Seeing (Flashback)

by **L'orlei** on April 12th, 2013, 10:12 pm

Timestamp: Spring 13, 500 AV

L'orlei sat still, something very difficult for the young and energetic konti girl, but she knew she had to do it. She was about to learn something very special from her mother. Something secret. Something magical.

"Okay, L'orlei. Now I want you to concentrate. Just like you do when making a shield. Try to find your center, try to remain calm. It wont work if you are not calm."

This would not be L'orlei's first experience with magic. Her grandmother had already taught her the very most basic principles of shielding. She knew how to tap into the djed that was in her, but her mother was going to teach her something different to do with it.

L'orlei closed her eyes and slowly inhaled, her chest rising and falling with each breath, as she sought to calm her mind and find her center of peace. For a konti as young as she, this was particularly difficult. Her mind was raging with ideas and questions, wondering what it would be like to use this new magic, how difficult it would be, how good would she be at it, and a number of other things that she could not even begin to keep track of.

She knew it would take a while to calm her mind, it always did. She was still very much an amateur, at everything, really. But her mother wanted her to be prepared. For what? L'orlei had no idea, but apparently she needed to be prepared. Her mother was a mysterious woman, and there were many times when she confused L'orlei. There were even times when she scared her, but those were at night, when her mother dreamt. Many nights the woman had nightmares, and her cries could be heard throughout the house. They terrified L'orlei as much as they did her mother. She was blessed with the gift of Divination, but L'orlei sometimes wondered if it was a curse. Any time she asked her mother, however, she always responded with a smile and said she saw what she needed to see, and nothing more.

But L'orlei had to push such thoughts from her mind. In, and out. In, and out. She continued to breath, in and out, and slowly, her mind began to calm. Closing her eyes helped, it blocked out the distractions around her, but she could still hear. Luckily, it was quiet, and the only thing she could hear was her breathing, and that of her mother's.

by **L'orlei** on April 17th, 2013, 9:10 pm

It took some time, but eventually L'orlei felt it. It was always exciting when she reached that point within herself, that point where she could actually feel and manipulate her djed. It wasn't so much a physical place, to be precise, but more a state of mind. She was a novice and could not easily reach that state of mind, but she was learning.

L'orlei's mother, Alissa, had been more than just watching her. She had been studying the young konti's aura, and so when L'orlei entered the proper state of mind her mother knew it. The older konti leaned forward and placed an object on the ground between them, then whispered gently.

"Now, L'orlei. I want you to focus, and will your djed to your eyes. Auristics can be used with every sense, but vision is the easiest. Will it to your eyes, and focus on seeing. When you are ready, I will tell you to open them."

L'orlei nodded. This was the exciting part, but she knew she needed to keep herself under control. She continued to focus, and continued her breathing regiment. A slow in through the nose, an even and controlled out through barely parted lips. In deep through the nose, filling not only her chest, but her stomach, all of her lungs. Out through the mouth, releasing it all.

L'orlei focused on the djed, and focused on her eyes. She focused on focusing the djed. Currently it was spread throughout her entirely body, evenly, and functioning as it always did, fueling her and keeping her alive. But she directed some of it to her eyes, and she did as her mother asked, focusing on seeing, even though her eyes were closed. It was a slow process, taking many chimes, but soon the djed began to gather around her eyes, surrounding the ocular nerves and the portion of her brain that controlled her sense of sight.

"Now, open your eyes and focus on the object before you."

by **L'orlei** on April 26th, 2013, 8:33 pm

L'orlei opened her eyes and looked at the ground between herself and her mother. Between them she had placed a clam-shell, a whole one, which had not yet been pried open. At first glance L'orlei noticed nothing amiss about the clam-shell, but she knew what her mother was going to say before she ever said it.

"Focus on the shell. See it not as you do now, but with your djed."

L'orlei focused on the shell, staring at it for many chimes, but nothing happened. She knew, however, that when learning a new magic one had to be patient. It took her forever to produce her first shield. L'orlei maintained her breathing, keeping it steady, and kept her djed focused on enhancing her sight. Finally, after several more chimes, something did change about the object. She saw smoke.

