[The Injury Ward] A Helping Hand (Sahashkalila)

[Shadowfang]

85th of Spring 512AV

Shadowfang trudged toward the injury ward, too grumpy to run, to angry to fly. His mood had nothing to do with why he was going into the ward, yet at the same time, had everything to do with his injury. He was clutching his bandage-bound left forearm, squeezing it and applying pressure in different places. His left hand had stopped working. It just cut out! Quit working! Ceased functioning! He could not move it and the numbness in his arm had increased so that there was not even a tingle left. He punched the useless hand and felt nothing. Punched again. Nothing. He rubbed the bandaged area and his arm all the way up to his shoulder. His sense of feeling still existed above his elbow, but that was the only good sign he could find.

He stumbled into the ward, still clutching his palm. Petch! he thought, trying to keep from screaming. Petch! Petch! Petch! It was useless. No matter how hard he tried, he could not make his fingers move. No matter where he pushed, no matter where he scratched, he could not feel anything. He felt himself begin to grow from grumpy to frantic; from angry to raging. He decided to try one final test. He began focusing on moving djed through his arm trying to feel it flow trough his veins. Nothing. He tried to open a portal using a gesture and the djed he hoped was in his left hand. He concentrated for the usual thirty seconds, forty seconds, a chime, two chimes. Nothing. He could not take it anymore. His anger and emotions built up inside him until, in one large burst, he released them.

He let out a roar; loud, feral, raging, angry, impossibly so. He out all his emotions into his voice as he screamed and brought his hand up. His rational brain was no longer in control, his body fueled by his hatred for himself, his power, his useless hand. He threw his arm to the side and slammed his numb hand against the hard wooden wall. 

Nothing.

[Sahashkalila]

It was another long day in the injury ward for Kalila, her body tired from the never ending job that was required of healer, along with the cold seeping into her bones. What she most wanted was a rest, to lay down on one of the straw mattresses and just sink into a deep sleep like some of the other patients that were resting peacefully. She almost caved in and allowed herself to sink down onto the mattress that was next to her, but the thought of slumbering while others were in turmoil kept her going, her mantra that kept her moving throughout the day.

Her thoughts were then interrupted by the arrival of someone that she did not expect into the injury ward, someone in fact that she had seen but never spoken to, and in fact was a tad bit nervous to speak to. It was a male Zith, another member of her adopted family that had seemed to wrap its own peculiar strings around her heart, as much as she would never admit. His entrance was noisy and alarming, his blood curdling yell ringing throughout the room and causing quite a bit of distress to the other healers and patients. No one seemed willing to approach and angry Zith, their faces filled with fear and anger as she looked about the room. She sighed to herself and removed her veil, tying it about her waist as she hurried over to him. This seemed to be her task today.

She reached him quickly, cringing as he slammed his hand into the wall next to him. She did not know how to deal with a Zith, knowing them to be dangerous...but this one was a member of her family, and perhaps they weren't all bad? Kind of like me I suppose, she mused. Concern overwhelmed the thought of her own safety, and she placed a gently, but firm hand on his chest, making soothing noises as she did so. "Calm down, calm down. Everything isss going to be alright,"she said softly, her voice calm as she kept her hand on his chest, marveling slightly at the fine hairs she felt on her skin. "I would not ssuggesst sslamming your hand againsst the wall if it iss injured, that would defeat the purposse of you being here,"she said with a slight bit of humor in her voice, a small smile on her face. Perhaps she could reach him through humor, at least she hoped that she could.

[Shadowfang]

A firm, but gentle hand pressing against his chest dragged him back into reality. He glared at the hand's owner, snarling through barred fangs. His entire body shook and shivered with anger, but the soothing voice and the calming touch began to take effect on him. His breathing began to deepen and the shaking slowed. He closed his eyes for a second. When they opened, he saw a face that he had seen around the camp and had even planned to talk to, but never got around to. It was the Crimson's very own doctor, Sahashkalila.

