A songbird at heart. [Dex] [Done]

[Mishani Vita]

Spring 512. Day 23

"No one can see the dark side of me. This is the song of my heart that will keep beating till the end. I know i have no fortune, no money. But at least I know I'm alive... If the sun shines tomorrow, I know that life won't break me. I'm alive, these days, these seasons make me older all...the...time..." Mishani sang out loud, as she watched out to the seas. She sat on her favorite place, at the docks. The looked down in the grey water. The water flowed kindly against the stoned pier. The wind blew kindly against her soft skin, and she sighed. The loved the ocean. It was always so free and lawless. It could go anywhere it liked. It fed the creatures of the ocean. Gave food to the people. Oh how she wished to be a person with the freshness of the sea.

The sun was setting. Mish heard people talking and laughing. She just sat there, gazing to the horizon. She started to hum the continuation to the song she just made up. She loved singing. It was her way to escape her loneliness. She sang a lot of songs. Every day. She started to think about going to the city and make some friends, when her fright overtook her. She choked to her own voice and started to cough. She was afraid of crowds. Of course, she could sing for them for a little of money, but that wasn't much. She was betrayed by her own voice. Once again, she dropped a few tears to the ocean. A warm, southern breeze came by, and she spread her arms. She wished she had wings. She could fly to other lands, be free to fly wherever she wanted. A dream come true.

"I can't see the gloss of the ice in the mountain range. I can't feel the wind under my wings. I can't see our beautiful land high from the sky... I'm just a human, i can't do spectacular things. But i can trust you this word, of the promised lips. I promise, i will find someone to love. But this time is not... just... yet..." She ended her song with a smile on her face. Songs always made her happier. She was happy now. For a little while.

Of course, day turns to evening, and evening turns to night. It was evening. People started to walk back to their homes. It was getting colder. Mish had no place to go. She sold her home for some extra cash. Now she wondered why. She looked down at her bare feet. She barely reached the water. She hugged herself and hummed something not-so-smart and wagged her feet. It was getting later and later, but she just sat there. Alone.

[Dex]

Dex was out again. His ferret form loved to go out at dawn and dusk, which sort of became a ritual for himself. He would go out, find a place he thought appropriate, which changed generally from day to day, and watch the sun rise or the sun set. He generally did this in ferret form, but he felt like reminiscing from his travels, his journey to where he was now. And to do that, he wanted to be at the dock. Unfortunately, he had bad memories of being tossed out to sea as a ferret, so he always did this in human form, except for those very few times where he would walk the beach as a ferret. Tonight however was not one of those nights, at least not until maybe later. He walked up to the docks in his regular human clothes. In honesty, his only human clothes. He didn't wear them anywhere near as much as humans, so he only needed one set at a time. A tan light cotton shirt and loose denim plants and no shoes. Not quite to the docks, he heard something. A woman's voice, a human's voice, doing something he heard people called singing. He hadn't heard it much himself, and every so often it peaked his interest. His ferret hearing let him home in on it, finding a girl there at the end of the deck, curled up, suddenly quiet. Curiosity led him to talk to her, especially since she wasn't going to a home like the other people of the city on the beach. Slowly walking up to her, he sat down next to her and hugged her gently. She seemed sad, and Dex didn't like sadness. Sadness meant someone wasn't having fun. "What is wrong?"

[Mishani Vita]

Mish got a little startled when the person suddenly came and hugged her. She wasn't rather used to it, but deep in her head she felt a little happy. She looked at the guy. He was almost as old as she was. He had nice eyes too. But those eyes were different from normal human eyes. They were.. darker? Not that she looks people in the eyes very often, but she just guessed.

"Uh, hi? And nothings really 'wrong'... I'm just a little sad." She said and tried to smile a little. She clenched her fist, and was mad at herself to make other people worry about her. She wagged her feet back and forth, making small waves in the water. The water got darker when the day turned to evening. Just like the world. That's just how it went. A cold breeze suddenly came up and she closed her eyes, her hair dancing in the wind like sand. Mish was thinking, where would she sleep tonight? It was really going to be one of the colder nights this time. Not that she never slept under the bare sky before.

She lift her head ad looked to the horizon and started to sing softly. "As the clouds float by, we just live among. We live for so long. But when we leave, we can feel at ease. When we are born again, we have to break the chain. We must not make the same mistakes before the heart really awakes..." She stopped singing. She wasn't too used to sing around other people.

"So whats your name? And what are you doing here? Not that you're not allowed to be here... But i haven't seen you before." She felt awkward asking questions. It wasn't her style, but she wanted to know who the kind guy was. She thought about it. He was the first person who'd actually heard her sing to herself. She smiled a little and looked at the guy.

[Dex]

"Uh, hi? And nothings really 'wrong'... I'm just a little sad." Nothing really wrong .... and yet she was a little sad. Dex looked over this sentence in his head. Sadness is the opposite of fun, and fun is right. So sadness must be the opposite of right, which is wrong. Or was it left? He would figure this out later. She began to softly sing, and it made him interested. Not having heard people sing much, this fascinated him. Her voice was soft and light, yet it changed in sounds, causing interesting feelings to to come. It caused him to feel a sense of longing, of wanting to change, to do better. "So whats your name? And what are you doing here? Not that you're not allowed to be here... But i haven't seen you before." "I have several names. You can call me whatever you like. I came here because I love the sunset. The water reminds me of where I came from. My mom was with a Svefra, so I grew up on the water. I was born here, so I eventually returned. What about you? Why do you sing?"

