by Cyrah on May 24th, 2010, 4:05 pm
“Just shut up,” she snapped at him, as she twisted away. “Just don't talk to me, ever.”
And then she hurried into the little room they kept as a wash room, slamming the door shut between them. He'd hear her slide the bolt home, locking herself within, and then nothing.
She hadn't even taken a candle with her. Not that it mattered to her; she could see well enough in pitch darkness. Though her vision blurred as she sat down on the floor, everything wavering and wobbling, and that's how she knew she'd begun to cry. Wiping at the tears smattering her cheeks, she bent over with her head in her hands and tried to remember how to breathe, and how to fight, and most of all how to be so angry that the rest of you went numb. How to hate so completely that there wasn't any room for anything else.
Cyrah didn't know much about emotions and people, and especially what the two of them had to do with one another, but she knew well enough that you couldn't trust either. People would cut you open and hurt you deep, and your feelings would let them if you weren't careful. That's what her Mama had always said. She'd tried so hard to keep her distance, to hold onto all the hatred she could, and she knew it was her fault, knew she had nobody to blame but herself, as she felt her heart breaking into a thousand pieces. Instead of accepting that blame, though, she shoved it deep down and chose instead to blame Clement because he was convenient. And it was easier to hate him and go on living than it was to hate herself.
Thus resigned, she curled up on the floor of the wash room and pressed her cheek to the cool, stone surface, willing herself to sleep. |
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Last edited by
Cyrah on June 11th, 2010, 3:37 pm, edited 1 time in total.