Closed [The White Swan]Wandering the Sands (Clyde)

[Elann]

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Continuation :

Continued from here

Timestamp 7th evening of Winter, 515AV

Something had struck a nerve in her dinner partner. From the beginning of her speaking about how he should visit his parents, weariness grew upon him. It was overwhelming anguish in her eyes and she knew the matter weighed so heavily on him. His eyes seemed to study for the explanation on how and why he could not heed her advice and when Elann finished, she waited patiently for him to gather his thoughts.

As his voice crept out, it was as if he was wounded, saying he envied her in her ability to believe in his family's goodness. Curiosity struck her as he began to paint a picture, causing her to lean forward and listen, much more engaged and intent of hearing his plight.

He asked her a rhetorical question, something she didn't fully understand yet and was prepared to answer, but then he did for her. The answer he gave made her smile very slightly and she nodded in agreement. His points were very valid, and as he continued she nervously reached up to pull at her hair. The scenario that was unfolding became worse and worse until he paused.

As though his conversation had controlled her hand, she herself paused, awaiting his answer, and when it came she remained silently watching him from behind the small display of winter arrangement on their booth. He had not even finished his first portion and already her eyes fell upon it wondering how he could not be full after that. The thought was brief and was quickly squashed down by concern for the 5-year old version of him.

He then met her eyes directly and she clasped her hands in her waist, ice cold fingers interwoven in anticipation for what was to come.

"If you wish me to."

She said hesitantly, not exactly sure what such a secret was. Who would she tell anyways? Noah? Her father's friend? Garland? The words were spoken with pure honesty. She didn't really tell secrets nor understand the point in keeping them unless it was in offense to another person, so she didn't really know what he would tell her.

As he revealed he was a mage to her she nodded slowly, though her eyes showed she didn't fully comprehend how his father would hate him. She had learned very little of magic, and while the world hated magic for the most part, she didn't. In a way curiosity sprung from her coupled with sorrow.

"I understand you...I think," she said calmly with a face of frustration in attempting to both translate in her mind what she wanted to say and how to say it. A moment later she quietly voiced, "You have made magic every part of who you are, and so there is nothing left of the man who was his son inside of you. So he grew to hate you more and more the further down this path you went, but you just felt like it was you becoming who you are? Well Clyde," she paused, thinking a little more, "I am sure he was wounded by your choice, and he may still hate you completely, but I think you have to try." She brought her small weaver's fingers up to the edge of the table, like a dog would begging for a meal and said, "Morian at the Temple of All Gods said that Yahal's love for me is un...unconditional?, like that of a parent, and he will always forgive me, always see me for the brightness of my devotion and inda...individ...individuality. And while I understand that your father falls very short from his purity...I have to believe there is something in him, even if it is not seen by the eye that says that he too - even if by a tiny tiny bit - respects you for your devotion and individuality. Maybe it is that he will hate you right now completely. But maybe not in ten years. Maybe not in fifteen years. Who knows in the future. You show him love, he will change I think."

Other's Words ~~ My Words ~~ My Thoughts

[Clyde Sullins]

Clyde was gladdened to see that Elann wasn't yet another magic fearing peon. He'd met far to many, and after having taken a liking to the girl he would have been saddened to be disappointed in her.

Then again, it wasn't necessarily that she didn't fear or hate magic, but that she didn't understand it.

He shrugged in response to her words, having a feeling she didn't truly understand what he had said.

Clyde recalled his magic, recalled losing it and regaining it. He recalled who he'd been in that time when he'd lost it, though the memories were confused and hazy. He'd been in a daze, wandering without purpose. He'd tried to regain what he'd lost, but he didn't even understand what was lacking.

“Yes, but was it even a choice I made? I honestly don't recall. I may have chosen it, or it may have been chosen for me. The memories of when I began it all, they are muddled at best. Either way, can you truly blame a child for the choice they make? And at this point... At this point, my magic is as much a part of me as my left arm. And without it, I'd be as handicapped if I truly did lose said limb.”

Looking down, Clyde noticed that he'd finished his soup at some point, though he didn't recall eating it. He didn't feel any fuller, and as their conversation lulled the waiter returned, dropping off the next course and taking Clyde's emptied bowl. Clyde began to absentmindedly eat at the food, though he didn't taste much of it.

“I would try but... Honestly, I am more afraid of it than many other things. It is not an easy thing to face alone. People fear and hate the things they don't understand, often enough, and in this case I doubt he has learned anything.”

“I will consider it, alright Elann? But I make no promises... You ask quite a lot of me. But I will consider meeting them. Him. Both...”

Clyde let out another sigh, then turned to face Elann, trying to meet her eyes and to force his face to calm and gladden.

“But come, lets not focus just on these depressing things. Other topics, yes? You mentioned friends and people you'd met since coming to Syliras? Tell me about them. What do they do? I am sure you've had an interesting time or two since coming here.”

[Elann]

.

She didn't see him as some freak of nature or bringer of dooming events like many said came with those who did magic. He was a person, plain and simple. She watched as his next meal had come, slightly curious as to what they would give him next in a place like this, but more interested in what he had said.

He let out a sigh after making no promises to her about the task she laid before him. It seemed to indicate stress to her; a heavy burden. She knew somewhat about heavy burdens as she herself was far from perfect and seemed to accumulate them quite frequently. Still, he revealed that he didn't want to speak on it any further.

"Alright," she said in brief, allowing the conversation to turn toward her; not because she didn't want to know about him, magic, and what he intended to do, but because she had compassion on him. It was clearly a torment to his soul and she hoped and prayed one day he would reconcile.

