11 Spring 512AV
So here I am, on the thresh hold of my new life that I never thought I would experience, or even deserve for that matter. Yet....here I am walking the streets of a city that is supposed to be my new home, that will give me the chance to figure out who I am but.....I am alone. I suppose that is only natural for someone of my race, and I don't mind being by myself, in fact I prefer it sometimes, to remain in that shroud of anonymity that I seem to covet as of late. BUt sometimes.......I wish that I had someone that I could talk to, share my ideas and beliefs with...someone who can help me find my path. The fact is I miss Nasim, the only family that I have left since.....
No, I will not write of it, not even in my most personal thoughts. The wound is still fresh after two years, and so is the ever present guilt. It was my fault, all my fault and I....NO! I will not write of it, not yet!
Perhaps I am not meant to find help in this desolate city, that seems to be full of mercenaries and thugs, and people who are more downtrodden than most. Perhaps I am meant to continue carrying this burden that I bear as I have before, and forge my own path and create my own way of life.
Because the path to redemption is only big enough for one.
Kalila