Raiha had so many special gifts. Kavala knew it the first time she'd met the Akontak. The lore she'd read on them in the past had said that they were closer to the Gods than any other race around namely because they came from two purebred stocks that when combined put them somewhere in the neighborhood of just short of Alvina status. Kavala respected that about Raiha and always gave her higher ground because she knew with such power came heavier burdens. And coupled with the fact that she had two souls instead of one, Kavala knew it couldn't be easy.
She pretty well hit the nail on the head about Radris and what he wanted. Raihas assessment of the situation just felt right. It felt true. And Kavala nodded slightly, understanding at last what Radris was probably feeling.
"I had no idea. I... I guess I didn't think much about what he would actually want or if it was any of his business. But it is, isn't it? There's no relationship with one without the other, is there? And if I can't stand up to scrutiny of Hatot's darker soul, there will never be peace with Hatot anyhow. I feel so... ignorant of the Akalak sometimes, Raiha. They are not like any people I've ever known. " Kavala said thoughtfully, understanding finally that she wasn't being tormented so much as being tested, pushed, provoked. It made her angry in a way, and that rage flooded her suddenly, startling her. Kavala prided herself on being emotionless in situations where she had no control. Her emotionless state protected her neatly. But lately she hadn't been able to tap the mask that often shut her down. It was as if her internal balance was all off and she didn't understand why...
And then Raiha spoke again. It took a moment for her words to sink in. Kavala's eyes widened and she at first was shocked that Raiha even brought up that Hatot and her sometimes got noisy at night. On the Sea of Grass all the families lived together. It was part of nature that couples took pleasure in each other. There were often others in the room when it happened as well since a great deal of privacy was lost within pavilions. Her father used to carry on with multiple wives and it was considered bad form to mention it if anyone was disturbed by the nocturnal activities. Even behind privacy screens people knew what was going on. If it didn't happen, no children would ever get born and the clans would not grow. It never seemed to bother the kelvics or even her sister who was far more practiced at pleasure than Kavala. Surely if Raiha ever mated up, Kavala wouldn't have any problems with her nocturnal activities nor be bothered by...
Pregnant? It just sank in what Raiha was telling her. It wasn't that she was complaining about Hatot and Kavala being noisy. It was that she was trying to say that their healthy relationship was bearing fruit. Kavala instantly widened her eyes in shock, then slipped her hands down her form to cup at her stomach. Pregnant? The Konti's mind whirled in thought. She opened her mouth, closed it, and looked directly at Raiha. She started shaking then in reaction, suddenly, acutely... uncertain.
Her gut told her Raiha was right. There were clues along the way. Her diet had changed, her emotions were out of control, and she was incredibly restless. They were all early signs of a Konti gestating. The healer in her looked at it medically while the woman in her looked at it socially.
"I was with the slavers for what seemed a long time. Not years but long enough to cycle through at least one fertility period. I never got pregnant, Raiha. And I should have. They used me a lot, multiple times a day, though the beatings might have accounted for why it didn't happen. I've always been... afraid I couldn't. When the Akalak healers examined me to clear me for Nakivak status, they said there was damage but they repaired it. They never promised fertility but said it was likely possible with the repairs. I've been here three seasons and I've always had this secret fear that I couldn't... well that I wouldn't be able too... and the Akalak would take what I've built away." She confessed, seemingly off on a tangent from what Raiha was saying. It was so strange to her that her value lay in only what her womb could produce.
But she'd lived with that fear that she'd be tapped by one of the men, her status invoked, and then she'd have to go through the motions with someone she didn't care about in order to carry a stranger's child. And what if she had and then nothing came of it? It was a nightmare she'd had before. A nameless faceless Akalak using her body then demanding in frustration to know why she wasn't swelling with his child. It resulted in more time with the faceless monster and more shame and more frustration until there was nothing left of her and the words 'useless' echoing in her mind. The nightmare had always ended the same - homeless and branded of no value - her bracelet removed, and her body deemed inferior.
What if it was a girl though? Would that ruin everything? It had to be a boy... an Akalak. It had to be. Kavala's fears suddenly transferred whole heartedly into the species and health of the baby rather than the nightmare of being used and used and used and never producing. Had she been thinking clearly she would have not been so prone to the swing of emotions, but that was part of her problem completely in that moment. She was restless, moody, and worried. Very worried.