"Well, not so interesting. I've been struggling a little to get by on my own, but I have a job now doing weaving for a business. I did go swimming though in the summer. That was fun. There is not very much water where I come from, just flowing and shifting sands. It is rare, but occasionally we find an oasis and camp near it. This is usually used for bathing in camp or drinking from if it is clean water. Rarely for swimming."

She smiled meekly and picked a tiny flake off the crust of her bread and ate it. The crust was buttery and delicious, but still, she was far from hungry. In the time it had taken him to eat nearly two courses, she had only picked apart a fourth of her small piece of bread.

"Let's see..." she continued, "I met a girl who sings and we have been singing a little bit, but I think she has left because I have not seen her in a while. I am down at the orphanage a bit, helping out the children there. I really like doing that when I am not working."

She didn't want to swamp him with every detail of her life, so she just gave him a little bit of it and let the conversation run from there.

Other's Words ~~ My Words ~~ My Thoughts

[Clyde Sullins]

As Elann spoke Clyde continued to eat, taking the opportunity when she was speaking to get in a few bites... And a few more... And so on. After awhile it might become obvious to the Benshiran that Clyde wasn't even fully aware he was eating, and was doing so more mechanically and by habit.

Likely he'd keep doing so until he felt full. And while he didn't feel starved nor did his belly feel empty, he still felt far from full.

By the time Elann finished speaking Clyde had finished another dish, and the waiter had snatched it up gracefully while replacing it with the next one.

This dish was a vegetable one, with various types carefully cooked in a red sweet sauce.

“Swimming? In the sea? Ah, thats still poor swimming to be done. What you want is a freshwater body of water to go properly swimming in. I've not gone swimming myself much, though I'd imagine sea water might be easier to learn in... But sea water is too salty. I believe there are some freshwater sources about. A waterfall or something, though I'm not certain exactly where. Maybe also a river. Though its, if my memory serves, a bit of a trip.”

“As for clothes... Mmm... That reminds me I should perhaps buy some winter clothes. I need some new robes, and some other items. Perhaps you could recommended a good place?”

He was interested to hear that she worked in her spare time at the orphanage. Though he couldn't help thinking it was a bit cliche. Perhaps she was truly a good person, which what he'd seen so far seemed to lean towards, or perhaps she was just overly trying to seem as such.

If Elann didn't take up his prior offer of sharing some food with her, he'd likely quickly eat his way through the next course absentmindedly.

[Elann]

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Watching Clyde, she began to wonder if he was a man who enjoyed eating a lot. A healthy appetite in the men of her tribe's diet was a good thing as they had to be ready for battle whenever, but this was something else entirely. Clyde just kept on going, as though he didn't even realize he was eating. She finished speaking and he at least showed he was listening to her. Now came a delicious looking vegetable dish that looked like something saucy.

"No, not the sea. I wouldn't do that. I don't know how to swim well enough for that. There is actually a little area right outside of town. A hot springs area I think is what you call it. The city was still very close. Do you know about it?"

"You want the Elegant Weave. We have all of our winter gear out. If you are going out in the cold, go there. We have been preparing for the cold by making a lot of product in the back. You likely will find it in there for a good price too."

She contemplated who else to tell him about. There was Noah, Garland, Morian, Vhertos, Nivel. So many people. Instead she opted to take a drink of her wine and asked him.

"What about you? Surely you've met some people on your travels who have been very strange or interesting."

A pleased look came over her face as she had reached her fill of bread. Her hand lingered on the table until she could wash it, upturned so as not to touch anything else with the butter upon her fingertips. Some people would have licked their fingers to clean them, but hers just sat there for the moment as she watched him eat his food.

"Are you enjoying your meal? This bread has been very good. I like the outside."

Hers was a culture who in the tents of her father, ate with their hands, so the forks and spoons on her side were not even touched by her; not that they would have been for bread anyways. Part of her wondered what was next for him. It seemed like lighter foods like vegetables and soup stuff. Was meat next?

Other's Words ~~ My Words ~~ My Thoughts

[Clyde Sullins]

Clyde nodded in response to her first question.

“I think I might have been there. Though I'm not totally sure... Sometimes the places I've visited get all mixed up.”

As they turned back to Clyde however, he hesitated, unsure of who or what he should talk about. As usual his mind turned back to magic, and in turn to his students of magic. He'd had various apprentices over the years, some for longer than others.

“I've met many people, but it seems after awhile they've all begun to run together. The ones I recall the best are my students. Most were human, though some not.”

“I met one Konti on Mura, who I taught some. She had a fascination for medicinal herbs, and even taught me a few things. She also helped me find Cha here, my staff.”

“I had another student who was half zith. She was quite the interesting little girl, full of fire. But she knew how to listen. If we'd stayed together, I don't doubt she'd have learned a lot.”

“Other ones were more fleeting. One who tried to take on a group of yukmen with little more than his bare fists. He certainly wasn't the smartest of my students... I imagine you know how that ended. Poorly.”

“A few others who didn't stick around long enough for me to learn much of them, or who didn't have a knack for things. I've had students all over, though I suppose never here in Syliras. Perhaps I'll find someone who will heed my words, and wish to learn from me. Or not, who knows...”

Clyde's thoughts wandered off for a few moments as he finished speaking, lost in memory and planning in turn.

As Elann asked of his meal, of how he was enjoying it, Clyde looked down to the dish before him. It was half eaten, which was the first thing he noticed. Next was that it wasn't the one he'd recalled having been eating. When had vegetables been brought out, he pondered to himself?

A bit confused at his food, Clyde gave a vague answer, while staring at his plate.

“Ah... Fine, fine... Would you like some? I did offer to share...”