Tebridiar came round from her little pause, and she nodded at Aleksi.
She believed Aleksi would keep her safe, keep her out of harms way. That was one of the many reasons she loved her. Aleksi was perfect. But she couldn’t completely erase the hurt of the past. No one ever would be able to, even if that scar was magically taken away, subconsciously it would still hurt.
“I’m sorry I stopped. I just… I had… I couldn’t go further. I need to finish it, here and now. I need ot get everything out.” And closing her eyes, she continued on, looking down at her covered feet. She couldn’t make eye contact, she had to focus on not completely just breaking down there and then.
“So… in his room, they had more drinks, and more drinks, and more untill they could barely stand. The smell just overwhelmed me, I wanted to get away but one of the stronger men pushed against the door, he told me I wasn’t going anywhere.” She squeezed her eyes tightly shut, biting her lip. “He grabbed me and I tried to kick but I couldn’t. I couldn’t slip out, I couldn’t do anything. I was powerless. There was about six men, my Master not included, he had left to go to the bar. They took my clothes and threw them to the side of the room, I tried to cover myself but I couldn’t. They…” Her eyes widened, she gasped, and covered her face with her arms, grimacing. She spoke again, but much quieter, much more strained.
“They took their clothes off too. They did things while the others watched and egged them on. They laughed, and I was screaming and screaming. But no one downstairs could hear, it was… it was too loud downstairs. My Master was away buying the drinks and he was gone a long time, so they basically… had me to themselves.” She groaned in horror.
“They touch… they felt me. And they had horrible, rough, grabbing arms and they hurt me. I was too young. Far too young for… for that. But they did it.” She was crying, hanging her head in shame. “They took me. And I felt like I had been pulled open from the inside out and everything had been taken away. I was just a mess, I couldn't even look, I just... I just closed my eyes. I was absolutely covered in... in blood and... ugh. Each of them did it to me. Then they shoved me in the corner of a room and left me there, after they were done. I don’t know how long it was, could have been minutes, could have been days. I didn’t feel anything. I couldn’t take the pain.”
She convulsed horribly, remembering. Everyone had thought she was… pure, clean, innocent. She had tried to lock it away. She didn’t want to relive any of it. This wasn't about the scar anymore. This was about what had happened just before, on the same night. And it had been eating her alive all this time.