Solo [Suvan Shore] Lesson Number 1

[Katelyn Marks]

11th, Spring, 515 AV

"Why are we doing it here?" Katelyn asked as Garrison followed her patron's horse down onto the sand where the Suvan Sea's surf rolled up the shore with a loud sigh. The sky was slightly overcast today but the temperature was pleasant. Salt was heavy in the air here, and the groan of the sea was rhythmic and constant in the background. Ser Moore reined in his mare and dismounted, then turned to his squire and smiled up at her.

"Come here and you'll see why," the knight said, so Katelyn climbed down from her saddle to join him. Both of them tired their horses to a fallen tree where the shore met the incline back up to grass and trees, and she followed the mage a ways down the sand where he sat by the edge of the ocean's reach and beckoned her to do the same. The mage-squire folded her legs beneath her and sat directly across from him like he preferred. The Suvan was on her left, and the mountains rose up in the distance on her right.

Far off in the water she could see a few ships bobbing on the waves, either fishing or carrying cargo, she didn't know which. Their white sails were like far-off clouds, and in the distance they seemed to be barely crawling across the wide blue waters--though it was more gray today, with the sun rarely poking out from behind the rain accumulating in the sky. Ser Moore placed his pack between them and opened it, drawing her attention away from the sea and back to what was in front of her.

"Go ahead and set up our lunch. I'll explain," he said, and the squire rummaged inside for their food. She placed a few preserved fruits on a folded cloth, then arranged their breads and cheeses and fresh meats beside them. "When I was still living in Zeltiva, I had a professor in the School of Djed that taught me an easier way to fall into a meditative state," Ser Moore began as she placed two clay cups on the sand and filled them with water from her waterskin. "Everyone is different and some find it harder than others to empty their minds, but I thought it would be a good way to introduce you to it."

Katelyn went ahead and took a sip from her cup, and her patron picked up a piece of fruit to pop in his mouth. Once he was finished chewing, he took a small drink and motioned to the ocean.

"I want you to listen to it carefully. The lull of the waves, and how constant it is," the mage instructed. "No, close your eyes," he commanded when she tried to look out at the gray water. Her eyelids slipped shut and she leaned back a little, resting her weight more comfortable on her hands in the sand. "I want you to try and empty your thoughts. Slow your breathing in time with the waves and let the sound fill you." He spoke quietly now, barely above a low murmur.

"Why do I need to learn how to do this again?" she asked, and her patron instantly hushed her with a sharp hiss through his teeth and a finger to his lips. Her eyes were still closed, so the sudden sound made her jump, and she fell into a startled silence. The ocean crawled its way up the wet track of sand it constantly followed and lapped at the tips of her fingers, chilling her hand. She pulled it out of the way, wiggling a little to the right to avoid the water's reach.

"I'm going to guide you to discovering and harnessing your Djed," Ser Moore explained, not for the first time. "To do so I need you to empty all of the thoughts of self-doubt from your over-active head, and focus. Now listen to the water, and let yourself drift." He ended on a soft, quiet note again, and Katelyn took a deep breath in as a wave rolled in, then released it as it retreated.

[Katelyn Marks]

"In through the nose, out through the mouth," the mage corrected gently, and Katelyn instantly did as she was told. Eyes closed, she listened to the waves hum and churn against the sand. "Try counting slowly in your head as your breath. Set a rhythm, and stick to it," Ser Moore urged softly, noticing the concentrated strain on her face. She took a slow breath in as another wave rolled in. One, two three, four, wave retreating, exhale through mouth. One, two three, exhale, hold. New wave, two, three, four, exhale.

Garrison nickered loudly from where the horses were tied, drawing her instantly back to the now. Her eyes snapped open and she looked over her shoulder at the stallion, who stared at her curiously across the sand. Ser Moore's mare was watching, but with less interest. She was used to this sort of thing. Her stallion on the other hand needed to learn patience.

