The end of the season was approaching fast and Verena could not shake away the sense of foreboding that had shrouded her for quite some time. It was not because the date of her wedding was closing in, for she had known that it was inevitable since the day she stood facing Cas for the first time. It was also not because of the treacherous rumors that threatened her. It was... something she could not describe, and that made things much worse.
It also did not help that sleep eluded her tonight. She hated nights like this, when storms of thoughts threatened to knock her down.
A distraction was what she needed.
The young woman walked over to the white box that had been delivered to her clinic only yesterday. She did not have the courage or the time to inspect its inside, but she could guess what it would be. Opening it, Verena was not surprised to be right. It was the wedding dress that Lorana had picked out for her. The rich fabric was in beautiful shades of blue, most likely to match their wedding location which will be the beach at Stormsgrace. Carefully, she pulled it out of the box, letting the floor-length dress hanging in all its glory.
Hallan was mindlessly flipping through the records of their most recent patients when the door of his owner’s opened soundlessly. He wasn’t surprised that Verena wasn’t asleep yet – she had been especially restless ever since she returned from her week-long trip outside Kenash. Standing up from his seat, the slave cleared his throat. “My lady, may I help you with something?”
“Help me put on a dress,” was all she said. Nodding, the Benshiran followed the young woman into her office, closing the door behind him.
Accustomed to his mistress’s ways, Hallan was not at all surprised or puzzled at Verena’s boldness as she immediately shrugged off her robe. Things that might embarrass most people didn’t faze her in the same way. Still, the Benshiran slave knew his eyes had lingered too long on her body, which was barely hidden under the thin chemise.
When Verena moved her gaze, it was her turn to look at the slave who now had his back facing her. It gave her the full view of his bare back. Raised scars crisscrossed his back, disfiguring his skin. She was suddenly transported back to that horrible night. Her hands shaking as she painstakingly stitched every wound, knowing that each of them was her fault. The whole time he reassured her that he was fine, as if she was the patient instead.
Having taken off her chemise, Verena stepped into the lavish dress and stood in front of the tall mirror installed in the room. Something weighed heavily in her heart as she imagined herself doing the same thing on the day of her wedding. It was easier now to imagine spending her whole life with Cas. After all, she had spent most of her time with him anyway. He cared for her. At least you are given the time to know each other, Verena, most people do not even have that chance before they were married off – that’s what Zorane had told her countless times.
“Hallan,” she called out softly. The slave swiveled, his gaze stubbornly pinned on the ground. Wordlessly, he tightened and tied the ribbons that held the dress together, painstakingly avoiding to touch the healer’s bare back.
Verena watched him closely from the mirror, remembering that night that he was brought to her. The days she had spent to nurse him back to health. “Do you want to leave, Hallan?” she asked quietly. “Find your family? Learn who you were before you were–”
The Benshiran straightened, his hypnotic eyes looking straight at her from the mirror. He knew what his mistress was going to say, knew her well enough to know that the Lorak had the tendency to blame herself for not being able to save everyone. “Saved by a beautiful healer? Brought back to life by a stranger? I am content with my life here. Besides, I have told you that I remembered nothing and there is nothing for me to return to.”
“But you are a slave because of me,” Verena pointed out as she ran her fingers down the smooth fabric.
“Yes, I am,” he admitted. “I am also alive because of you.”
This was not the first time they had such a conversation. Every time she thought about Hallan, all she could do was wonder what his life would be if he had never had the bad luck of being brought to Kenash. Verena still remembered how severe the Benshiran’s injury was and she knew perfectly well that he would have died if he was not treated, but still… “Do you not want to be free? I can help you leave.”
Hallan did not answer immediately as he focused on tying the corset. The thought had crossed his mind before and it would be a horrendous lie to say he liked being a slave. Yet, he did not quite know how to respond to that offer. He couldn’t leave, if only for Verena’s sake. “Your sister will not be thrilled if she knew what you just said, Verena.”
What the slave said was true. Verena could not even imagine what Lorana would do to her if she found out that her sister had freed a slave willingly. Both of them knew it and so there was nothing else to say. Once Hallan was done, he took a step back and still avoided looking directly at her.
“You look enchanting, my lady,” he said, his eyes resting on the skirt of her dress. She was breathtaking, actually, and he feared that he might do something that would get them both into deep trouble.
Even Verena had to admit that the gown looked wondrous on her. The dressmaker had gotten her measurements perfectly, accentuating her every curve and hiding her imperfections. Lorana will be pleased. She could already imagine her older sister lecturing her about being a proper wife for Cas. Then she thought of Caedmon, watching her from afar. The young woman thought about her exiled mother next, wondering where she was now and whether if she was alright. The small fires of anger started to flicker inside her again.
“That’s it,” the Lorak announced abruptly, wanting to stop the emotions from flooding her. “Untie me.”
As her slave assisted her to step out of the dress, they were both startled by a sudden crash. Their heads turned toward the door, guessing that the noise came from outside.
“What was that?”
Hallan bowed. “I shall see what it was, my lady. You should finish undressing.”
Eager to place some distance between them, Hallan left the stuffy office. Sometimes he wished that he had gotten a crueler owner, one who would not treat him so kindly, one who would not make him forget that they were from different worlds. Back inside, there was a brief tick when he wanted to embrace and comfort her, to have her in his arms. He shook his head as he glanced toward the front door. Those were the kind of thoughts that would get them both killed.
When the slave saw the man lying on the ground just outside their clinic, he calmly opened the door and knelt beside him. He shook the man’s shoulder gently. “Sir, are you alright? Can you hear me?”
Ticks later, Verena would follow, still tying her robes together as her eyes quickly took note of the man’s injuries.