[Gossamer's Scrapbook] The Ethereal Canyon I

by **Gossamer** on March 9th, 2011, 8:40 am

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Obsessions

Everyone obsesses about music once in a while. This is my current favorite. A good friend of mine gave me a killer mixed CD of meditations, chants, and some pagan songs he thought I'd love. He was right.

Check SJ Tucker out. She's otherwise known as skinny white chick on the net.

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by **Gossamer** on March 9th, 2011, 4:12 pm

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Faith

I don't talk about my faith much. I should speak of it more. I want too. But faith is a path of broken glass at times. There are a lot of confused and lost people walking around. There are also damaged people out there as well - damaged by faith or betrayed by it. Pain is sometimes retained in people and for some reason a lot of that pain surrounds faith. When I say pain, I don't mean the physical kind. I mean the things that are deeper and more damaging: guilt, regret, loss, anger, and fear. I know people who have western faiths like christianity who are incredibly wonderful people. I know some that are incredibly hypocritical as well. The same goes for pagans. Faith doesn't make or break your life. Faith has the incredible power, however, to change it and make your life better.

I wish more people embraced faith and believed in something. The funny thing is I don't really mind what that belief system is(so long as it doesn't involve sacrificing babies etc) . I worry because the tendency these days are for folks to walk through their life in a state I consider somewhat blind. They don't tend to their spirits like they might tend to their muscle toning at the gym or the hunger rumbling in their belly. Its great to go to college and feed your brain. But what about the spirit? I'm not talking about saving ones soul. I don't believe in such things. What I mean is that interaction and feeling part of something larger. I believe the Gods are real. I've felt them in my presence and within me. I believe there are things in the world we don't understand and can't explain by science: now or ever. Faith isn't quantitative though it can have properties that mimic this. I also believe the divine is more than willing to touch you, enter you, be a part of your life in a way that makes your life a whole lot better.

Faith. It's such a complex word.

I was born to a somewhat unique situation. My grandmother was a full blooded Scotswoman and my grandfather was a full blooded Bannock Shoshone. My mother married back into a NativeScots combination so technically I'm about half and half any way you look at it. It makes me tall, big boned, goofy nosed, long thick hair, and completely and utterly attuned to nature. I mention my grandparents because they were the ones that raised me and my teachers in all things. Its a long story, but with my grandfather being a medicine man and my grandmother being a nurturing homeopath, I grew up a certain way and never quite got over it. And that's okay.

Recently, my husband has been witnessing a miracle.

I've always been a confident assertive person. But I haven't always been at peace with myself. A spiritual leader in my community circle recently got married and moved up no more than four miles away from my house. When you live in the country, this is 'neighbors' for certain. This gives me an opportunity to spend some real quality time with her. Earlier in the winter when I found out she moved and was close, she invited me to come to classes with her. Now that sounds a little nutty, having a spiritual class, but this leader does life coaching and it really shows in all her classes. They cost nothing. But I cannot tell you how much this enriches my life. I go mondays from noon to three and run off just before I have to be at work at three thirty in a nearby town. I find I've been leaving for her house earlier and earlier and spending time wandering around with her talking about all sorts of things.

Our classes wander. Sometimes they are about where we are lacking in our spiritual education. I have one other student in my class and we work together. He's a musician, so all our classes have a tendency to migrate towards music. Our teacher, in fact, did one whole day on chants and their impacts. We basically showed up and chanted the whole class. It was amazing. I went through the rest of the day in such a state of euphoria even the most rotten situation at work (the orange cleaner) didn't really phase me. My favorite chant was 'Mother I feel you...' because with my voice I can sing it somewhat awesomely. I say that humbly because I have no singing voice at all. But come to find out, people that don't sing can often chant very very well. There's something to say about chanting. I love it. I want to do it all the time. I find myself humming this in the car, while I'm working, even while I'm drifting in the tub relaxing in hot water.

You should try it. Alone, with a group, etc. But its better with a group. Trust me on that one.

Anyhow, back to the change my husband is witnessing. Being pagan is great. We get four Sabbaths, two equinoxes, two solstices, and then dark moon and full moon rituals. That's 24 moon gatherings and 8 major holidays a year. This means you have an excuse to get together with your friends at least twice a month if not three times a month. I dragged Gillar to Imbolc. He was shy and didn't want to participate. But he did run the music on the computer, which was cool. But hes been witnessing how much better I've been feeling about things, how relaxed I'm getting, and I think he sees how much I look forward to my monday classes.

