[Gossamer's Scrapbook] The Ethereal Canyon I

[Gossamer]

Lesson's Learned

It's been a hard year. I think everyone feels this way. Today is Samhain and the new year for at least half my people. Luckily, the Shoshone side marks the seasons passing but not an actual new year. If anything, the tribe considers the first snowfall a 'new' year and counts age in terms of snowfalls traditionally. But the Manx side celebrate it with the dead and recognize all that has come to pass.

For me, today is a huge time of retrospection, reflecting back on what has happened this year and getting a chance to recognize all those who have passed that we miss day to day. Being a mixed blood Manx Shoshone woman is a lot better in my mind than being nothing spiritually. We don't actually 'miss' our dearly departed. We have them around daily, weekly, monthly... whenever the mood strikes the dead. I can't tell you how often I smell my grandmother's perfume and know she's checking up on me or I get pissed for no reason out of the blue and know my mother's standing beside me. I usually tell her to get lost. I can only imagine how frustrating it is for her to wait for me to live this life and pass over so she can get at me and try to convince me she wasn't a bad person.

So many people think of this year as a dearth year. It hasn't been for me. For me, this year has been overly abundant. I've had too much work time. I could pretty much work 24/7 and no one would complain that my company was shelling out overtime too liberally. I haven't gotten an abundance of sleep and I certainly haven't had enough home time. But I'm overall happy. The big bad pandemic has made all kinds of people sick, but no one I know that's got Covid has died. I know a lot of people died of covid - and that's a tragic thing - but I'm also one of those people that suspect a lot of usual deaths here in the US are now Covid deaths. Staring at the numbers, the usual suspects - heart disease and cancer - have dropped off radically in favor of pandemic deaths. And since I know there's financial gain to be had by hospitals reporting such things as covid deaths I know they are doing it.

But honestly, that's not what this scrap is about. This scrap is about me. I've changed. This year has taught me to trust people a whole lot less. I see everyone around me cheating the system... lying to be on unemployment, faking injuries to be on L&I, taking school money without taking school seriously, grabbing groceries at the food bank when they could be working, and just sitting around bemoaning their fates and how opressed they are. I hate that shit.

I can tell you one thing I know and that is my ancestors couldn't just walk into the the door, throw tea on, pour white sand sugar into it, drink it by the gallons like it wasn't something rare, and scrounge in the refrige for food or the fixings of food. They didn't have TP on the roll, sixty sets of outfits, multiple pairs of shoes, multiple vehicles, a home of their own that was warm all year round, horses they keep for pets, and medicine they can get prescribed by the bottle full. They didn't have paper which we have by the ream. They didn't have cell phones and could call up a foreign country and chat with a friend or relative for hours just to catch up. Travel was grueling and dangerous, not a vague worry that the TSA would make you take off your shoes or delay you hopping on a plane to do a full body search.

My people couldn't walk into a Walmart and have the choice of a hundred varieties and scents of soap. They had to save all their lard and bacon grease and hearth ashes to make soap that was the same kind used for thier laundry and their hands. My ancestors didn't have books, and those that did treated them like they were precious comodities. We have the internet and its nothing to google whatever we want.

We are living in such a Golden Age and no one wants to take time and think about that. No one wants to understand how priviliaged we are to even live in these times regardless of the color of our skin. Very few of us have realized true hunger or have mulitple siblings alive and multiple siblings that have starved to death as babies.

What I'm getting at is that I'm so tired of people complaining. I really am. I'm tired of people taking life for granted. I'm tired of people standing in the streets and decrying how abused and underpriviliaged they are because of their choice of sexuality or spirituality. These are weak, blind, and selfish people. They are so closed to whats all around them. They don't gather in celebration but in protest... and it's completely baffling to me.

It's far and away past time people start realizing WHAT THEY HAVE instead of what they don't have and desire. Each and every person out there has oportunities presented to them and available to them. I think of each person having a basket that they carry. And in that basket, things collect that are all about that person. Their joys, their loves, their thoughts... all of it. It all collects. And I see so many people with these baskets... some people call them plates... and refer to it as a full plate. But so many of these baskets are filled with such negative things that there is no room for anything more. There is no room for joy, for happiness, for satisfaction or fulfilment. They make no room for it.

My basket lately has been filled with a lot of anger about working too much. I've had work partners out on illness and have been babysitting a lot of helpers that don't end up being much help. You loose sight of whats important in that situation. And it hit me the other day that this year.... I've been getting regular iron infusions, my hemo has kept a close watch on my health, and I've been working my ass off ... and I'm so much better.

I had a few months where I came home just limping and unable to walk because my work is so physical that it really kills me to be at a dead run for eight hours. But lately.... I've been at a dead run for upwards of 14... or longer and I haven't had those crippling effects. My body at my age feels so much stronger than it has been in the last five years. I'm tired, but its expected for the hours I've been working. And tiredness isn't exhaustion. My muscles are doing so much better at bending, stretching, climbing a million steps, and my mood has improved.

