Etori's Journal

[Etori Whitevine]

Year 511AV Note from Etori’s father written on the first page of the Journal: 23rd of Fall, 511 Dearest Avori, I know you miss Saon. We all do. He was an excellent brother to you and a great son to me. He will be dearly missed. But the gods take who they want and there is no way of bringing him back to us. It is a malicious world my love. One we must embrace every day without choice. I am gifting you this journal in the hopes that you will express your loss in these pages instead of taking it out on yourself. It is not your fault. I hope you open your eyes and see that this isn’t what your brother would have wanted. Sincerely, Your father, Oress Snowsong. 25th of Fall, 511 : Dear Saon, You are dead! And I wish I was dead! Screw everything! I don’t want to live in a world without you… 27th of Fall, 511 : Dear Saon, I promised father I would at least try to write to you to help with the grief. But what can I say? You left us! You left me… How could you just leave without any warning, without a single goodbye? Even if I had the chance to say goodbye, it would still be painful. It hurts so much…I never thought you could cause me so much pain. You were the light in my life. Without you I am being suffocated by the darkness that surrounds me… 28th of Fall, 511 : Dear Saon, I had a thought. It wasn’t your choice to leave us was it. If that is the case, then can’t you come back? Would you return to us if you could? I wonder if you were happy in your life, or if you just put on a brave face for father and I. It is difficult to explain all the questions floating around in my head that I wish I could ask you. That I could never work up the courage to ask you when you were here with me. It is difficult to explain to you my thoughts and feelings. That I never got to tell you when you were alive… 29th of Fall, 511 : Dear Saon, It pains me to admit but I know it is the truth. Everyone second I got to spend with you, I took for granted. And for that, I can never forgive myself. 11th of Winter, 511 : Dear Saon, Today is my first birthday without you by my side. Or anyone else for that matter. Yes, I am completely alone… I don’t know how to feel. Birthdays have never been a joyful time for me. It just seems to remind me of the day I was born only to cause our mother to walk out on us…on you. And I know that you are reminded of that moment she left on this day, every year. On my birthday you thought of mother instead of me. Yet you were always so good at putting on an act to pretend you actually cared about my birthday. And for that, I love you.

[Etori Whitevine]

Year 512AV (Coming soon...)

[Etori Whitevine]

Year 513AV (Coming soon!)