrations you feel. At times, silence is the wiser choice, but one can be silent only so long." She paused, looking towards the boats being loaded already with supplies from others participating in this expedition. "I understand what it is like to return to a home you no longer know. For where lies the coal in the sea, when the rains fall hard and the winds blow strong; it will not light for it is drowned and the devils in the grass come nigh..." Her eyes grew distant as she finished this thought. "...or is it we who are the devils?"

"Mine is a home ever roaming, following ancient paths and ancient ways until the time comes that demands change. But it is no longer where I belong. Perhaps that is why your brother goes, seeking something that lies somewhere beyond the horizon which he may not yet understand. It sounds as though he is restless of mind." This last bit brought the drykas to raise her shoulders in a shrug before continuing. "Born last does not mean you must obey, Irist. You have simply not been heard. I would suggest that Abase account for your desires as much as his; you exist together, do you not?"

Delani began to gesture, her hands moving in the expressive way of Pavi while retaining the Common tongue. "As Drykas, we know the importance of family. Life in the Sea of Grass is much more difficult than in the cities; we have all the dangers of the weather to contend with from flooding to drought to snows to bitter storms that spread fires with their lightning. Equally, we have the beasts to defend against. Ruinous glassbeaks, overzealous velispar, even Zith that seek to pluck us from the grasses like grain at harvest. We are a people founded in Unity." Her hands signed the word as she spoke it, the stiff joints of her left hand connecting index and thumb whilst the same of her right connected through them. This was then moved in a circle towards him and then back to her.

"Unity, Djasirist. We must unite to survive. We must all be strong and work together or we would die in less than a season, assuredly." It was strange for her to speak of unity when she herself felt disassociated to the Horse Clans now. She had her family back, but did she truly still fit as a Denusk? The events of mid-season in the clans still deeply troubled the woman. It would always be her home, but...it was not where she belonged. It was almost hypocritical of her to talk of unity, therefore. "But for that to work, all parties must listen. The strength of body means little if the mind has been drowned. Likewise, even the most knowledgeable mind will sink if the body cannot be sustained. So make yourself be heard. You needn't be violent, but make your brother hear you and know your feelings. Just because you are hidden does not mean you are silent."

At last, Delani smiled, hoping it might put him at ease as she finished. "I pray your brother has been listening, Djasirist; it is something both of you should heed."

[Abase]

She is wise... Abase said slowly, almost hesitantly.

Irist did not speak, did not look at Delani as she spoke, but neither did he interrupt or say anything to the contrary. He was not a man who enjoyed speaking of his feelings, and in fact he was in part ashamed for being so open with his frustrations. Still, what the woman said got to him, but perhaps more than the words Irist responded well to simply having someone listen to him.

There was no obvious outward showage that the words had gotten to him. His jaw was still set in a firm line, brows furrowed in what looked like annoyance or anger, and when he looked at Delani he might have been just as furious as before. When he spoke, though, his words were softer, "Unity is no so easy. Is no easy to find balance when two souls hold body. One always have final say. May never find true balance... but less complaining. Do no good to anyone."

Irist cleared his throat, looking away again, "You no speak of this... Is no wishing to tell others of inner struggles. Djasirist will remain as he is. Behind veil, behind Kasaiabase." Rubbing the back of his neck, very similar to how Abase did, Irist looked down at Delani, expression finally softening somewhat, "I go no to buy supplies. Will carry supplies for you too if needing to go. I no mind." Irist had never been one for thank you's and apologize, but he still tried to show his gratitude in what ways he could. Even if it was just offering to carry things while Delani shopped. It was the least he could do for the first person who ever heard him.

[Delani Denusk]

The woman laughed somewhat, her lips spread in a wide grin. "Nothing is ever as easy as it sounds, Irist. Nor do I agree that the two of you cannot find a balance in existence. Afterall, you live as one, why not act as one?" She did not mean Irist be Abase or Abase be Irist so much as finding that middle ground where they could coexist. Just search for something you both have in common and work upon it together. Develop that so you can better live, hm?"

She finished this and considered what he said next. "It s hardly my place to go gallivanting like a child with fresh gossip. As I said, it is often wiser to hold ones tongue. We are not dogs, afterall." Reflecting on the 'dog wags tongue' ideal. "And as for supplies, no, that is alright. Most of mine must wait to be boarded in the morning. I've arranged the purchase of the Deerstalkers from my cousin, Kavala, for the trip along with two of the ghost dogs she has. The rest is not something that could easily be carried by strength of body. It would most assuredly need carts." She fetched a copy of her supply list and showed him some of the items upon it, much of which wound up totalling a good few tons. And that was excluding her colorsplash, Coram, who weighed in at a hardy 2000 pounds. He was a big beast, built for cart pulling. He'd be doing some work when they reached Falyndar.