That's what I mean about the fact I've changed. I've changed physically. I'm some sort of powerhouse now and I feel almost good... its a feeling I haven't felt in a long time. Its also a hard feeling to talk about or describe. I'm still a tall bulky person... you know the type. I could easily fit into a full back or line backer position on a football team and no one would realize I was a girl until they saw my hair and my boobs. Can they even see breasts under pads? I don't know. Hrm. Anyhow... I love this sensation.

There was a time I had to really convince myself to stand up to get up off the couch or even hop down off my yard goat. Much of that was a medical condition I had no idea I had... one that took us roughly two years to get under control... two years and I kid you not 22 iron infusions later. But now I'm holding steady and I just .... I can think again clear headedly. I want to actively learn. I want to live. I think nothing of running outside or getting up to go do something. I don't have to gather energy and talk myself into it. I was in a cage of some sort and I didn't even know it before.

And that's one of my realities... along with unlimited tea and sugar to put into it... all the paper I can handle and new ink or paint whenever I can be bothered to order some off Amazon. Money comes in. Money goes out. We have enough. Life is so much enough. I am satisfied. I'm happy. I love my husband dearly and feel so lucky that all these people around me have suffered through their partners not being true to them while mine looks at me daily like I hung the moon.

A few minutes ago he went outside to check 'his girls'. He was worried that the chickens might get to cold today and wanted to see if they were still comfortable and that everything is okay. When he got home from work today.... after working 10 hrs... he sat down to relax a few and play No Man's Sky a bit... and had five cats surrounding him and one sitting on his head licking his hair. What in the hell did I do to deserve this guy? I'm not the only one that loves him. The girls at work who work with him love him dearly and tell me all the time they do.

He doesn't talk much to people he doesn't know or isn't certain he likes. Matt has a no-nonsene attittude about people. If he needs them in his life he interacts. Otherwise, given a choice, he won't interact. But give him a kitten or a puppy or even something even more exotic like a walking stick bug and he'll bend over backwards to see to its comfort and joy. He's funny like that. But he'll quietly escort folks anywhere that need some watching. I can't tell you how many times he's driven me to Seattle for women's things and quietly hung out while I did my thing just to be around. I'm grateful for that.

I'm grateful for Miz too. We might make it to twenty years at this rate. And that's a good thing because I don't think I can save all my writing off site at this point. Plus I keep making PCs I like and want to write with, and that makes all the difference in the world. I keep meeting new people I want to write with as well. I keep missing older folks who have vanished and I've loved writing with too. But I look on that bright side as well. I've encountered people on the internet that I would have never otherwise met if Miz wasn't between us as some sort of common ground and meeting point. It is our Golden Age. The information highway connects us.

I have an APP on my phone that reflects this age too. It's called Disaster Alert. It notifies you when hurricanes hit, earthquakes strike, meterors fall, or even volcanos erupt. Our technology lets me care and worry for the Japanese who are in the middle of one of thier volcanos grumbling and threatening to erupt. I've been through that and can imagine their anxiety and feel for them... for people I don't know living in the shadow of a peak I've never seen. That's crazy. That's something my Ancestors didn't have. I'm fairly sure your's didn't have that ability either.

So if you take the time to read this scrap, take a minute to count all that you have against all that has come to pass in history. No matter how bad life seems... look at how amazing life is. You live in a time period where we don't know true war. You've never had to hold a rifle in your hands and know that you probably wouldn't live through the morning. Your city has never been shelled to the point its unrecognizable. You don't have a nuclear threat as close to home as Cuba. Things are pretty darn amazing. AMAZING. Hold on to that truth. Keep it in your heart. Let it burn through the bullshit and negativity that's out there and enlighten you.

It's Samhain. If not now, when?

[Gossamer]

I Need To Scrap More.

I can't for the life of me understand how it's April already. The snow was just falling and we were just celebrating the holidays (at work) a few short weeks ago it seems. Life goes on... and on... and on.... with rarely a break and the days run into each other so that a blur occurs where I tend to have no idea what time of day it is and even what day of the week it is. For all intent and purpose, life for me has been on hold.

All it has consisted of is work - day in and day out. I don't sit behind a desk at my job either. I am constantly moving trailers around a retail warehouse yard throwing them into doors to be loaded, and putting loaded ones into doors to be unloaded, pulling empties and spotting empties. I'm considered a hostler, though some people call us Yard Spotters or Yard Dogs. Lately though, I've been Command Central and something of a Help Desk all combined.

It's a confusing role for me since I tend to bark orders out and drive off. But that doesn't work so well under the new system and now I have to patiently explain the same things a billion times a day all while shouting due to inconsiderate drivers not being willing to turn off their trucks to hear my directions.

I have my foot in the accelerator constantly. I never stop. This previous week was rough because there were no breaks, no lunches, no time to stop and pee. I had to pee a lot and often just dashed into the office for a two-minute bathroom break while the other guys were peeing behind trailers and not bothering with taking time to run into someplace sanitary with hand soap. Gross.