Kavala's hand snaked out and took Raihas in that instant. She pressed her friend's hand to her abdomen and looked into her eyes.
"I know your an Akontak, Raiha. I know you have powers that your kind never speak of. You know things before others do. A lot of things. I've seen it, even with this situation you knew. What am I having? Tell me its a boy... tell me its not a Konti. Please.. can you tell?" Kavala asked, knowing she sounded crazy, that she needed sleep, and that being upset and just simply switching from one mood to another wasn't doing her much good.
She gave Raiha a chance to speak then settled again.
The Akontak had more to say then, about herself, and it gave Kavala in that transitory moment a chance to calm down and really see her friend in a whole new light. Raiha had problems and experiences that were utterly unique unto herself. She didn't have the support structure that the Akalaks had set up to help their boys grow into manhood and deal with their dual natures. Leaving her on Konti island, on her father's part, had been very damaging to a young person that really needed the support that only the Akalak could give her. Konti were great parents, but there were only so many things they could understand and only so much that was inside their scope of experience. Akontaks were not. Kavala shook her head sadly and met Raiha straight in the eyes.
"It seems to me it was a crime to leave you on Mura. I love my people, but the Konti aren't equipped nor are they trained in dealing with an Akontak child like you were. Mura was absolutely the worst possible place for you to grow up. I can only imagine that Kanikra needed discipline and boundaries and that you both needed help to balance each other out... help a Konti wouldn't know where to begin to give." Kavala said, a slight tint of anger to her voice now. Kavala didn't want to be critical, but the two girls' father should have known and taken things into his own hands and raised his own daughter - especially an Akontak.
Then Raiha went on to describe her dilemma, the cage she lived in, and how truly torn she was. Kani had no boundaries and nothing to really live for. Raiha might not see it, but Kavala could see it plain as day. Raiha was slightly stronger, more fiercely in control and she was the lighter half. She got to make all the decisions. She decided where the pair went, when, and what they wore what they did what they said. The Akontak claimed she talked constantly with Kani but even Kavala, who was no empath to sentient creatures, could tell that Kani's life wasn't anything but shit. She took second string to everything and was locked up in Raiha's head most of the time. It wasn't fair. And while Raiha described the signs of this unwitting abuse - the need to hurt, the willingness to kill the magpie, and the countless other things - Kavala frantically thought of what she cold do to help. Kani needed boundaries and a reason to be something other than she was. Until anything in her life changed, there was no recourse at all. None.
In a way, Kavala didn't blame her for all that she was.
Nor was she too surprised when Kani spoke to her, threatened her, and totally insighted her rage.
"Kani, I'm sorry you grew up on Mura, which in my opinion is the absolute worst place for an Akontak to be raised. You should have been here, under your father's watchful eye where both you and Raiha could have had the training that prevented the abuse that unwittingly happened to you from happening." Kavala said, unphased by Kanikra's threat.
"And I will do all I can to see that mistake is remedied because you are still young and its not too late to find a balance between Raiha and yourself. You both can have a good life, without all this violence and pain, and without her being terrified of what your going to do and you being so openly pissed off and bullish of her so much." Kavala said softly.
"But I will tell you one thing. I don't mind if you want to make threats against me. But you will not threaten Hatot and Radris' child, Kanrika. Nor will you keep traumatizing Raiha. And he may not be here to defend me, but because he cares enough about me to make sure I'm as safe as I can be, so he didn't leave me without options. And I'll tell you exactly what I'm going to do. I'm going to introduce you to a friend of mine that can help. Want to meet her?" Kavala said in a strangely detached voice. She hadn't shifted positions or made any moves to indicate what she was going to do. But suddenly her fist was there, where it hadn't been before, and it was slamming straight towards Raiha's nose. It was a move she'd practiced before with Hatot in his classes. The nasal bone was surrounded by a huge pressure point - one that if struck rapidly - often gave someone being attacked enough time to get away while the person with the broken bone simply often sat stunned.
"I call her Fist. She's a good friend." Kavala said, rather than gritting her teeth she instead relaxed into the fight accepting that it was coming, minding her breathing, and trying to figure out how to keep Kani away from her and more importantly Hatot's child.