So he's agreed to go to Ostara, which is not this weekend but next. Ostara is pretty incredible because it involves a whole host of 'rebirthing' processes. Ostara can change people's lives. There's not a person I know that hasn't attended an Ostara even that hasn't witnessed someone remembering something about their lives or suddenly becoming freed up. At my last class, we talked about our favorite Ostaras. My class partner teared up remembering his favorite in which he said goodbye finally to his ending relationship. It was a powerful memory. Mine was when one of my dear friends growing up walked up to the fire and started talking about her father, letting it go, in an intense admission of abuse. She changed her life that night, became stronger, moved out, and embraced her hidden homosexuality. Now she lives with three girls and they all run a successful business together and are about the happiest 'couple' I know. I tend to give away a lot of lingering anger at Ostara and it supercharges me for a few months at least afterwards.

This one will be particularly fun because each of us is bringing a dozen plastic eggs that we get to fill with anything and everything we want. Then, everyone at the event will get to hunt for the eggs and keep what they find. I'm going to put homemade jewelry in mine and a couple of coupons for bigger things - perhaps garden plants. So along with this beautiful letting go ritual where we burn a bondfire high and dance around it releasing old and inviting in new, we get to egg hunt. I told Matt I was going and he smiled and said it sounded like fun and he might just go along as well on this one. I asked cautiously... "To run the music?" And he shook his head. "No, I'd be joining you." That makes me happy. Very happy. Even if hes not the same faith as me (we have others in the group that are christian and hindi), he'll still enjoy himself. And this makes me wonderfully happy he might go along with us and participate.

So anyhow, happy Ostara everyone. I hope you have a great one and walking around this month you remember to see to your spiritual health as well as your mental and physical. They are all linked and they are all incredibly important.

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by **Gossamer** on March 15th, 2011, 4:50 pm

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Development

So I was out sitting in the tub last night with all the lights turned off thinking of various things. The frogs were in a full throated chorus and the stars were out bright. Our yard was plunged into darkness with only our cracked glass globe solar lights reflecting a soft glow on the trees and plants of our landscape. It was nice. It was beautiful in fact. It looked unearthly like we were someplace far away and inhuman - maybe the land of fae. If it wasn't roughly 38 degrees it would have been perfect. I love to drift my thoughts in this kind of landscape and atmosphere and see where they lead. I tend to wander back into the house after I get too hot or shriveled then blog. This blog is the result of one of those times.

The magic of last night made me think of Mizahar and development.

Development isn't easy. It is definitely one of the hardest things to get right in any game world. Its even harder to stay original and not use anything from anywhere else or at least not 'reuse' already overdone concepts. One of the first compliments we get from newbies generally involves 'Wow, I love the originality of the game world." Mizahar is vast. We've been working on it solid for two years to make it that way and it does keep growing. We have help now too, which makes it even nicer and more enthusiastic. But sometimes I feel sorry for that help. We keep strict rules on who gets to submit things and how. We depend heavily on our liaison to keep folks on a proper procedure and then we scrutinize everything after everyone else has picked it apart to make sure its up to our standards.

Most games don't do this. Then again, most games allow elves, furries and vampires to roam around.

Our standards are strict because we have a burning desire to be the best out there. We don't seriously know how to do things halfway or half-assed. It has to be perfect or as near to as perfect as we can make it. That's why development is so daunting. That's why its also so rewarding. You have to jump through hoops but once your done, you are absolutely one hundred percent a lore contributor. Everyone who writes here is a contributor to the game world, to the stories unfolding in Mizahar, but they in many ways don't pick up a paintbrush and expand out the world in a way a lore contributor does.

I get a big thrill each and every time someone asks to do a skill that's really needed then cranks out an article on the scale of say armor smithing or glassblowing. I say no alot too when people ask to do something I have had set aside or want to do myself. The reason is simple. Some of these skills are important for me to be done right. I don't think an apartment dweller can necessarily write an article on gardening or farming correctly without a huge interest and a whole lot of research. I don't think hypochondriacs can necessarily write great articles on medicine either. If you are here, solid, steady as a rock, and actively participating and showing interest odds are I'm going to say yes. If your flakey, gone again here again, and even if you think your an expert in the field, odds are I'm going to say no. It's my own personal hangup and I'm entitled to them.