"Don't focus on him. You have to ignore the outside. If you let the birds and the wind and the trees distract you, you'll be at this for bells," her patron scolded. A little annoyed now, Katelyn closed her eyes again with a little scowl on her face and shifted her attention back to the waves. I'm no good at "quieting me mind", she thought to herself in exasperation, but knew he wouldn't want to hear it. It was one of those thoughts of self-doubt he wanted her to get rid of. Katelyn's first breath was more a sigh, and she could practically feel the mage shaking his head.

"Concentrate," he ordered, and she dove back in. The squire allowed herself to get back into the slow rhythm of breathing, and after a few chimes worked out the stiffness in her muscles. She sat upright again but slouched a little, trying to ease the tautness in her back and shoulders. As the waves washed out, she exhaled slowly, relaxing a little more with every passing chime. The sound of the ocean filled her ears, and Katelyn related it to something akin to the sensation of attention straying and eyes glazing over, looking far into the distance but seeing nothing.

Her mind buzzed with the sound of waves, and her chest expanded with every breath. She heard everything, but nothing really at the same time.

"Look inward at yourself," Ser Moore coaxed, drawing her attention slightly. Her brows furrowed in frustration, but the knight was ever-patient. "Keep breathing," he soothed, and Katelyn took another long, slow breath. "Remember what I said. Djed is everything." Kate wasn't sure how she was supposed to find the link. She knew who she was, didn't she? She was a squire, and she'd grown up at the Mithryn Outpost. Her family didn't support her interest in magic, and she'd moved to Syliras on a sour note with all of them. They hadn't even sent a letter yet.

She was lonely and homesick and afraid of what she might learn from her new patron. Her breathing fell out of rhythm, but the redhead quickly tried to amend the missed beat. Her next inhale was longer, slower, and as the wave retreated she let the air leave her, and with it some of the tension that had built back up in her posture. Katelyn didn't regret the decision to move to the city, or transfer positions. In fact, she realized it was exactly what she wanted, no matter how anyone else felt.

[Katelyn Marks]

Katelyn hit the wall so hard that she visibly flinched. The sudden contact with the very core of herself produced a sudden urge to sneeze, cough, and itch herself all at once. It tickled fiercely for a moment, and when her eyes snapped open with the surprise of it all, she gasped for air like she'd been holding her breath for a bell. Her chest heaved and her mind swam with a fleeting sense of pure clarity--like she almost had the answer to everything but someone plucked it straight out of her brain. Kate grabbed her cup and took a long drink, emptying the contents and filling it up again just to drown the second portion of water in one drought.

When she looked at her patron the mage was smiling, and after a long pause, the squire felt the corners of her lips turn up too.

"See? Self-doubt doesn't get you anywhere at all. Best to just discard it altogether and leap into everything with confidence. Even if you don't really know what you're looking for." Katelyn rubbed the goosebumps that had risen all along her arms, and shivered despite the lack of a cold wind. "What did it feel like?" the knight asked, and for a moment she was at a loss for words.

"It felt like a lot of different things all at once. Not all of them pleasant, but not all unpleasant either," she said uncertainly, and he nodded.

"You'll learn to sort through everything and harness it when you want, how you want. The first touch tends to be a little overwhelming. That's common. I relate it to walking through a dark hallway feeling along the walls, and suddenly smacking nose-first into a door. But once you learn where the hallway is at, you can go back and memorize every inch of it, and open that door whenever you want." Katelyn was surprised by how well she understood his imagery, and found herself nodding thoughtfully as she mulled over what had just happened.

"Now, I have another experiment for you," he said, and instantly had all of his student's attention once more. "I want you to open that door, and focus on how you see the world. Me, you, everything. Don't just think about who you are. Really look at yourself, and try to see the things that are below the surface." Katelyn's heart was pounding again, more out of excitement than fear, and when she closed her eyes again it took a painfully long time to get back into the calm rhythm of quieting her nerves and mind. "Breathe slowly," her patron's voice guided as she tried to empty herself and find the hallway.