"I-I... I..." He stuttered as his voice became filled with all the anger and fear that was pent up inside him. Fear of what? Not of Sahashkalila and her soothing touch and voice of course; more a fear of what could have happened to him if he had not met her. He shook his head and took deeper breaths, trying to regain some semblance of composure. "I cannot... feel. I cannot feel my hand." He grasped the bandaged appendage in his right hand and held it out in front of her face. It hung there limply, like the broken piece of a twig hanging off the rest of the branch.

"It will not move. No matter how hard I try I cannot get it to move." His voice began to get shaky again. He felt a few hot, angry tears begin to form at the corners of his eyes, but he blinked them away and hoped that she did not notice. He looked into the healer's eyes. They were soft, kind, and somehow comforted him even more. Still holding his numb left hand in front of him, he placed his good hand on her arm and squeezed, not wanting to lose her calming touch. When he next spoke, he almost whimpered. "What do I do?"

[Sahashkalila]

Kalila jumped a bit at his snarl but she stayed where she was, fairly positive that he wouldn't harm her in the middle of an injury ward. She let him calm down on his own, keeping her hand gently on his chest since he seemed to be able to focus more with her being there. He was still obviously distressed though, his words broken as he tried to convey to her what was wrong, the emotions clear in his voice and face. She kept the small smile on her face though, letting him tell her what he needed to.

The hand that was shown to her worried her a bit, especially when he said that he could not feel it. It sounded like it was either broken or had some kind of nerve damage, which was something she had never encountered even though she had read about briefly. If it was only broken, she would have been able to set it and it would heal on its own. But he should have been in pain if it was broken, which was why the situation worried her even more. She did not know what could cause nerve damage unless something traumatic had happened, such as severe burns, but he was not burned either. Her brows furrowed slightly before she smoothed her expression, not wanting to upset him any more than he already was. She felt as if she was dealing with a small child, and she briefly wondered how old the creature in front of her was, her heart going out to him.

She gently moved her arm from his grasp, sliding her hand into his good one, mindful of his claws. She squeezed his hand gently with her own and smiled up at him, wanting him to know that everything was going to be alright. "Well, what you can do iss come with me to a bed and we can figure thiss out together, yess?"she asked, gently beginning to pull him towards one of the empty beds.

[Shadowfang]

He followed her, allowing her to pull him along toward an empty bed. When he sat, he was surprised at how much he sank into the soft surface. So this was a bed? He could not remember that last time he had slept on a bed, or even if he had ever slept on a bed in his life. Kalila's voice caught his attention and he looked at her again. He decided that he liked her, she was kind, she was gentle, and if he weren't so upset her smile would have been contagious. He tensed a little when he realized that she was telling him to take his bandages off. He almost never took them off, always trying to hide his weakness from others, trying to keep his ability a secret. But... she would need to tee what was wrong with him if she was going to fix him. With a sigh, he put a hand on the bandages and began unwrapping his arm.

At the first two rotations around his arm, there was no change. Under the first section of the bandages, there remained normal fur and skin, nothing that seemed wrong. Then, the third rotation and thus the second part of his wrappings came off. What was revealed to Kalila was a sight that Shadowfang had not wanted anyone to ever see. His forearm was covered in horrendous scars and, the further he unwrapped his arm, the worse they seemed to get. His arm had not been marked by blade, by claw, or by fang. Patches of fur and flesh were missing, as if they had simply disappeared from all existence. Some of the pockmarks were deep, some shallow. As he unwrapped his hand, he revealed even more wounds. While his hand had been left generally untouched by whatever had caused the scars on his forearm, there were two long scars on his hand, one on the back and one on his palm.

He lay the bandages on the bed and rested his mangled forearm in his right hand. It had been so long since he had last taken the well used bandages off and the feeling of his own skin and scar tissue on his fur unsettled him. It was a sight that he was all too used to but he could not help but stare at it. He silently held it in front of Kalila once more, looking up at her as if to say "can you fix it?"