We have new help at work. I hope this guy lasts. I know the situation well - its the same story over and over again - where a truck driver thinks a hostler has it easy and now he's knee-deep in 'holy shit what did I get myself into' land. Its not a nice place to go live, and I wouldn't even want to take 8-hour vacations there daily. But last week.... last week... I had to babysit. And since he came in at 1230 as his start time and I was there at 6.... that meant I had to stay until another veteran came to work at 4... 430ish. So... 10, 10.5 hr days day after day and then a 12 hr Saturday nearly killed me. Most of it was just because honestly I can get the work done alone faster than I can be teaching someone else to do it and 'help'. The help turns out usually to be not that great of help after all.... but this new guy shows promise. We'll see...

I left him alone at 230pm today because I had a doctor's appointment at 240pm... so there was no choice. He was pretty buried when I left... but I'll see tomorrow about how bad it was. I suspect the receivers and shippers waited a long time for their trailers, freight, and all the moves involved. It's not a glamorous job. It's a job that leaves me exhausted most days... and uncreative.

I thrive on art, you see. If I'm not doing some sort of art or writing, I feel a little dead inside. But using last week as an example... working ten hours... sometimes eleven or twelve and not even realizing holidays come and go... there's no time to actually be creative. I want to be. I need to be. Writing is part of who I am. And something in me Saturday felt broken, so the longer I sat there after that hellishly long shift exhausted, the more I resented the fact that I have literally no time to myself. But having Sunday off, I set about doing some development which was long overdue.

It was like smoothing a healing balm over an open wound.

We need new things on the site to keep relevant and current. We need new concepts as much as we need new players and new stories. We need so much! That need revolves around someone stepping up and doing these things. If I can put together an entirely new magic in less than 12 hrs with after an intense week like this... and do it with zero preconceived notions about wanting new magic or what one could be... then others can step up too. People with more free time than I have should be volunteering to Storytell, Moderate, run threads, Grade, and work on development. People at the very least should be posting! Post to keep Miz alive because we've been acting like a mothballed site here lately and that's not who we are.

I'm sorry my interaction has been sparse lately. My work schedule has precluded it. But hopefully, with this new hostler, I will stop working these long shifts and have time to hit the writing and art as I need to in order to stay sane. And I hope some of you - if not all of you - will consider stepping up and helping Miz out as well.

[Gossamer]

Long Memories and Vaccines

I have a very long memory. And painful memories last the longest... are retained in sharp detail, and aren't ever going to be forgotten. Memories like Mt. St. Helens' blowing in my back yard, meeting my husband, the death of my mother, and the Summer of 2002.

In 2002 West Nile Encephalitis officially hit WA State and horses started getting infected. At that time, the news was all bad all the time. Mosquitos that were trapped all over the state were found to be carrying it. Animals were getting it right and left... dogs, cats, bears, wolves, and especially horses. We were told if your horse got it, they were dead. DEAD. Horse owners everywhere were scared... really scared. Then this company... Fort Dodge... came out with a miracle cure! It was a Vaccine! Vets everywhere recommended it... and not only to get it... but to get it now... like yesterday and save your horse's life. Horses with Encephalitis of any kind didn't do well. The survival rate was very low. The care was very expensive... often requiring (we were told) a University level Vet Center. Most of those places even back in 2002 were about 10K just to unload your horse and get them looked at. I kid you not.

And if you know horse owners, you know how much we love our animals. We love love love them. They are part of our family, and if you understand the true horseman or horsewoman, you understand that we like our horses better than we like about 99% of the people out there.

I panicked too. OMG. The news was always right, right? Vets were always right! Well, guess what? Very few horses got West Nile, but everyone and their dog got the vaccine for it for their horses. Then.... something started happening. Pregnant mares started aborting their fetuses. Or worse... the mares would carry the foals to term and they would be born without limbs, without eyes, and otherwise grossly deformed. I bred back then too. I gave my big beautiful Belgian mare a west nile vaccine... because I was told that's what we needed to do. And guess what? When she was bred that year... she aborted too. My big Pinto mare? She absorbed and I could never get her pregnant again... she was sterile after that year.

Horse owners were in mourning everywhere. These abortions happened in almost EVERY case a horse was administered the vaccine both before or during gestation. We gathered, on the net and in real lie, and called ourselves The Lost Foal Group. We even got together a class action lawsuit against Fort Dodge who ultimately settled out of court for a measly promise of testing their vaccines more carefully... cruelty in and of itself... because that involved vaccinating horses, deliberately infecting them with West Nile, then letting it run its course and see how bad it was/how effective the vaccine was. Turns out the Vaccine did prevent West Nile. But... the carrier agent in the vaccine ... its stabilizer and delivery method? Yea... that caused horrible abortions and huge birth defects. Why? Because the Vaccine was rolled out too fast necessarily and marketed too hard based on fear. Fort Dodge and its stockholders made a record amount of money that year... yea... blood money.

