OOCI'm very sorry for not replying for some time. I got a little preoccupied for a while!"R-Really," she said softly, eyes rising up to look at the woman, "I haven't been robbed, beaten, or cheated." Andalusia gave her a soft, understanding smile. She felt so calm in the hot springs, that it was almost as if the warm, steaming waters had melted off all her insecurities. "Neither am I insane," she added with a chuckle. She wondered - would being honest with this woman be a good idea? The information wouldn't destroy either one of them, and may even provide a connection for them to become friends. She took a deep breath and then sighed. It was now or never, and perhaps the weight on her chest may even lighten if she confessed to her problems.
"I tend to... I tend to have nightmares, from time to time, related to my past. C-Coupled with bouts of anxiety and-and, insecurities..." she wanted to huddle her legs closer to her chest, bury her face in her knees, and grumble. She felt a blush creep up her cheeks, but assumed it was from the heat. Her past wasn't really something to be embarrassed about. There was a pregnant pause, and for a moment, Andalusia's mind wandered. Why weren't there others coming to the hot springs? Work was the only excuse she could think of. She quickly returned to reality and turned to the woman once more."I believe that... a child should be exposed to the, the harshness of the world as e-early as possible," she began, eyes locking with Zandelia's. "But, there are some things that they shouldn't, sh-shouldn't ever see," she faltered, her eyes shifting, "at least, n-not until they're older, more mature."
"I watched death take my loved ones away from me, one by one," she murmured, "a-and I know, many others have b-been able to stay st-strong even after seeing a l-lot of their, their loved ones pass away, die, be k-killed," she gulped, nervousness accumulating and locking up her throat. She took another deep breath. "B-But I... I was so young, and so fragile, so... so inexperienced. And, it was so slow, s-so gradual, the death..." she wanted to shut her eyes and block everything out. It was so painful to talk about, to hear herself say it. But she asked, she seemed to be listening, there was no stopping herself now. "P-Please, don't assume that I'm always like this," she said apologetically, "normally I'm fine, but when I have those nights..." she trailed off once more.
The fear of being misjudged or misunderstood flooded in her and made her stomach churn. Her face burned with an embarrassed blush, and she felt vulnerable and weak. This woman looked strong and sturdy, and she wished she could've met her when she was in a different state, a much more stable one. "My father meant the world to me. H-He raised me when my mother died, a-after giving birth to me," she gazed off into the distance, relishing the heat in her face, using it as her driving force to continue speaking. "We left Syliras to live in Zeltiva, with my grandfather's friend, wh-who was like an u-uncle to me," she added. The words spilled out so quickly and fluidly, no longer trembling, although occasionally stuttering. When she spoke of her family, she spoke with passion and love. They were the world to her. "They taught me everything," she smiled softly, "I read my uncle's books, m-my father taught me archery, horseback riding, self-defense... I learned so much!" her voice rose and her face lit up, her eyes twinkling with excitement at the memories. "I wasn't allowed outside, b-but it was okay, because I-I always had company. They were always with me, I was never alone, not even once."
And then, her smile faded and her face darkened once more. "My father got sick," she paused, her eyes lowering, "he got sick, a-and no matter... no matter wh-what we did, h-he just got w-worse and worse." She took yet another deep breath, and sighed loudly. The pain returned, and it felt twice as brutal as before. "I-I spent all my time, next to him, w-with, with him. B-But because of that, I watched him slip aw-away from me, from u-us, and..." she stopped herself. The tears begged to come out, but she gently splashed her face with spring water. She wasn't going to cry in public, and especially not in front of this woman. "I-It was a horrible sight, to s-see him die before my very eyes," she said. Tears welled up quite a bit, but it fell down her cheeks along with the droplets of spring water, leaving off her chin unnoticed.