[Mishani Vita]

Mishani smiled. To grow up at the sea must have been nice, the thought. But her parents hated the sea. She didn't know why, but they didn't tell her either. She promised herself that she'd go sailing one day. The water was still. No waves were made. And it was glimmering in all the colors of the sun. The sun was just half behind the horizon, and the water absorbed it's color's.

"I think I'll simply call you... John." It was the first name she could come up with. She sighed and looked down in the water. It was so peaceful now. She lift her feet up from the water and leaned them against the stone pier. She looked at her boots. She hated using shoes. Those worn out cheap leather boots she got from her dad. But there was a lot of sharp things on the ground in the nature. Of course, she was used to it, but it was difficult to move around with wounded feet.

"I sing because it helps me get my emotions straight. And i don't feel so lonely. I also feel like i have a connection to the nature through my singing. But i don't like so sing in public." She talked too much again. Or so she felt. But it was good to talk to someone who didn't laugh at her cliched life that she had. But she didn't know how to change it.

[Dex]

She decided to call him John. An odd coincidence, since that was the name he was generally going by now. Of course he made it on accident himself, so maybe it wasn't entirely a coincidence. He pondered the idea of singing, and why she did it. Her own singing had caused emotions in himself, so it made sense that it expressed her own emotions. "You are lonely? Why are you lonely? Do you not know anyone here yet?" John considered not knowing anyone here the only reason someone might be lonely. It hadn't occurred to him that she just didn't make friends with people that she had met already, which she may or may not of done. If you meet someone, it seemed to him that you should be friends.

[Mishani Vita]

Mish thought about the question. Yeah... Why was she really lonely? She didn't know it herself. Maybe.. She is shy? Afraid? Not used to many people around her? She certainly didn't know. The more the thought about it, the more unclear it became. "You put a good question there." She smiled. "I suppose it's because I'm afraid of rejection and how people will react to me."

that was probably the right answer. She really was afraid that people would deny her because she was a little kind of a gypsy. "I really have to think about that question when i find some place safe."" She smiled at the guy. Why was he so nice to her?

Anyhow, she was happy to have company. She closed her eyes. It was nighttime already. "So... Do you have any place to be? I mean, you certainly don't look like you'd been the richest of the rich. " She thought she sounded mean. But that was just not it.

[Dex]

Dex thought about what she had said. Rejection was not something Dex was familiar with. But people reacting to him he had a lot of experience in. Some people acted in shock, others angry, others pity. He didn't completely understand some of these emotions, but happiness and fun were ones that he did. So that was what he went around trying to spread, or at least make sure he was. "You do not have a place to be safe? Not a house or a den or anything?" This concept was slightly foreign yet familiar to him. When he landed on these shores .... no, he promised himself never to think about those days again. But the time on the boats, he had to find places for him to hide, to be safe in. And a few times, it ended up not being safe, and the only thing he had was himself. "What is rich? I collect shiny things, I make myself happy, I sometimes make other people happy, and I have a safe place to sleep. If this is rich, then yes I am. If it is not, then no, I am not rich. As for where do I go, it is not far from here, in one of the parks generally. Where do you go?"

[Mishani Vita]

It was funny how she felt secure talking to someone. She was happy. Just like she was happy when her family was still... no, she shook her head. Not thinking of that now. She had to forget all her bad memories, and be the happy girl she always was. "My home doesn't exist anymore, so i usually find some warm place to sleep." She thought for a little time. "And i don't think i could find any den that's not taken by an animal already." She wasn't a animal. Nor was she entirely human either. But she wasn't a mixed blood. She was just a nature child. Yup. Just that.

Mish tilted her head back and looked at the sky. clouds floated by like smoke. Just like every day. "Rich is something when you have a lot of Miza. Let's say... You have 10 000 gold Mizas, and i have 5. That means you're rich and I'm poor. And rich people are, sometimes, really selfish and don't like poor people." True. But what about people have 101 gold miza and 100? Which one is poor, which rich? She couldn't decide that. Rich people always looked down on her and she had always looked up on them.

"I must look for a place to be. But i don't have a permanent place to live. So tonight I might find a mattress, tomorrow a shelter. Or then a cave and so on. It's like a adventure every night. Looking for a place. " She sighed and closed her eyes.

[Dex]

Since he did not have 10,000 mizas, or just 5 mizas, apparently he was not rich or poor, which apparently was good, because rich people were mean. Dex considered when she talked about adventures. Adventures were fun. It was night time. Night time is when the food came out, so he might get some hunting in. "Can I join you on the adventure then? It sounds like a fun time." He didn't notice the fact that she seemed tired, or that she didn't want to go find a new place. But he was hopeful for a fun time, maybe with singing and happiness as they looked for a place for her to sleep.