There was a huge chat site devoted to it. I saw thousands of pictures of people's foals... they all looked similar to the one below and all had to be put down at birth if they weren't stillborn. We cried together, all of us, and blamed ourselves for jumping into a vaccine that wasn't merited at the time. We got caught up in the news media hype about West Nile and killed Mosquitos by the hundreds. Believe me, in WA state in 2002, there was no standing water that didn't have some sort of skeeter treatment in it or a lot of fat goldfish.

Did you take a long hard look at that pic? No legs. No eyes. Stillborn. The Lost Foals Group had thousands and thousands of pictures like this... where people lost their foals. It was honestly the lost generation of horses in the US. I know it was also as bad worldwide in countries that had never seen West Nile before.

What does this have to do with anything? I'll tell you what it has to do with today's situation. We, as a people, are getting marketed WORLDWIDE a gene therapy treatment that's experimental and labeled as a Vaccine. It doesn't matter what drug company puts out this therapy, Big Pharma and Big Government and Big Media and Bill Gates and Dr. Fauci are all driving this rollout. These are not good people or entities. And they are using the whole world as guinea pigs. It's about the $$$$$ and control over the general population no matter what country you live in. Goss! What do you mean this is gene therapy, not a vaccine?!?!?!

Here's a good video to watch to understand this better. It's currently banned on Youtube and will be on FB soon.

https://rumble.com/ve9nen-the-so-called-covid-19-vaccine.html

The problem is there is no accurate data set on the potential issues with the multiple gene therapies. It's far too early in their use. "Experts" can't even accurately say how long they will be effective. Their best guess is six months. I CHOOSE not to take it until more information is known. I CHOOSE to use my brain. There is no way they'd be shutting down as many J&J vaccine sites as they have in the US if blood clots are the only issue and the data was accurate on the percent chance of clots.

More is going on.

If you vaccinate you can still get Covid-19. You still are required to mask up. You can still die. They say you'll get a milder version. There is no statistically accurate study to prove this. There hasn't been enough time. Milder? So? It already has a huge survival rate.

There is literally no benefit for me to get it. These 'gene therapies' do not provide immunity against Covid-19. They do not prevent the spread of Covid-19. The only thing this gene therapy does is minimize your symptoms. That's all it promises. I wouldn't get it if I were older, immune-compromised, or in any risk group experts point out. These vaccines were rolled out without any animal studies or human studies AT ALL. Do you understand how dangerous this is? IT'S SUPER DANGEROUS. This is EXPERIMENTAL GENE THERAPY.

I remember 2002 in WA state. I remember the Lost Foals. I shudder every day to think of where these mass 'vaccinations' will lead us. You can believe me or not. It's no skin off my nose. But I'm posting this here so that in a few years and we are looking back, I can do a heavy "I told you so..."

But you are wrong about one thing... if this all goes south, remember Vaccines are protected against malpractice these days (partially because of Fort Dodge and the West Nile Vaccine) and are exempt from any sort of wrongful use or malpractice litigation. So you will NEVER see those infomercials asking... "Did you take the ____ Vaccine in 2021? You might be eligible for....." Because guess what? You won't be eligible for shit. And anything that happens to you is just stupid tax... a concept I've talked about in this blog before. With unknown long-term effects and no promise of eliminating Covid-19.... there's nothing in it for me or anyone else. Vaccine shame me all you want. I'm not an Anti-Vaxer. I'm Anti-stupid. These 'vaccines' may very well prove to be far more dangerous than Covid-19 infections themselves. Think about that.

[Gossamer]

I can't tell you how many people have informed me casually and without thought of how much they dislike me in one way or another here on Mizahar. One person said simply they wouldn't give me the time of day, another said they wouldn't go out for coffee with me, yet a third said they'd never give me consideration for friendship if we were the only two people left alive on the planet. I had to laugh at the last one because, with all the square miles on Earth, the chance of the only two people left alive on a planet like ours actually crossing paths is minimal. They'd be safe, I'm sure.

I can assure everyone I'm not the big bad wolf. I can also assure people I don't give a damn what you think about me or my opinions. If I did, I'd never state another thought or feeling out loud. I'm too busy working on how I think about myself. And deep down I know that people who use words to hurt just want others to feel the same way they feel inside; destroyed. Personality traits like know-it-all or bully just tend to cover up insecurities. Arrogance usually masks a whole host of other issues that I'm not accredited to speak about other than the 'in general' opinionated way I do.

Most people are jerks. Most people are so self-centered they can't get breathing room in their own lives and don't even realize it. Down-to-earth people are the ones I prefer to hang out with. I actually like the people that embrace their quirks as gifts and go with the flow. I like the people that treat everyone decently and don't judge folks until they actually meet them face to face. I will pick those sorts of folks every day over the people that like to tear others down to build themselves up. I like blunt, no-nonsense folks that are full of random fun facts and who lack filters.