I just wanted to explain that a bit.

I also think if you start something, you should finish it. This doesn't matter if its a specific skill, faction, area writeup, region synopsis, etc. If you commit, finish.

Painting the backdrop and setting the scenery for this great and fantastic verbal play is more important than you know. Recently we hit 2,000 lore articles, which is no small feat if you have perused our lore and seen that most of them are in excess of 5,000 words. We need to keep building. We need to keep growing. But we will not do this at the expense of quality. Ever. This is something everyone needs to understand.

Our quality makes Mizahar what it is.

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by **Gossamer** on March 15th, 2011, 5:26 pm

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Storytellers

I'd like to take a moment to make a few simple comments here. Sometimes power gets to people's head. Power, even the perception of it, is something fickle and illusionary. Storyteller's here have no real power over you the character unless you give them the ability to do so. We have a whole cohort of young storytellers, some of which are prone to loose their temper over absolutely nothing. They don't realize that when situations happen, it gets back to the Founders almost immediately. You can never tell who's who on this game nor who's logging your words or who's forwarding your PMs.

Be careful of this.

Have a care with your words, your accusations, and the way you treat people. It's one thing to be forthright and blunt in the face of stupidity - a teenager logging on and saying 'I'm playing because my mom banned my access too all other rpg sites...' Those types of folks need to be told bluntly how that appears to the community as a whole and then be encouraged to move on.

But, storytellers need to be above the bullshit of day to day cliches. They need to not publically pat their friends on the backs and scorn those they don't know so well. In chat they need to act maturely, answer questions, and keep topics on Mizahar or the game itself. Everyone needs fair and equal treatment from storytellers. This is something they agree to do when they volunteer to help the game.

If a storyteller isn't treating you correctly, the first thing to do is confront them about it. If you don't, then you aren't ever going to change them. Don't go run to a Founder until you've tried to deal with the situation yourself. I know that's a big burden to put on people, especially those that don't like confrontation. But don't you owe it to the person that same storyteller will dress down or mistreat in the future? Yes. You do. I'm not saying this happens commonly, but this week I've first hand experienced it happening personally and have heard about other incidents that have made me furrow my brow and go 'What the hell?"...

We aren't parents here and we aren't babysitters. Don't make us be.

Some of our help is incredibly young, and recently one of our older DS's suggested we start age capping those we allow to moderate (18 or older) unless there is outstanding circumstances. And frankly, I'm starting to agree. The only way, at this point, to change my mind on this is if I see some radical behavioral changes by our younger crowd.

So far I haven't seen these changes. I hope I will. I know my blog might be enough to start steering people in the right direction BEFORE I have to go start busting heads. But if it comes down to where I have to go speak to people personally, they won't be in a position of perceived power for very long.

Again, I emphasize perceived power. It is an illusion. A storyteller is just a player that decided to volunteer to help the game by moderating and grading. They are just people too. Don't... and I can't emphasize this enough... make of them more than what they are. Yes, if they say Domain in front of their names, they do control the world you walk in. That's their earned right. But truthfully I've had zero problems with DS's. Odds are if you are reading this, you know who you are and what the specific problems are. And I'm telling you right now you need to fix them and you need to make sure I never catch word of anything else happening ever again from your corner.

It's fine to have an opinion. It's fine to state that opinion. But if you make accusations, you'd better be right. You'd also better realize you have no idea in the long run who you are talking too or who's witnessing your bad behavior. So make sure your behavior shines through and is stellar.

I hope, sincerely, this is all that needs to be said. Expect a blog about chat in the next day or two.

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by **Alice** on March 19th, 2011, 10:29 am

Thank you for the pretty comment in my scrapbook. A few minutes later I realized that I could have made a Twilight joke out of it, but I'm glad I didn't ...

