Balm (Dusk)

[Sama'el Sunsinger]

"I'm not very good at it..." he said, gesturing loosely with his hand. "The whole thing. In case you were blind and deaf," he added lamely. "I have made friends. I just..." He struggled with the words, trying to dig them out of himself to offer to her. He had made a decision to do this, damn it. "I just don't trust people, I guess. I've been hurt and..." It all sounded so lame to him. His shoulders rounded with defeat. "I think Doc was right," he mumbled miserably.

[Dusk]

Merris' dark brows drew down as she watched him slump forward, every line of him a picture of defeat, and her heart went out to him. The cup was pushed under the bed and forgotten, and she rolled back to her feet for a moment before settling onto the bed beside him. The soft hand rose once more to his cheek and she turned his face towards hers, wide blue eyes staring into his. The length of her body leaned against his side, thigh pressed against his, breasts grazing his upper arm. "We are all of us lonely," she whispered softly, leaning in to press a soft kiss to the corner of his mouth, leaving behind the taste of honey and peppermint. "We are all of us hurt, in one way or another." She let the tip of her nose trace the line of his jaw, then pressed another kiss to his temple. "The latter does not mean that the former must be true, Sam."

[Sama'el Sunsinger]

He nodded, abashed, but trying. He leaned in to kiss her; she tasted like dessert, but the night had only begun. Perhaps this hadn't been wise. She was so perfect, it was like kissing a statue of Cheva when the urges in his pants demanded Nikali. Or perhaps they were two sides of the same coin. His lips parted as he dragged them from her cheek to her lips, noting the change from one soft, luxurious texture to another, distinct and wonderful. It was like she had chosen the wine rather than the tea, his mind swimming, then still and held in aching anticipation. Anger began to burn in the pit of his stomach, or perhaps it was fear. So many things were tied up in a tangle within him, one thing leading to several others until he didn't know his own mind. He inhaled suddenly, a ragged thing, and pulled back, confusion evident on his face. "Am I supposed to feel... angry?"

[Dusk]

She melted against him when he kissed her, mouth parting easily as she drank in the taste of him. Her hand curled and dove into the short spikes of his hair, pulling him closer as she pressed her body closer to him. She was surprised when he broke it off, a bit of confusion showing in her own face - until he asked his question, and she saw the twist of his features. It hit her, suddenly, where she had seen that look before. Merris caught her bottom lip between her teeth, peering at him with some soft emotion - not pity, not exactly, but understanding. "Ah," she murmured, those big blue eyes perusing his face as if she could read some bit of his history there. "Are you supposed to? No, not usually. But when... when we are ill-treated, and our own bodies used to break our spirits, well. Our bodies remember only the bad, and don't know that such things can bring pleasure instead of pain. It's... that's it, isn't it? I've seen it before. A few of the serving girls, they were slaves before. Tyras, he won't let them serve as companions, but he hires them on for other things since there isn't much more they know how to do. But they..." She hesitated, fingers still gently petting through his hair. "When they find someone they wish to be with, it's often hard for them, because their bodies don't remember how to love."

[Sama'el Sunsinger]

Her words, but more her understanding, made him flush and look away. He spent so much time and energy burying the past and keeping it interred, but people kept asking him if he was a Drykas no matter how short he kept his hair or well-concealed his windmark. And here he was trying actually enjoy himself for once and he did it wrong, and she could read him like a book and... "Yeah, they beat me when I was a slave," he said, jaw thrusting forward defensively. "What does that have to do with anything?" Knowing his anger was uncalled for didn't seem to help. Seeing kindness and compassion in her gorgeous blue eyes only made matters worse. The last thing he wanted was for someone as beautiful as her to lay him open and expose his ugliness.

[Dusk]

Merris turned her face into his shoulder, eyes closed as she rubbed her cheek against his shirt. This evening might see her hurt, but it wouldn't be the first time and at least this one served a purpose more than some client's sick pleasure. She bore no Ranuri to make her crave the pain, but she was good at reading people, and she had read him aright. He'd come to her because he'd reached his limit, and he had nowhere else to go. Had she not been so well trained, she would have sighed as she made the decision to see him through the worst of it this night. Instead, she just let her hands trace the hard line of his throat, down the length of his torso, skimming the length of him through his pants before moving on to his thigh. "I'm here for you tonight, Sam," she murmured, lifting her head to press a kiss to his shoulder, then up to his throat as her hand ran up and back down again. "Tell me what you would have of me, and I will gladly give it."

[Sama'el Sunsinger]

"I don't even know," he said quietly, deflating again. He had spent so long trying to shove everything into the ground and be the footloose and fancy free child he had been before everything had gone to hell, but it wasn't working. One couldn't erase eight years without some magic he didn't possess. Her hands, though, they had a sort of magic. His body responded the way it ought; the damage was psychic or, perhaps, spiritual. Sighing, he turned his cheek into her hair. "Can we?" he asked. "It might... maybe if we go slowly. Bear with me, I guess."

[Dusk]

She nodded at his request, one hand drifting up to cup his cheek and pull him into another soft kiss, her other hand still roaming the length of his thigh. After all, they had all night. No need to rush straight to it, not the way most men would. She smiled and twisted up to her knees on the bed, sliding behind him to brace herself against the wall. Careful hands grazed over his shoulders and down his back, then her fingertips firmed and she began a soothing massage to help him relax. "Did you know I'm from Avanthal?" she chuckled, lips whispering against his jawline as she leaned over his shoulder. "My mother was half-Vantha. Her eyes changed color every time her emotions did, like dropping dye into water. I was always so jealous of that, but my father is human so I got his instead," she chuckled. Easy words, meant to smooth the way between them, intimacy to ease them into sensuality.

[Sama'el Sunsinger]

Sam sighed with pleasure, sitting up so he could pull his shirt off. Suddenly he liked the way things were going; she could lull him all she wanted and then pounce, as it were. Leaning back into her hands and voice, he smiled. He had washed up before he came so he wouldn't smell like Horse, but he definitely preferred the scent she gave off. "But yours do change color," he protested quietly. "I mean, they're always mostly blue, but they brighten and darken, and, and... they change..." It was a lame compliment, perhaps, but it was a clear statement of truth. He had only met her the one time before and he had always remembered her eyes. Somehow he thought she could be anything she wanted if she put her mind to it, so perhaps she chose this. He was glad of that or he would likely never have had the opportunity to know her. He lifted his shoulder so he could trap her hand there between it and his cheek, rubbing against her clever fingers. "I never made it to Avanthal... I was exploring Taldera, but I wasn't prepared for the winter. I figured I would go back another time when I had the gear for the cold. If I do, I will bring you something back."

[Dusk]

She gave a sultry chuckle as he caught her hand, twisting it to caress the line of his cheek. Dark curls poured over his bare skin as she curled herself around his back, nuzzling her cheek against his shoulder as she loosely wrapped her arms around him. It was an intimate intertwining, more affectionate than seductive, but her hands were cool and smooth - one still following the line of his jaw and the other travel the planes of his chest. "Ah, they can shift a little depending on what colors I paint around them, but that's more perception than change. When you see a true Vantha, you'll know what I mean when i say they change." She lifted her head and pressed a kiss to his throat before nuzzling back down again. "But the cold of the North is not for the unprepared. You were wise to turn back when you did. Many have been lost there. Had I not traveled with my family to Syliras, I doubt I would have been able to make it across Taldera on my own."