[Sahashkalila]

As he began to unwrap the bandages from his arm, her first impression was that it wasn't all that bad. But as he moved higher, her eyes widened in surprise as she looked down at him, the sight before her unsettling. The damage was....extensive and unnatural, something that she was not expecting. There were pieces of him that were just, gone, as if they had never even been there. There was no sign of blood or that any tissue had been torn or ripped away, which made the nature of his injury all the more puzzling. She took a deep breath and pulled a stool up close to the bed so she could sit and examine his hand, taking it gently in hers once she had sat down.

She stared at his mangled arm silently for a few minutes, not exactly sure what to do. The scars on his arm troubled her, but not nearly as much as the pieces of flesh and fur that were seemingly missing. There were no bite marks nor was the flesh jagged....it was just simply gone. Of course none of this explained why he could not feel anything with it. She then gently began to press her fingers along his flesh, feeling to see if the bones were intact. He didn't seem to have anything broken, all of the bones felt intact as she continued to press her fingers along his arm. "Thiss wound iss not natural,"she said with a furrowed brow, her worry clearly showing. "There are no ssignss of blood lossss and it doess not look ass if you have been in a fight....." She then looked up at him, wondering exactly what had happened to cause this.

"How did you get injured...,"she began before she paused, realizing that she did not know his name. "I'm ssorry, forgive me, I do not know your name." She smiled a bit at him, a small blush rising in her cheeks from embarrassment at her slight.

[Shadowfang]

"I am called Shadowfang. I know that you are called Kalila." he said quietly. He felt much calmer now that she was trying to help him. As he watched her hands go about their busy prodding at his arm, he remembered back on the rumors revolving around the healer. Some spoke of how she could heal anything, some whispered about how she may not be wholly human, and some attempted to discredit the first two. Human or not, Shadowfang did not care just as long as she could heal his arm; just as long as the first rumor was true. 

"I was stabbed through with a dagger here." he said, forcing his Common and pointing to the twin scars on his palm and back of his hand. He paused and thought before continuing. Was it really safe to tell her why the rest of his arm was scarred so badly? He glanced around the large room. This was the Spires, not Sunberth. Magic would be more widely accepted here so he would not alphabet to worry about being attacked. Then again, if Kalila or anyone else who saw and heard him explain were to let it slip once they returned to the city of anarchy, he would have hell to pay. He let a small sigh escape his lips. He would have to tell her exactly how his injuries were caused if he wanted her to heal him. Besides, his secret was probably safe with her. 

He hunched over and held his right hand open, close to his body to shield what he was about to do from any other's view, and focused on the space above his palm. Thirty seconds passed and a minuscule point of blackness appeared. He used more djed and the portal expanded, still so small that he could close his hand around it, but a visible portal nonetheless. "This." he said darkly. "A year ago I lost control of... this... A lot of these portals started opening inside my arm and took pieces of it away. Every time one opened, another piece of my arm would disappear." he explained as he stared into the dark of the small doorway into the Void. He closed it as quickly as he could after he had said his piece, fearing that anyone who had seen it might not like the fact that he knew such a dangerous magic.

[Sahashkalila]

"It iss a pleassure to meet you officially Sshadowfang,"she said with a warm smile, not surprised that he already knew who she was. Things seemed to travel fast in their little family and of course they had all seen her shift on the journey there, or at least most of them did. She had tried to be as discreet as she could about it. She shook her head slightly as her mind wandered, dark curls slithering over her shoulder as she held his hand in hers, watching as he pointed out the two long scars on his palm. She didn't normally ask personal questions when she treated others, knowing that others valued their privacy and she respected that. But sometimes, severe injuries required her to ask, and this was one of those times.

She stared at him in confusion as he hunched over, watching as he seemed to focus on the palm of his good hand intently and she watched it too. After a fee moments, a small black ball appeared in his hand and she gasped, surprise washing over her. Magic. She had heard of magic, but had never seen it practiced. Magic was a dangerous element, tricky and unpredictable in untrained hands....and apparently Shadowfang had paid the price for it. As soon as it appeared it was gone, and she listened to his explanation, her heart sinking with every word. She did not think she could help him, and her face fell as she looked at his arm once again.