Also, I greatly enjoyed reading your post about faith. I think it's important for everyone too, and I'd love to explore that pagan community meetings you've talked about. Getting faith to live and breathe through practicing it together must be a wonderful experience. I can only guess it's close to singing in church, but more powerful, because people fully believe in what they say and feel it more immediately.

by **Gossamer** on March 20th, 2011, 12:33 pm

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Ugly Girls and Glamor Shots

I am a very plain looking person. I’ve always been fine with this. When I was younger and in High school there were these awards that everyone coveted in our Senior Year. They were ‘Best Senior…’ awards. They had things like ‘best smile’ and ‘best looking’ and ‘best dressed’. There were about ten of these awards given to the folks graduating. It was published in our senior year last newspaper. Everyone coveted pictures, dying to see who was getting what award. The Yearbook and Newspaper staff collectively voted for the winners. I never expected to see my face appear in it either. Much to my surprise, it did.

I’d already had a pile of scholarships on my desk at home proudly displayed that told me I had all the brains and whit I needed to bullshit my way through any college anywhere fee free. The most coveted of the stack was a full ride scholarship to the Art Institute of Seattle. I won a Millote Foundation award of 10K too in order to study wildlife biology. Lord knows why they gave me that one because that they were a medical foundation (I volunteered in the lab of the local hospital as a pathologists assistant/candy striper) and not anywhere related to the biological sciences. I remember I wrote them an essay about how Wildlife was directly related to the medical field because so many of our current and future diseases will come to humanity from yet undiscovered locations within animal populations siting Ebola and AIDS as prime examples. I might have insinuated (but never outright said!) that I wanted to study epidemics in animal populations and how they impacted humanity as a whole. They were keen on the idea, regardless. And I was keen on their funding.

McDonalds also gave me a big scholarship to the tune of 5k. It seems none of their employees ever applied for their employee scholarships so they had an overabundance of funding. I had to write a twenty page proposal on how McD’s related to my chosen field. I used the topic of the deforestation of the tropical rain forests for cattle meat production and the ways in which McD’s had chosen to address this issue in their meat acquisition methods as a topic. They liked it evidently because my 1k scholarship got multiplied by five. I was impressed and glad I’d slaved for them as a Drive Thru Queen for all the years of High school.

There were others, mostly departmental, credit union, and private donor merit based things. I even got a general scholarship to the University of Montana. I forget how much, but I was excited to have it. Another one came from my Bannock Shoshone tribe which was all but a full ride besides. All I had to do was prove to them what I could do for them with more education. Wildlife, it seems, was a big thumbs up.

But regardless, you get the idea – ugly girl compensating for the looks she doesn’t have by padding her resume and collecting money like some fluff minded girls collected battered copies of Vogue. Oh yea. And that was the year I realized too how miserable the beautiful people can be.

You heard me.

It all started with this girl name Daphnie. I’m sure shes married now so I don’t have to even remotely change her name to talk about her in a blog. She was gorgeous. She had blonde hair, blue eyes, cheerleader with the right family and the right moves. She was dating our one High schools token Asian. I was always confused by him because his name started out Van and then later got changed to Steve to be more American. Back then, if you were chinese in school in the US you didn’t want anyone to know it… or at least get clued in by your last name. Daphine and Van dated and it was always a scandal. Nowdays no one would have batted an eyelash, but in the 80's in rural Washington State, it was something unusual, especially since Van's family really disliked this girl but approved of their son dating her because her family was wealthy business owners in the area.

Anyhow, back to Daphine. She always wore the most perfect clothing – in style, designer brands, etc. That was the year I figured out how much it cost her to wear those things. It was an accident I learned it. I was 15 that year, a new senior in High School about to graduate and on the fast track to college when the girl I considered my nemesis throughout school (she was truly the meanest thing that ever walked in heels) showed me a softer completely abused side. She was in The Bon Marche shopping with her mother and back in the dressing rooms trying on a fashionable ensemble of bib overall shorts which where way hot that year fashion wise. Her mom was holding up this blood red sleazy but chic looking thing and Daphine had a plain jane denim colored one on. Daphine wanted the jean colored one. Her mom wanted her to wear the red and get that one. I’ve never heard a parent talk down to a child the way this mom talked down to Daphine. She called her fat, stupid, complained that her armpits weren't shaven, her root color (brown) was showing, and that she had acne. I'm not kidding. When I heard that parent talk to that child like that, my heart just bled. I also heard Daphine start crying.

Something in me cried too.

