Character for review

[Rhea]

Name: Rhea
Race: Mixed Blood (Dhani - Constrictor)
Birthday & Age: 18 years old, Season of Fall, Day 15
Location: Taldera, Falyndar
Gender: Female
Physical Description: Rhea is about six feet tall with a Stocky build. She has yellow snake eyes and a forked tongue that cause her speech to be slightly slurred and she has sensitive taste. Rhea’s eyes give her very short range temperature sensing (five feet), just enough to walk around in the night. Rhea has black here with a slight shimmer of blue in it.
Personality, Ethics, and Likes:
*Rationality: Stable
*Mannerism: Perceptive, Precise/exacting
*Self-Esteem: Modest
*Philosophy: Introverted, Pessimist
*Intellect: Active, Scheming
*Bravery: Calculating
*Morals: Normal
*Piety: Average
*Motivation: Energetic
*Interests: Dancing
*Loves: Gems
*Fears: Birds (Things from the sky)
*Hates: Myrians
*Manner: Courteous
*Mood: Even-tempered, Solitary/Secretive
*Honesty: Average
*Keeps: Typical possessions ,few quantity, functional quality
*Personal Habit: Organized
*State of Clothing: Clean
*Thrift: Covertous
Ethics:
Likes:
Dislikes: She hates Myrians for killing mother. She dislikes the cold.
Pre-Creation: Rhea was raised by mother alone. Her mother was a seer. Father left before Rhea was born. Rhea has no siblings. Rhea was raised to survive in the jungles and her mother taught her common so that someday Rhea could leave this land. Rhea didn’t care that much for her mother’s training as a seer. Rhea would rather work with her already strong body and trained enough to defend herself.
Rhea mother is a Vantha who had travel very much so south of her lands. Rhea didn’t inherit much of her mother’s traits besides her hair which has a slight bluish shimmer to as her mother’s did.

Rhea has always had an interest in gems and tried to learn whatever she could about them. She has never had the money to buy any really. Even as a young girl she remembers seeing them for sale in the cities. Her mother used to have a book about them and Rhea had memorized nearly every page of it.
Rhea does believe in her mother religion, but she isn’t advent follower. Sometimes she prays, but usually only when she is stressed. When life is going well, her thoughts don’t tend to drift ever to her religion. She does have her mother’s holy symbol. Usually when Rhea thinks about her mother, thoughts of her religion always happen. They both are tied together in her thoughts.
Rhea has been to both major cites of Myrains and Dhani as they both do allow foreigners. Mother well warned her not to stay anytime long in Zinrah. Appears being human or even mixed wasn’t good enough of a reason not to become dinner. Visiting in Toloba was great either. We are treated very cold there, but mother had some business dealing there. Rhea was too young to really understand what her mother’s business was. At the time, Rhea was a teenage and Rhea never visited either of those cities again. Even though Rhea isn’t full Dhani, She does have much of their blood and can’t be mistaken for a Human. Appears some Myrians felt her association with the Dhani was reason enough to have us killed.
Rhea lost her mother and her home. She returned from the jungle with some plants her mother requested to find the place was burn to the ground. There were Myrian tracks all about. Her only guess is someone took revenge upon her. Rhea doubts she could ever find out who did this. Myrains tend not care about dealing with foreigners.
Rhea has traveld to Myrian’s city for work and a vague hope to find those responsible. She felt that she had better chances to survive there then in the wilds. She found a tavern there that she could dance at for coins. The tavern caters mostly to foreigners.
Post Creation:
Initial Skills:
*Acrobatics: 10
*Climbing: 5
*Stealth 5
*Dancing: 5
*Unarmed Combat: 5
*Flux: 5
*Auristics: 5
*Observation: 10
*Wilderness Survival: 10
Earned Skill/Points:
*nothing yet
Equipment/Possessions:
*Clothing – White cotton.
*Waterskin
*Backpack
*Set (comb, brush, razor, eta)
*Eating Knife
*Flint and Steel
*Gold Holy Symbol
*Sap Pommel Dagger
*Card Deck (15gm)
*Hemp Rope 50’
*Bladed Boots
*Climbing Claws
*Sighting Lens
Ledger:
*2gm
God: Eyris (Wise One)
Lore:
*Knowledge of the physical Human Body
*Knowledge of the Gems
Languages:
*Common (Fluent)
*Myrian (basic)
*Vani (poor)

[Banshee]

Hello hello! My name is Banshee, and I am here to help you with the daunting task of joining the Mizahar Community. It is my duty to assist you with your Character Sheet, so that you can get to writing quickly and properly. And I've noticed several things that need addressed in your Character Sheet, that will need to be fixed before you can begin roleplaying here. You will need to read all of the tabs below, make the appropriate changes, then send me a Private Message. When that has all been done, I will remove this Intervention, and you can get back to roleplaying. Have a great day, and I can't wait to see more of your writing soon!   DoB You need a complete Date of Birth to coincide with your age. In order to be 18, and born in Fall, you'd have to be born in the year, 494 AV   Pre-Creation You should be more specific in your history. Things that stand out are statements such as "Her mother was a seer." What does that mean exactly? Does she have the Divination Gnosis? If so, do you have permission for that? Where was she raised? Families don't typically live in the wilds, they are incredibly dangerous. I strongly recommend you talk to Traverse about your Falyndar history. They are the DS of Taloba, and is the most knowledgeable on this subject.   Possessions Please deduct each item you purchased individually from your ledger.

[Rhea]

Reposted it with corrections. I hope you like it.