"Sso much pain, sso much ssacrifice, all for a dangerousss talent,"she murmured sadly, almost to herself. She reached out and took his good hand in hers, squeezing it gently and looking into his crimson eyes, her own reflecting the pain she felt for him. She did not think there was much she could do for him, but she would try for the sake of trying. "I would like to do a few tesstss Sshadow, to ssee what you can feel and what you can not. I will need to make a few cutss along your arm....will you be ok with that?"she asked softly. She would not do anything that he would be uncomfortable with.

[Shadowfang]

He looked away and have a small nod at her poetic words. It was almost storybook, the amount of drama that seemed to ooze from the situation. He tensed for a moment at her request. He did not very much like the idea of a blade slicing through his flesh, even if he would not be able to feel it. He had killed before. Had cut flesh, tore muscle, and tasted blood. He had been wounded too, stabbed through the hand and the wing, cut with blades, and torn apart by voids, but those had all been instantaneous and in the heat of the moment. The thought of willingly sitting still while a cold blade slowly sliced into his skin and muscle... He shivered.

However, Kalila probably knew what she was doing and she would need to run her tests to find out what she needed to do. Right? Right. After a few more moments of silent apprehension, Shadowfang finally gave her a slow nod, giving her the go ahead to do what she was going to do. Despite all his mental preparation, all his past experiences of violence, blood, and death, he began to quiver. His shaking was small and might be unnoticeable to most, but it was there. Perhaps he simply was not in the "mood" to see blood, or maybe seeing his own just unnerved him. He squeezed her hand, just to feel some comfort or some sympathy from another person, and closed his eyes. He could not feel what was happening, so maybe it would not be so bad if he could not see it either. 

[Sahashkalila]

Kalila waited patiently as he came to a decision, not going to push him into something that he wasn't quite comfortable with. Emotions seemed to dance across his face as she watched him, finally seeing him give a small nod towards her. She could feel the subtle shake of his body as he squeezed hers and her heart immediately went out to him, not caring that that this creature in front of her was one of the most feared races. What she saw in front of her was a creature that was experiencing real emotion, just like any person who was faced with a situation beyond their control. He was frightened of what was going to happen, or perhaps what she may not be able to do, and Kalila squeezed his hand back.

She then gently removed her hand from his, taking both of her hands and framing his face, her delicate fingers rubbing soothing circles along his jaw and cheek bone. His eyes were closed tightly and she leaned forward, not caring if it was perhaps a bit to personal. Perhaps it was what he needed. Her forehead was pressed against his, her eyes closed as well and she spoke softly, for his ears alone. "Hey, it isss going to be alright. Let your mind be a peace for awhile Shadow, you are in a place of healing." She stayed like that for a few moments with him before she pulled away and pressed her lips to his forehead, like she would for a young child. It seemed to have some kind of effect on him, because his shaking stopped, but his eyes remained tightly shut. She then pulled her hands away and moved to hold his injured arm with one had while the other picked up a scalpel, noting how uncomfortable he seemed with it all. She decided to change her plan and squeezed his hand in reassurance. "I'm going to sstart Sshadow, let me know when you feel ssomething ok? I do not wissh to hurt you,"she said softly before he nodded once more and she began.

She decided to just pinprick his arm, keeping the dots close as she slowly made her way up his arm. There was no reaction, and she began to frown, the sadness she was feeling inside of her only growing. She had just reached his elbow when he jumped as she pricked him, and her frown only deepened. How did the feeling just stop in one part of the arm but not in the other? It was something that her mind could not seem to comprehend, and she began to realize that she was going to need advice and help.....and hopefully the one who could help was not having one of his "spells" today.

"I will be honesst with you and ssay that I am trouble by your injury, it iss caussing me much disstresss. I...am going to have to assk Jorg, becausse I do not know what to do,"she said softly, taking a wet rag and gently wiping away the small pinpricks of blood that were along his arm.

NoteJust wanted to state that I did ask Shadow if I could mod his reactions in this post and he agreed, saved a bit of time instead of letting him react each time she poked him