I looked at the girls meanness in a new light. She was full of pain, anger, rage, and so insecure that it wasn't funny. She came across nice too, super nice, especially to strangers and people who didn't really have the eyes to look past it to see how cardboard she really was. It wasn't her fault either. Her parents made her cardboard by treating her like that. But I always thought it was odd that Daphine didn't ever show pictures of herself anywhere that weren't... how shall we put it... glamor shots? There were no spontaneous shots of her with her friends. There were no shots of her in pjs or in shorts hanging out at a game. There were only carefully scripted carefully photographed shots of her perfectly made up and coifed or curled or in the case of the 80's... hair stacked. I had forever made fun of this in my mind. And to this day, when I see someone perhaps on facebook or even on this site with only 'professional' pictures, I know what it means. It means insecurity. It means profound sadness and hiding something that is slightly off. It might be a family issue. It might be a mental issue. But regardless its an issue.

Even professionals have candid shots.

That's why I love the 'Who Am I?' thread for its spontaneous pictures of a whole lot of folks not being serious. It glows with the vibrant of who all the people in that thread are, not with fake photographs or 'cover shots' hiding some ugly truth. Even if the pictures are ugly, there's still a wholesomeness in start snapshots and unscripted beauty.

So.. back to Daphine. Her mom marched out of the dressing room and I marched into it. I sat down with her as she cried and took her hands. She was a wreck and kept trying to keep me from seeing her face or hearing her tears. I finally told her I heard the whole thing. I also told her I thought the blue denim was a lot better than the red. I told her that she had to respect her mom, but there was no way respect guaranteed love. And I told her if she could just get through this year, she'd be off out where she finally got to make her own choices - college. I also told her she was beautiful, and apologized for every nasty thing I'd ever thought about her (which was a lot of nasty things). I did an artwork piece for her too, not long after that, where I used one of those glamor shots of her in her new sleazy red bib shorts suit. I colored in the big in blue denim and changed the background from a well manicured public street to a hay field with big rolls of hay already laid out. Instead of having her leaning against a building looking stern and fashionable, I had her laughing with her eyes full of joy and her whole body relaxed. It was part of my senior year featured display and I gave it to her afterwards. It was my real apology, not the one that I made to her in the dressing room that should have came from her mother instead of me.

So, back to being ugly and making the 'Best Senior...' list. I didn't even believe my eyes when I saw my face staring back at me in one of the categories. There was a caption under it too. The category was for Best Senior Artist. The words read... 'This artist has the ability to see through life's veneer and tap that which lurks just beneath and begs to be set free." I recently learned the author of that tag line was Daphine. One of my High school friends I ran into not very long ago was working on the yearbook and told me how hard Daphine fought with the rest of the staff to get me in there. I was stunned to learn that almost twenty years later. And now I remember her clapping for me when I stood up all those times to get the faculty awards as well... not only in Art but Biology Life and Earth Science, Calculus, and Genetics. I remember she won awards in Home Ec, Fashion, and The Student Hotline. I clapped for her too.

My reason for this blog is simple. Don't take the glamor shots at their face value and understand what's behind them when they start appearing. Odds are the soul behind them is wounded, hurting, and abused in some way or another. They might need a friend. So please be one. You never know.

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by **Gossamer** on March 20th, 2011, 5:15 pm

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Stereotypes

It is remarkably hard to get away from stereotypes in RPG games like Mizahar. They come at you from all directions and for all sorts of reasons. Women are helpless. Healers don’t cause harm. Warriors aren’t that smart. Elves have pointy ears and dwarves tend to be bearded and a little on the strong side. Cliches - one and all. I say again, with Mizahar, we really have tried. We don’t always succeed, but vigilance has completely paid off when it comes to the things we’ve said and done here.

I also, in my city design, have tried to avoid cliche cultures like 'asian centers' or 'nordic outposts'. There's no Native American bastions with endless teepees and certainly no typical metropolis in which all government resides. There are no Balliwood style palaces and certainly no mongol forces lurking out in the distance to take over. We don't have assassin clans nor do we have ogres, nymphs, and unicorns lurking to steal someone's something at any moment.

I want to keep it that way.