I hate filters. I hate it that society tries to curb what we say, do, feel, and think. I hate it that the media does this as well. Mass Media's validity has been in question for years based on the fact that these are corps that are owned and ran for profit. I hate gratuitous scenes in movies that are unnecessary but thrown in to feed the current culture's need for inclusion. I don't care what color/race/sex/religion/orientation characters are. I don't care what nationality they are. Make sense? People are going to hate. Let them. People are going to love. Let them too. If a certain demography is represented realistically in the US as being under 4%, do they have to be in 100% of media just for that media to be considered inclusive? What about those demographics that are under 1%? What's wrong with the demography in sources of entertainment being reflected as it really is?

I feel inundated with things no one really cares about as a tactic to make those of us that don't care actually care. Deflection. Reflection. Cover-ups of the real issues. I want truths. I want facts and figures and not scare tactics and control. I don't care to be controlled, accepted, manipulated, or coerced.

And I don't care what people think about me wanting what I want. Why? Most of you are content to buy into the lies and go about your lives happily ever after not understanding what is really going on and not wanting to.

[Ayosel]

[style=border-radius: 20px 20px 20px 20px; width:640px;padding:25px; margin:auto; background-attachment: fixed; background-image:url(http://www.mizahar.com/forums/gallery/pic.php?mode=large&pic_id=64808); background-position: 50%;:3cpx81xk][style2=border-radius: 15px 15px 15px 15px; width:520px; padding-top:12px; padding-bottom:12px; padding-right:18px; padding-left:18px; margin:auto; background-color:#fff9f7; color:#7c0210:3cpx81xk][googlefont=Philosopher:3cpx81xk][size=105:3cpx81xk]I love the message here and the thing that tickled my funny bone in the kind of ugly way that gets a guffaw is the imagery of two people left alone on earth, one of them minding her business doing her thing and the other one relentlessly hunting her down just to say they can't be friends. Like who says that?

I'll always admit that I've lashed out at you before when I was an idiot following the words of other idiots out to hate you and start their super duper new exciting thrilling website but you've always been straightforward, honest, and direct. You're human, you're you, that's awesome, and you don't even need to care about me saying this and it really doesn't bother me to know that. I respect it. Not everybody has to like everybody else but they can get over themselves and learn to expect other people to just not care.

I'm glad you let me back in and I'm glad you're still here being a king and writing your stories. Working on how you think about yourself is... well, I admire it.

That's my dumping for the day. Thank you for being real.[/size:3cpx81xk][/googlefont:3cpx81xk][/style2:3cpx81xk][/style:3cpx81xk]

[Gossamer]

Liars & Fakes w/Online Personas

The Internet has taught me one thing quite strongly. People lie. People are fake. People don't want to reveal who they really are because they hate themselves. Thus they make up all kinds of bullshit and tend to plaster it all over Mizahar. Ask some of the older players. We've had the same people return to time and time again with various stories and various online personas that are nothing like their real-life situations or personalities.

It's made me a frequent checker of IPs. I know people can conceal IPs, so random ips that show one side of a continent one day then the other the next day is a tell. A guy who claims to live in Vegas that shows Vegas in his IP day after day then another city after he's written about a move is a legit dude. A guy that claims Canada but shows the Phillippines another day isn't. It's so easy to spot the bullshit now because we've seen it all.

Their wives were killed in tragic car accidents and they spend hours and hours writing stories in scraps about how they stared in coffins or went to the morgue to identify the body. We bought it. We lived it. We felt sorry for it. Sometimes we even sent money to help with funeral costs and all kinds of bullshit. We can't ever get back that emotional investment.

How about claiming to be legally blind or deaf and finding out your just a banned player that's returned multiple times who won't post a damn picture because we'll know its you - that crazy bitch - who is just here for attention and trouble. Miz isn't a place for attention. Its a god-damn writing site. It's not drama mama central.

But it's funny, there are tells throughout the situations that arise. Little mistakes. Slip ups. Wrong words in languages that are supposed to be their special tribal shit. Things that make no sense. And you know what? Their hate comes out eventually.

It usually comes out in chat when they have a bad day or wax on about a favorite topic that isn't actually part of the chat TOS anyhow. I spot it, I note it, I might comment or not comment, depending on how heated I feel about it... but then I let it lay.

And you know what? I don't spare them another thought. I don't answer HD tickets for them. I certainly don't mod for them. And I put them pretty much on ignore the whole rest of their career here if they stay. Why? Because I'm comfortable in being a nasty bitch when it comes to people who aren't who they say they are and obviously hate themselves more than they care to admit.

We are all projects our whole entire lives. Some people work on themselves enough to be acceptable to human society... open, welcoming, and contributing. Some people will always be leeches and have perpetual bad days. Its their life choice. You ultimately become who you want to be through hard work and busting your ass.... its like reaching for a degree in college or the perfect job/relationship/etc. You either get it or you don't... sometimes fate gets in the way but mostly its just us... our drives... our abilities to be flexible and really appreciate what we have and what we are instead of blaming all our damn problems on the rest of the world.