[Katelyn Marks]

She felt her way slowly through the dark, on hands and knees at first, then crawling to her feet when she felt the door in front of her. Her heart was pounding and her focus was acute with adrenaline and curiosity. Kate's fingers felt for an opening, but there was nothing. She pushed experimentally, but it didn't budge. The squire tried again, with the same results. Frustrated now, she pushed hard. The door creaked, but stopped. Katelyn slammed herself against the barrier, once, twice, three times, and suddenly it fell away, toppling over.

Warmth washed through her and she opened her eyes, feeling lightheaded and suddenly overwhelmed by the sensations pouring through. Her patron reached out and grabbed both of her hands, and she looked at him in fright.

"Don't worry. I'm here. Don't let it flood you. Focus on it. Make it do want you want. It is you. Don't be afraid of yourself." His words were like an anchor, and despite the humming through her body she felt her heart slow a few beats. "Now look at me. Really look at me. What do you see?"

Katelyn knew he didn't quite mean what the question initially sounded like. She knew he wanted her to look deeper than the surface, but at first the squire was slow to act. Kate looked at his dark skin and warm brown eyes. His closely cropped black hair and a trimmed goatee that was dusted with the faintest of premature gray hairs. She looked at their hands, how they contrasted starkly in color, shape, and texture. His fingers had a few old burn scars--mishaps with Reimancy during his feistier younger years. His palms were paler, creamier, though not nearly as white as her own.

The redhead pulled her hands from his comforting grasp and rubbed her eyes viciously, feeling frustrated. She looked at her own hands now--at the freckles dusting her light skin, the chewed fingernails that suffered when she was nervous or deep in thought, and the old childhood scars from life at the Outpost. What was below? She thought she knew herself pretty well, but reluctantly understood there were things she probably didn't--or didn't want to. She was still aware of her Djed humming through her body, fluttering along with her heartbeat and filling every inch of her--every curve and bend from head to toe.

"Use your eyes," Ser Moore urged firmly, giving her another verbal push. "Look between the lines."

Katelyn blinked rapidly and tried to focus. Her eyes began to water with the effort and unfamiliar sensation that felt like it was swelling inside her skull. Her head felt light and fuzzy, and she blinked the tears away. The world blurred and she rubbed her eyes, blinking hard to try and correct her vision.

"Stop fighting it," her patron ordered, pulling her hands away from her face and holding them in front of her eyes instead, filling her vision with both of their fingers. More tears swelled, but it wasn't from a desire to cry. As they trickled down her cheeks and her eyelids fluttered, the world shifted in a haze, and as if a curtain suddenly fell, things were clear again. Everything was a swirl of color. Green, blues, whites, and every color in between. The auras swarmed her, choking her and overwhelming her senses. Her patron shook her and she heard his muffled voice as if through a closed door, then suddenly a sharp sting on her cheek.

As the world snapped back into focus, she saw his face clearly, ringed with a halo of dusky blue. He'd slapped her she suddenly realized, but was too startled to say anything.

"Now look at me," he said more gently, eyes apologetic. "What can you see? Just look at me. Don't try too much at once."

[Katelyn Marks]

She struggled a moment to decipher what she was seeing. There were a lot of little things at once. As she took a breath, her nose and mouth was filled with a taste and smell of the ocean--more prevalent than just sitting by the Suvan like they were. It was as if she'd taken the salt water into her mouth and swallowed it, but without the urge to throw up. It didn't leave a bad taste in her mouth, and her face twisted with curiosity, not disgust.

"What is that?" she asked in confusion, not understanding the sensations.

"My aura," the mage explained, and the blues swirled with a warm glow like sunlight filtering through water. As it mingled with her own aura, she felt the pride radiating through it. Katelyn smiled and blushed under his glow, unable to feel anything for a quick breath other than happiness. "Everyone perceives them differently. What did you see--or feel?"

"I smelled and tasted the ocean. And I felt how proud you were," Kate explained a little breathlessly. "I could see the color change, and it moved like it was alive." She watched the smokey cloud of aura shift around him, then quickly looked at her own hands that were now resting on her lap. Greens danced and floated around her, and the colors shifted quickly--erratically along with her heartbeat and excited thoughts. The squire took in a deep breath through her nose, seeing if she could smell anything like with her patron's. There was a faint hint of something there, and she closed her eyes to partially drown out another sense.

