3rd of Fall, 514 AV
Dark eyes stared up at her, lifeless and empty. It was amazing how empty someone’s eyes became when they died. They mirrored the last emotion that flickered across them but it was just a mirage, there was no emotion there – it was just her mind’s eye attempting to make some sense of the glassy void. She felt the warm blood on her hands and the cramp in her fingers now as she gripped her suvai. She hadn’t noticed it then, the tightness she held the weapon with, but she noticed it now and her fingers flexed reflexively in the shadow of her memory. His gut had given away to her suvai with brief resistance and then a shocking swiftness that she was convinced no one would understand unless they actually plunged a blade into flesh.
She felt the familiar pang of sorrow and self disgust that usually accompanied the memories of the forest that summer day but this time there was something nudging beneath the surface of her mind wanting to be let free. Alaia shook her head to rid herself of the images and feelings and instead she focused on the path she was taking around the sanctuary. She had taken to long walks alone lately, since moving to The Sanctuary she found herself being more choosey about who she was around and who she interacted with only going to the main part of the city rarely now. She had the ocean here, people she cared about and animals as well as many odd jobs on top of her healing. What more could she need?
“What more indeed?” A frown tugged at her lips and her brows creased shadowing her face in a look of distaste. She needed to pull herself out of this mind set and do something that would just make her forget the bandit and the sin she committed. The healer’s feet already were aiming her towards the outdoors and to the beach of the island so that she could feel the sand under her feet. She was never one for much physical activity, not because she hated it but because she typically had her hands full with healing, today she wanted nothing more than to feel her muscles burn. The sand was hot under her feet after Syna’s light had already been beating on it for several bells, she walked to the damper sand where there was less give to the ground and then she turned to her left and started to slowly jog.
Her dress whipped around her and her footsteps were washed away every few chimes as the tide rolled in and rolled out again, the ocean was her only sense of serenity. The sound of the waves and the birds diving for fish settled her slightly, her arms pumped at her sides in time with each land of her foot. The scent of brine clung to her and made her nostrils flare while her mind churned with a darkness that was not typical of her. Maybe she was depressed? She remembered when Caelum had fixed that feeling after she showed up at his door bloody and broken but this didn’t feel the same as that. This felt to be more accepted by her mind rather than the chasm that had opened up in her that day in the summer.
Alaia pumped her legs harder, her jog suddenly turned into a run and her face scrunched in concentration. Each step dug into the wet sand, some of them splashed water up onto her legs and some of them dug the grains a little too deeply into the webs between her toes but she didn’t care. Slowly chime after chime the running held no thoughts and she focused only on her breathing and the movements of her limbs. A pain started first in her side, a stitch she thought she remembered someone calling it once, she had a stitch in her side and she focused on the pain. The burning pain of her side that was soon followed by the wheeze of her breath – she was clearly not a runner but she needed to do something rather than sit around thinking about darker days.
.
Dark eyes stared up at her, lifeless and empty. It was amazing how empty someone’s eyes became when they died. They mirrored the last emotion that flickered across them but it was just a mirage, there was no emotion there – it was just her mind’s eye attempting to make some sense of the glassy void. She felt the warm blood on her hands and the cramp in her fingers now as she gripped her suvai. She hadn’t noticed it then, the tightness she held the weapon with, but she noticed it now and her fingers flexed reflexively in the shadow of her memory. His gut had given away to her suvai with brief resistance and then a shocking swiftness that she was convinced no one would understand unless they actually plunged a blade into flesh.
She felt the familiar pang of sorrow and self disgust that usually accompanied the memories of the forest that summer day but this time there was something nudging beneath the surface of her mind wanting to be let free. Alaia shook her head to rid herself of the images and feelings and instead she focused on the path she was taking around the sanctuary. She had taken to long walks alone lately, since moving to The Sanctuary she found herself being more choosey about who she was around and who she interacted with only going to the main part of the city rarely now. She had the ocean here, people she cared about and animals as well as many odd jobs on top of her healing. What more could she need?
“What more indeed?” A frown tugged at her lips and her brows creased shadowing her face in a look of distaste. She needed to pull herself out of this mind set and do something that would just make her forget the bandit and the sin she committed. The healer’s feet already were aiming her towards the outdoors and to the beach of the island so that she could feel the sand under her feet. She was never one for much physical activity, not because she hated it but because she typically had her hands full with healing, today she wanted nothing more than to feel her muscles burn. The sand was hot under her feet after Syna’s light had already been beating on it for several bells, she walked to the damper sand where there was less give to the ground and then she turned to her left and started to slowly jog.
Her dress whipped around her and her footsteps were washed away every few chimes as the tide rolled in and rolled out again, the ocean was her only sense of serenity. The sound of the waves and the birds diving for fish settled her slightly, her arms pumped at her sides in time with each land of her foot. The scent of brine clung to her and made her nostrils flare while her mind churned with a darkness that was not typical of her. Maybe she was depressed? She remembered when Caelum had fixed that feeling after she showed up at his door bloody and broken but this didn’t feel the same as that. This felt to be more accepted by her mind rather than the chasm that had opened up in her that day in the summer.
Alaia pumped her legs harder, her jog suddenly turned into a run and her face scrunched in concentration. Each step dug into the wet sand, some of them splashed water up onto her legs and some of them dug the grains a little too deeply into the webs between her toes but she didn’t care. Slowly chime after chime the running held no thoughts and she focused only on her breathing and the movements of her limbs. A pain started first in her side, a stitch she thought she remembered someone calling it once, she had a stitch in her side and she focused on the pain. The burning pain of her side that was soon followed by the wheeze of her breath – she was clearly not a runner but she needed to do something rather than sit around thinking about darker days.
.