Stop heckling a Syliran Knight just because he uses a Katana. If your avatar is Asian, don't assume they are Lhavitian... there is no Lhavitian subrace with Epicanthic folds. We were asked. We said no because its too cliche. Why does every game everywhere want an asian, european, hispanic, indonesian, and arabic cultural center? Stop going in this direction. Play with whatever avatar you want to play with whever you want to play. I actually heard someone the other day say someone couldn't use a specific avatar because it didn't look like the 'race' that was there. Avanthal was supposed to be made up of folks with Epicanthic folds but we changed it up by giving them aurora eyes and streaks in their hair. Punking hair on avatars is always good fun. If your very white looking female knight wants to know how to dance with deadly fans, let them. If your very asian avatar bearing person wants to be a brawler, there's no reason they can't be. Stop saying no and making fun of people or demanding their avatars look a specific way for a specific race that isn't specific. Sure Charoda are sorta alien, Akalak's are blue, and Konti are white. Sure chacktawe have no whites to their eyes. But humans are humans and let them be humans. Demanding anything else is a disservice to this game.

People, I'm starting to be very disappointed and frustrated by the trends I've seen happen in game. Leave the RL Stereotyping at home. Cities should be a mishmash of survivors and the children's children of survivors. There's no type exactly. Drykas can have black avatars just like Myrians can look white as long as we make them as bloodthirsty as their culture allows. If they want to be cultural centers, fine, just don't make up your own culture and subrace to go with it. That's the problem with new cities and new ideas. There comes a point where fitting them into the game realistically is more than difficult due to this reason.

Also, beware of your histories. Places can't exist pre-valterrian if the current post valterrian terrain didn't exist before the Valterrian. I've had a number of folks ask me to let them invent strongholds or villages in Kalea that were pre-Valterrian. The only place in Kalea that survived the Valterrian remarkably unscathed was Denval. The rest of the continent was shoved up and mountains appeared where none were before all around it. Soem would say upon Sylir's death that he protected his closest bastion of knights from Ivak's rage. The rest of Kalea, from Wind Reach on down to Falyndar's Boarders is less than 500 years old, with unstable geology and impassable roads unless you are on the coast or can travel mountains on foot with relative ease.

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by **Gossamer** on March 20th, 2011, 5:20 pm

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Veteran D&D Players

If I hear spoken or insinuated, one more time, someone is an 'expert' on something because they have a vast expanse of D&D experience under their belt, I'm going to kick them in the head. Just because you geeked out, utterly failed socially as a child, and probably didn't get a date until you were 28 doesn't mean you are an expert in all things RPG because you played tabletop. Get over yourself. D&D got so many things that were irl true wrong it wasn't even funny.

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by **Gossamer** on March 27th, 2011, 5:46 am

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Player Driven Initiatives

What do I mean by that? It starts with a thread - a single thread - that plants an idea and then captures a player's imagination that then infects other players and grows into something bigger that more than one person shares in. You see, I've been asked lately about player organizations. People seem to want to write a huge extensive background for a group, make up members, then rp being part of that group. Fine. That's one way of doing it, but it's not - the best way - in my book. I know each of our 'books' reads a little differently, so your ideas might be vastly different than mine... but wouldn't you rather write the history of your own organization? Wouldn't you dearly love to say 'I created that?' or 'I'm the founder?' Each of you here gets to be that person if you think about it. Start with one. Start with yourself, fully formulate a plan, get a facility or safehouse, start doing threads, recruit others, form goals, have secret meetings, take charge. Take charge. Don't invent history, write history. It's nearly impossible for us to say no if someone lays the groundwork in thread and does all the ic work for it.

I can't tell you how vast Mizahar is and how much room it has for everyone to be doing their own thing. They can. They will. There's plenty of space.

This is one of the reasons we've recently picked a Featured Character, for doing just this - player driven initiative. Syndre is doing a drug lord scenario where he's starting an in game drug trade. I won't call it trafficking because drug use in Mizahar is not illegal.

Someone else recently began a dialog about creating new dog breeds. I am very familiar with this topic since I have a PC in Riverfall that's creating a new horse breed IC (and who also founded an organization). I'm happy to help with this and give advice and suggestions. This is just the type of rp scenarios we need here.

Are you a summoner? Discover a new world. Travel to it. Catalog it. Make that your thing. Sure there are risks, and you need someone left on the Mizahar side to open a portal so you can get back (since you can't portal TO mizahar)... but start a group dedicated to doing that. Just run an outline of the world through the help desk on what you want to discover, get approvals, and do it all IC.