Her eyes widened slightly, her pupils dilated, and it brought a smile to her mothers lips. Where there had been nothing but clear air around the shell before was now a thin, light gray layer of smoke, extending no more than a few inches out from the shell. Was it the shells aura? If it was, it wasn't what she had expected.. but it had to be, right?

"I see.. smoke? Gray smoke.. well, kind of. Almost white, really."

by **L'orlei** on April 26th, 2013, 8:45 pm

"Everyone sees auras differently. What you are seeing is probably the outermost layer of the aura. As you continue to look deeper, that smoke will probably change in some way. Look at it for as long as you can. When you start to grow tired, stop. We don't want you overgiving, do we?"

"No, mother, we don't. I'll be careful, I promise."

L'orlei continued to stare. It was hard not to break contact with the object, not to look elsewhere. What other auras might she see if she looked elsewhere? Her mother had warned her not to look at more than one aura at a time, however. At least not until she was much more proficient in the art.

She took a deep breath, slowly rotating her shoulders and trying to relax. She could feel the djed still churning inside her, waiting to be used, and she directed more of it to her eyes. The grayish-white smoke didn't change for a long time. It was moving, slowly, she could tell, but she could discern no patter or any other change for a long time. And then she noticed something else.. a second layer of smoke. It was as if she had suddenly pierced a veil, and there was something wholly new beneath it.

The second layer was pure white, and seemed far more dense than that of the slowly moving whispy gray aura on the outside. L'orlei had no idea what that white meant, however, and as she stared at it she struggled to figure it out. After a few chimes her mother spoke up again.

"What do you see now, L'orlei?"

"A.. second layer. This one is white and... it's a lot less smoky. It's not moving any much.. almost like it's a solid."

"You are probably looking at the shell, then," her mother confirmed, "If I had to guess, it appears less smoky because the shell is hard, and meant to protect. You will probably find anything made out of the same or similar material to have close to the same aura. Can you go any deeper?"

by **L'orlei** on April 26th, 2013, 9:03 pm

L'orlei nodded. She was beginning to feel a bit fatigued, but she wanted to see if she could go any further. She was beginning to understand why her mother had chosen a clam shell instead of something else. It had many layers that could easily be distinguished. The shell was obviously the outer layer, but clam shells held treasures within. Pearls, and of course the clam itself.

L'orlei continued to focus, though she could feel her eyes starting to itch a bit. It wouldn't be long before they would start watering and she would have to look away.

Come on, L'orlei, you can do it. Just focus a little longer, she thought to herself.

Her eyes were beginning to itch so much they were starting to sting, but she resisted the urge to blink or look away. She was starting to pierce through the next layer. She didn't know how she knew it, but she just did. The urge to close her eyes was almost unbearable.

And then it happened, she was through to the next layer! She saw a light blue smoke, barely moving at all.. but more importantly, that smoke was engulfed in a strange, black, almost liquidy substance. She gasped when she saw it and squeeze her eyes shut, cutting off the fuel of djed.

"Blessed goddess Rak'keli, what did I just see!?"

Slowly L'orlei opened her eyes, relieved to see the aura was gone, and saw only the shell and her mother once more. Her mother's face was grim, a tinge of sorrow in her eyes. The older konti reached across the short gap between them and laid a hand on L'orlei's knee.

"That, my darling, was death. The clam, once living, has been dead for some time. That is what happens when you take them out of the water for long. That is what death truly looks like."[i]

"It.. it was terrible. So.. scary, and sad."

Alissa nodded, her face still grim, and removed the comforting hand, grabbing the shell and placing it back into her pocket. She then stood, prompting L'orlei to stand as well, and led her daughter outside.

[i]"Death is a part of life, L'orlei. But as a healer, you have been tasked by Rak'keli to fight against it. That is why the aura appeared so terrifying to you. To me, it is not so frightening. But to you, pain.. death, you feel it more than others. All healers do. It is why you were chosen to fight against it, I believe."

L'orlei nodded. She knew those things, but she had never actually seen death before. And she did understand that it was a part of life, that there was no truly escaping it. Rak'keli's feud with Dira was one she could never truly win, but seeing that frightening aura, L'orlei could understand why she fought. She still had a lot to learn though, and was a long way from truly helping anybody.

"Your next lesson will be in a few days. For now.. get some rest."

End