Hate is hate is hate is hate. The world will never get any better if all everyone does is hate... and because of that hate lie. Go ahead, live in that fantasy world you created. Liar. It makes you the worst sort of person. But we always find out... either through social media... or through your own vitriol slipping through. But I for one give people more credit in being able to see through the bullshit than the liars do. And in the end, when someone puts in the legwork to find out the truth... its always astonishing/shocking/and somehow unsurprising.

[Gossamer]

IRL Shortages

I'm putting this here so I will remember it in future years. After working a lovely ten hour shift unexpectedly, I'm home now and my husband is full of good news. I say this with utter sarcasm.

On this date, our gas prices are swiftly heading towards $4 a gallon. Experts predict it won't stop there. Most of the stations I saw on the way home were well above $3.50. I am not overjoyed. In Dec we were energy independent and gas was below $2.00 a gallon.

Matt informed me that we can no longer get any sort of chlorine for our hot tub so he's currently draining it so we can refill it and switch to bromine. He will have to pressure wash the filter as well. The chlorine shortage is due to the pandemic and a key spa and pool chemical plant burning down in Louisiana. Bromine is supposed to be better for you overall anyhow unless you have thyroid issues. I've been researching it really quickly since this was not something I expected to do today. I want to call a few people, namely my favorite spa place I go to for questions, but I worked so long today I have to wait until tomorrow.

Lumber is out of reach for most people. This is funny because I live in WA state where we are surrounded by beautiful trees and harvestable timber. We had to buy fence boards... 12x6's. I won't go by their cost because it is too shocking to even remotely think of. But this time last year, a 2x4 was about $4. Today they are $12.00. A friend of mine who works construction says they've halted all builds that require wood and are currently doing landscaping and concrete work to stay employed since bids that were just a couple of thousand dollars for small home changes are now bidding in at tens of thousands of dollars... and she's embarrassed to write out any bids. We had to buy wood to replace deck boards though before we paint it in a few months. I can't imagine how expensive paint will be by that time.

I know I picked up a quart to paint beehives and it was 29.99 a quart for outdoor paint at that time. Luckily I had a coupon and got it for 21.99. I remember easily when it was below $10 bucks at the really good paint store -Sherman and Williams. I won't buy paint anywhere else because its not worth the cheap shit places like Home Depot sell.

Supposably there is a nationwide shortage of catfood. We haven't seen it here on the west coast yet... but I'm wondering how much I should hoard. However, hoarding cat food might not be the best option when you can always get chicken, rice, and hamburger fairly easily to see them fed. Making the food is always going to be better for them than actually feeding them canned food anyhow.

I miss Uncle Don.

[Gossamer]

Here's Another Thing I Want To Remember

My work is so understaffed its not funny. Unemployment is paying at 100% + 300 extra dollars a week due to Covid. Two months ago it was paying at 100% + 600 a week. Thankfully they cut it down. But until they cut it down to 80% a shitton of lazy people are not going to ditch unemployment (and probably even not then) to go back to work full time. I think it will take cutting most people's benefits off totally before they grow a set and decide to re-enter the workforce because if they don't, they won't eat. Tough love, I know, but you can no longer say most businesses are closed. Most aren't. Most are open or trying to be open without employees.

We held a job fair through Worksource for our local Distribution Warehouse. The jobs start well over $20 bucks an hour and cap out in the thirties. Turnout? Zero. I'm rapidly developing yet a new intolerance. My list of things I tolerate and don't tolerate grows longer and longer the older I get. Stupidity, laziness, and misinformation top the later list. Ignorance tops the former list... because that can be fixed. But then again I find that most ignorant people don't have an open mind or enough intelligence to fix the ignorant situation... which moves most people onto the later list.

Just don't look at what others have and demand the same equality for yourself stating you don't have the same opportunities to gain that sort of accumulation of whatever it is you covet due to race, religion, sexual orientation, mental health, etc. Because it's utter bullshit. You get what you deserve. You get what you earn.

It's out there for the taking... but it's far easier to have a defeatist attitude that blames anything other than your own shortcomings for what you think you lack because you have zero ambition. I'm tired of the excuses. I'm also tired of those locked tight mindsets that make stupid comments about people they have no experience being but have plenty of experience blaming.

You're completely mental if you think you can understand the experience of being someone without being someone. Pure and simple. Write me off if you like, but honestly, my life is fairly easy because of my inherent understandings of such things. I live the dream. I own a home, am fully employed, have a well-funded retirement, and pretty much everything I could want except enough craft supplies. I covet those. But how did I get those things? Was it because of any privileges I have because of my color? Doubtful. Or was it because I've worked hard all my life and haven't ever taken a gap year or a covid year off or anything of the kind. Did I put myself through college? Yes. Did I work hard and get good grades, taking sometimes upwards of 20 credits a semester at a state university? Yes.