Your pc can write a book on anything. Just do it IC.

Guilds should be abundant. So should secret societies. Historians should be desperate to recapture techniques and lost technology. Herbalists should be dying to find ancient pre-valterrian crop or medicinal seed and make it viable. Healers can form groups. Mercenaries can form groups. Heck, we said no villages and outposts in Mizahar other than the major cities unless they are player founded and supported through lots of RP. Go for it. Anything is possible IC. Anything.

Don't waste your time inventing history. I can't say that enough. Live it.

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by **Gossamer** on March 27th, 2011, 6:46 am

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My Attitude Lately...About Chat Especially

If this scrap had a theme song, the one below would be it. Jo Dee Messina has always been one of my favorite female country music artists. And with this song, she has hit the nail on the head dramatically.

I've worked my butt off building this site, being welcoming, answering questions, and trying to cater to serious roleplayers. I'm done, however, catering to the retards, toddlers, trolls, and generally lazy pbase - especially the young people - that log on and whine, lie, complain, or worse yet tell us how to run the place.

Go stuff yourselves, seriously.

I can't even be remotely nice. From the young lady who frankly threw a fit about baby abuse (which was filled with discrepancies - read lies - that utterly put me off) to the people that log on with names like Mr.Awesome and Ladysweetsin that then claim their age is in their mid to early teens - I'm going to throw a fit. If you were a parent and your kid was logging on the internet - a place full of child predators - and used a name like Ladysweetsin, wouldn't you freak out? And sorry folks, if you aren't 18-20, I don't consider you an adult, especially if I keep seeing you not acting like one. No manner of apologetic 'sorry I was stressed/sick/dumb/etc' is going to change my mind. Remember, folks can witness you doing a hundred things cool, but once you do something stupid or mean or evil, that's what they will remember, even if its more than balanced out by the good you are doing.

I've been lied to in chat.

I've been talked down to in chat.

I've been mortally offended in chat.

I'm just done tolerating any of it. Seriously. We created some chat rules. I expect them to be followed. I really do expect the naming rules to be followed as well. They are realistic. If you log on with a name like Mr.Awesome, you will be asked to change it. If you don't, then that's your choice, but its also our choice not to put up with you and invite you to go elsewhere.

I have bent over backwards for people on this site. I've given thousands of hours to its creation and will continue to do so. I do not, however, have to give any more twits the time of day or remotely put up with people telling me not to be so sharp or blunt or harsh. I'm just going to speak the truth.

This whole situation with this flood of children is really bothering me. It's like the second wave. People say 'Well, stay out of chat and it won't bother you.' But, I don't want chat - where people go to get help and discuss the site - to be an infestation that gives the wrong impression of what the site is about. Chat should be civilized, filled with people that are helpful, and not toddlers.

Its really just sucked my creativity dry. I'm starting to turn to other things in my life for joy and fulfillment. I've been painting copious amounts of birdhouses - twenty to be exact - and building a lot of things outside to improve my home. We've been remodeling and now we are putting up a greenhouse and I'm so enthusiastic about growing things its not even funny. But I have a ton of mizahar documents sitting on my hard drives that need to be put into the game. I have Ice Reaving all the way done. I have Phylonura done. I have Jewelcrafting, Mele, Lavis, Herbalism, Ryvata, Dagger, Medicine (Expansion), Meditation and Laviku all pretty much ready to go. I just need to add pictures and put the text in. But I can't really bring myself to sit here long enough to do it. I really want to get Blight done too because I have such plans for Blight in Wind Reach and gamewide. The Shroud are going to be a lot of fun. Events in Wind Reach with Ivak are going to be lots of fun.

I'm just tired. I'm just heart sore. I'm just fed up. So pretending to be nice to those that aren't and finding time to do anything besides hide in my PC's little world is going to be difficult. Eventually I'll come out of it, but probably not before there's been some incidents and my reputation is completely tarnished. But like Jo Dee sings: "My give a damn's busted."

lyrics :

EDIT: There's been some really awesome newbies lately too. I have zero complaints about them. They have names like Syndre, Fois, Vala and a dozen others that deserve to be named and should be. I regret it if I don't. So please don't think I feel all newbies are terrible. I don't. I am just zeroing in on a specific type, ones that really really torque me off.

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