It grew stronger then, and she recognized it as wet grass. Her hands automatically moved to the sand beside her, seeking to feel what wasn't physically there. When her fingers dug into the soft grit her eyes opened, and her disappointed tinged the green around her with a little brown. It fluttered there for a moment before wonder overtook her once more and the green flared brighter, overtaking the other color and blotting it out completely.

[Katelyn Marks]

"I want you to release now. Cut off the flow and let the auras fade. We'll continue again later. I don't want you to hurt yourself," Ser Moore said, drawing her attention away from the colors. The thought of Overgiving lept to the forefront of her mind, and the sudden fear dulled her aura considerably. It shivered in the air, reminding her of a cowering animal. She could smell her own fear in it. A sick smell that felt cold in her lungs. "Stop, don't scare yourself. I'm right here, it'll be fine. Just ease your grip on the auras, and let them go." Her patron snapped his fingers loudly, grabbing her attention. She looked at him and his face was stern, aura almost appearing harder around the edges now.

"Stop it. Breathe," the knight ordered, and Katelyn automatically took a deep breath. Her aura calmed, and she tried to make herself relax by going back into the rhythmic breathing pattern from earlier. Kate slowly and painstakingly wandered back to the deep parts of herself where the source of her Djed pulsed and flowed like a living river of energy. She felt her eyes begin to water again as she closed off the door, and fought against the enticing pull to keep it open.

An ache bloomed behind her eyes, and as the control on her Djed was suddenly severed, the world snapped back to what she could only consider were dull colors and harsh, rough edges. The ache exploded through her skull in a full on migraine, and Katelyn winced against the sharp pain. She grabbed her head protectively, holding it together as it split down the middle and was torn asunder.

She saw her patron's lips moving--could read her name on them--but all she heard was a ringing in her ears. He held up another cup of water for her a piece of fruit, but it took a chime for her to finally reach out and take them. The fruit tasted foul on her tongue but she chewed in anyway when Ser Moore urged in his muffled voice, and the water was bitter but cold and soothing at the same time. When the ringing finally died she relaxed a little, but squinted against the crushing pain in her head.

"Your first encounter with overgiving," the mage said with a humorless smile, and she nodded slowly, cradling the side of her head with one hand. "Let's get you back to the castle. The only thing that's going to make you feel better is some good old fashioned sleep." Getting there was a chore, and they had to keep the horses at a slow walk else she feared falling from the saddle, but when she finally collapsed into her bed that afternoon, it was the most intoxicating feeling. Katelyn slipped into a heavy sleep without much coaxing needed, and didn't wake until the next morning.

[Sayana]

Katelyn Skills: Skill EXP Observation +5 Horsemanship +1 Meditation +5 Cooking +1 Auristics +4 Endurance +2 Lores: Location: Suvan Shore Meditation: Breathing patterns Meditating to the waves of the ocean Mediation: Getting rid of self-doubt Unlocking the door to your personal djed Auristics: Auras can be sensed through sight, smell, taste, and touch Auristics: Seeing your own aura Auristics: Auras can quickly change Overgiving: Intense migraine Shield Points: Shield Points Earned Reason +3 Training +1 Patron Total: +4 Shield Points Overgiving : I think you played the overgiving aspect very well. As such, Katelyn has a severe migraine but after a long rest she is feeling better in the morning. Comments : I really enjoyed your interpretation of djed and auristics. You maintained a great sense of awe in the whole process and gave it a lot of depth. When I reached your last post I was actually a little sad that it was wrapping up but you finished it off concisely and in a satisfying way. Great job and thanks for paying such close attention to overgiving as well. Don't forget to edit/delete your grade request in the grade request thread. However, make sure to keep the link so that the DS can review graded threads with ease. If you have any questions or concerns about your grade please feel free to send me a message (like really, I’m all ears if you feel like I missed something). Enjoy.