No one paid me reparations for what was done to my ancestors. No one gave me free money because I deserved it just for being born an outlier in a society of sames. I have the hardest time... honestly... understanding the youth of today that are so damn mad about what I consider nothing at all. We'd hire anyone at our company that could pass a drug test and don't mind being at work upwards of ten hours a day six days a week. It's not cruelty. It's reality. Why? Because our job is to get goods and services to those stores people shop at that are home 24/7 bored with the munchies. It's as simple as that. If we got more people hired, those of us employed would have to work less. And we'd then hire more people because we'd be back to five days a week and eight hour days.

It looks like society is just going to get worse though... not better. So pretty soon I won't be shocked (nor will I be happy) if we don't get any days off any more and the excuse is that.... too many people pick to stay home, be paid money they don't have to pay back, just because they think they deserve it.

I'm telling you as a working person... you don't deserve it. Get out and work.

[Gossamer]

A Win For The Fight Against Cancel Culture

On July 4, 1776, the Second Continental Congress unanimously adopted the Declaration of Independence, announcing the colonies' separation from Great Britain. This was the formation of the United States. What came after was a newly formed nation on a level not seen anywhere in the world. It wasn't a given that the United States would come into being. This new nation was born in blood fighting one of the most formidable world enemies since The Roman Empire, the British Redcoats. What would follow was a savage bloody war that only after France got involved and assisted the Continental Army, did the surrender of the British forces occur at Yorktown, Virginia, in 1781. We Americans effectively won our independence with a hell of a lot of sacrifices.

Even after 1781, the fighting continued well into 1783. Great Britain would have probably still owned the US today if they hadn't been so damn greedy and put a stranglehold of taxation on the colonists to the point that everything they worked for was taken lock stock and barrel once a quarter like clockwork. This was taxation they saw no benefit from. The money was used lavishly to build palaces in the states and to ship home to Great Britain by the boatload.

I love history. It's incredibly important to me. I can tell you the story of the National Anthem, what happened with Betsy Ross, and that I cried when I saw a piece of the flag that remained that flew over Fort McHenry in Baltimore during the Battle of Baltimore. Because even after 1781, the United States had to keep fighting the British. There were whole generations of Americans that were born and died during this nation's formation. All they ever knew was invasions, defenses, and the endless construction and reconstruction of our homeland.

Francis Scott Key witnessed, out at sea, the entire British Navy attacking Baltimore and slaughtering thousands of Americans that day in 1812... and yet when a full night and day passed, the Fort still kept its American Flag flying.... which leds to the writing of the poem "The Battle of Baltimore" which was later transformed into the Star-Spangled Banner by Key on September 14th, 1814.

I mean can you imagine? The entire Brittish Navy bombing a singular fort way out on a peninsula and being unable to breach it or get it to stand down to stop the violence? Americans then had accents of all kinds and were from all nations worldwide but were united under one cause... to get free of British rule. Almost every country worldwide had at some point suffered the greed and drive of the monarchies of Europe, especially the Kings and Queens of GB.

Scotland suffered terribly for years and years, losing uprising after uprising, until to this day of those on native Scottish soil hardly remember much about life under the clans, especially in the highlands. Scottish culture was all but destroyed in Scotland, surviving only because people fled famine and the oppression of the British early on and retained their culture elsewhere before it was absolutely beaten and starved out of the native Scottish.

On April 14th, 1746 a full thirty years before the new colony across the sea signed their declaration of war - I mean independence - the battle of Culloden occurred where more than 8,000 well-armed redcoats struck down the starved and exhausted remains of the Jacobite army. This battle and its tragic loss of Scottish life spelled both the end of the Stuart Dynasty, and the end of the clans as Scotland knew them.

So when the British was faced with the uprising of the United States, they were arrogant, confident, and utterly sure they could smack us down. We fought back. We still fight back. And eventually, we rose to be as much of a world power, if not more so, than the EU.

So what does this have to do with anything cancel-culture-wise?

People are trying to rewrite history, tear down our monuments in the US, and say things like the 4th of July are not important. They've lost their ever-loving mind and any sense of patriotism over the true battles that happened in the formation of this country.

What-The-Fuck?!?!!?!?

Urban Dictionary defines canceling as "to dismiss something or somebody" and "to reject an individual or idea." Basically, if you don't like it, you cancel it by overwriting it or redirecting whatever narrative 'it' gives into something the canceler feels is more important. That sounds reasonable, right? Except someone's opinion is subjective and often counterintuitive to reality.

George Washington was a slave owner. Yes. So were a lot of people in that day and age. It was part of the cultural norm and as common as smoking or consuming copious amounts of alcohol when one's pregnant. And like those things, the culture shifted, more wars were fought and slaves were emancipated. I'm happy that happened formally and officially. I'm happy smoking has become an utter abhorred practice culturally. And I'm happy we educate those women who are pregnant about the dangers of alcohol and pregnancy because in my mind a fetus is just as subject to the whims of the mother as a slave is to the whims of a slave owner; even if that whim is death. Women say 'it's my body'. Slave owners say 'it's my property'. To me, there's virtually no difference, and an utter lack of respect on the part of both people for the sanctity of life.

I had to remind you of all this to really drive home how much this next part means to me. So, back to the win against cancel culture...

We have this group at work... they are called The Promise Team... I'm not even sure what they do. I know it involves bridging some sort of gap between managers and employees... or making the work environment more comfortable for employees. Actually, they might just be party planners and socialites. I don't really know or care. They do things like hang pride flags for pride month (though they ignored black history month?) and now evidently they are trying to cancel the 4th. They weren't even being discrete about it. Sometime last week these little table ads showed up in the lunchroom that praised Juneteenth to high heaven yet had an image of the 4th of July with a huge red X through it. I don't think they ran it through any of the higher-ups. I think they were just so ecstatic they were given permission to hang dollar store pride flags everywhere, that the inch they were given was turned into a mile.

Well, I don't know about you, but the image of The 4th of July with a red X through it makes some sort of switch inside of me flip. It goes through stages too... first pain, then absolute rage, then frustration that someone who could do this has no true understanding of what it took to create this country. It's completely ignorant and selfish. It wasn't just a signed document in 1776. The British didn't hand us over this hellishly rich country without a fight. It was a whole generation's lifetime of bloody battles to make this country happen.

There's plenty of room for new holidays. I'm glad people want to celebrate new ones. They are important to a lot of people. But you absolutely don't do it by shitting on an existing holiday that is critical to our nation's history. I couldn't believe these signs stayed out on tables for three days until someone pointed them out to the management - that don't dine in the lunchroom btw - and at that point, they were all immediately removed. It was the right thing to do... not because Juneteenth isn't important, but because cancel culture sucks.

Blacks get a whole month, now so do gays. What about women and suffrage? We get one singular day on Feb 15th called Anthony Day in honor of Susan B. Anthony - 2/15 is her birthday - and nothing more. Has anyone ever even heard of Anthony Day? It certainly isn't a federal holiday. Why not? The people in power don't want to give it any attention and certainly don't want a full month dedicated to women's history. It's eclipsed by Valentine's Day anyhow.

And what about Native Americans? We get a whole lot of nothing, yet we are forced to endure Columbus Day as a federal holiday. And we all know Columbus wasn't even the first person to discover the new world. Vikings were here hundreds of years before them. So forgive me if I won't shit on The 4th in favor of Juneteenth... which originated in Texas btw... by a state which most liberals equate with racism. I won't shit on anything in favor of anything else for that matter.

I'm glad the table signs got taken down. It was a victory against cancel culture. And I hope on various holidays - Memorial Day coming to mind first and foremost - that people actually take a moment to educate themselves on why we are even having that holiday rather than just take it as a free day off work and a party weekend or whatever.

I also hope that the people all gungho for today as a holiday understand that we can't celebrate the liberation of Americans in a freedom day if we still have an estimate of 1.3 victims of modern slavery for every thousand in the country... so with our population being 328.2 million people in the US at the posting of this scrap... that means 30 million + people are slaves in the US today. That is a hell of a lot of slaves, people. And these people pushing Juneteenth are turning a blind eye which to me means they are furthering other agendas beyond emancipation. So why are we celebrating a holiday about freedom when there are still people that are not free? Why don't we dedicate a holiday on FREEING SLAVES or at least make the new one partially about that?

That's not even speaking to the countries that openly accept slavery like India, China, and a whole host of others. It's not right. It's not even a little right. Slavery, or its more modest title of human trafficking these days, is still an abysmal practice that should be on everyone's agenda to eradicate in the US and in the entire world. Though, honestly, if the people being trafficked aren't VIPs, no one that can do anything about it is going to care. So very few folks care about the impoverished, the downtrodden, the socially insignificant like runaways, snatched youth, and those fleeing bad situations only to stumble into worse ones. And anyhow, the people that can and do move mountains to help are being canceled themselves - the law enforcement nationwide. Its a bitter ugly circle driven by fools.

Do you care? Because I do... very deeply, about all of it. And I care about the 4th of July. You can't prioritize these things by elevating one and canceling the other.

[Gossamer]

Small Update

I'm sorry I haven't been online much this week. WA is experiencing a heat dome and our temps are soaring into the 100+s... tomorrow its supposed to be 110 at my house. I've been working long hours due to coworkers on vacation and I'm just dragging my ass at the end of the day.

I already have a ton of overtime this week and I have to go in and work a full day tomorrow by myself.... on cement that with the outside air temps 110 will be more like 130. I'm fairly sure I'll be close to a 70 hr work week. I will be back online sunday hot and heavy... and make sure everyone is replied too etc. Later in the week its supposed to cool down... but I have no idea if that will happen. I've never seen my rainy 70 degrees in June state be this hot and I'm not used to it.

Everyone be well and enjoy the festivities if you are in or around the Pacific Northwest. We're going crazy over the weather out here. Meanwhile... I just have to get through tomorrow and everything will be back to normal.