Closed Good... let it flow through you...(Matthew)

[S'Essy]

Spring 20th, AV 515

S'Essy was waiting at the communal lounge are in the World's End Grotto. She was sitting there alone waiting for Matthew. She promised the man to help him deal with his emotions. But she had many problems. First, where to do that? Here? Somewhere else, in private in his or her room? Public wouldn't be that bad but private might have been better. But also being private... her lover wouldn't like that at all. Which brought her to the other problem.

How would she tell Markus? She didn't tell him yesterday because she was worried but she promised she won't keep anything from the Syliran Knight. She had to tell today... just how and when. Not the biggest problem ever but the Konti knew him well. Yeah probably here in the communal lounge was the best place after all, she didn't want to go anywhere anyway. It wasn't so much fun to walk all around since she was pregnant. Swimming didn't change though.

The third and biggest question how to help him? She gladly offered her help to the Harlot but how would she do it? S'Essy tried to think how could she make him feel his emotions when he so buried them. He didn't completely destroy them, so they were there but how to bring them up? Simply make him think of something when he experienced those? Probably. Maybe asking him what can cause those and do it? Also a possible way. She had to try.

S'Essy promised it. She was a Healer and also a Seer of Syna now and she promised to the Sun Goddess also to bring joy to everyone. She was just sitting silently close to the Sun. It felt better for her if Her lights were touching her skin. Without an expressions she was looking out from the window and was thinking deeply. Emotions... emotions... she had to explore the also maybe? Explore them so she would know how to make him experience the same. She just had to wait till he arrives then the 'fun' could begin.

[Matthew]

If he had known that their encounter had turned into something of a secret, things would have been different. It didn't matter that she planned to tell him. All that mattered was that she had not yet told him. It had nothing to do with being morally correct or incorrect, it was just a safety measure of sorts. He had no interest in being in the sights of a scorned lover. While he had not experienced it and only barely understood the concept of it, Matthew knew that love was a very powerful thing. That is why he had made it a rule. If he found out about any lovers, they would need to give their consent before any services could be offered. He didn't know about Marcus though, so in the end it didn't really matter. Would it have mattered anyway? After all, he wasn't the one offering the service this time. All of this was something very different.

Matthew would appear in the communal right on time, not a chime more and not a chime less. The presence of his Goddess buzzed at the very back of his mind, blessing him with a supernatural sense of time that sometimes proved useful. He was as sharply dressed as always, a simple fitted t-shirt clinging to his defined physique and subtly showing off some of the chiseled lines that were hidden beneath. Black britches were cinched with a leather belt, his feet slipped within boots. Blue eyes glanced around the small lounge for a few briefs ticks before finally spying S'Essy, offering her a polite smile as he headed her way.

Had she noticed the man in the corner who was leering at her in a very eager and lustful manner? The Harlot found it interesting that such a man was not deterred by the pregnant belly of the Konti, something that marked her as more complex than your average bar goer. Then again, most Konti were quite beautiful. Perhaps that was enough.

"Hello, S'Essy." His voice was soft, words carefully pronounced. "How are you today? Will we be staying here or did you have another location in mind? I have no preference." He slowly lowered himself into an open seat across from her, his gaze focused upon her own.

[S'Essy]

She bit her lips. This sounded so simple at first but thinking about it, it was complex and hard. How would she make that man feel anything when he was so cold. Her best option were bringing out the extreme ones, although the Konti didn't want to go on that direction. She felt she made a big deal out of nothing, but it was a big deal for her and for the harlot actually. She kept staring out, the Konti wanted to look up to Syna but she didn't want to go blind. Only silently speaking to the Goddess in Kontinese. "How should I open his eyes? "

Not a moment too late or too soon, Matthew have arrived. She turned to him from the window. Again, she had to admit his handsome features. He definitely stood out from the other men in the room. Did he know? Probably. Not that it mattered. As they made eye contact, he offered a polite smile. S'Essy did the same, offering a polite smile. She did mean that smile though, but did he? Or did he just do it because it was socially accepted. Or because she asked for it the last time? She didn't know and it wasn't the most important matter right now.

He took a seat as he said hello and asked his questions. Great questions, because she didn't know the answers to either of those. "Hello, hello Matthew. I guess I--" she stopped as she noticed she started to speak in Kontinese. The Healer quickly changed to Common. "I mean. Hi, I am fine. I guess. I'm just trying to put my thoughts together. How are you doing?" She had to quickly decide here or else where. S'Essy looked out, then back at the Harlot. She chose to stay there. "Yes, we'll be staying here."

She took a deep breath. It was probably time to start. But first things first, she needed to know what he really wanted. "I know, you told me yesterday but can I ask you again. What do you want exactly? What do you want me to do with it? What's your problem? " Simple questions but this was like healing a wound or illness. She needed to examine the problem first, ask the patient also. If she knew the problem, she could weed it out and solve it. This was only different only one way, that it was about the mind.

[Matthew]

Something was different. Something had changed. There was something out of place on the Konti but he couldn't exactly put a finger on what it was. His blue stare flicked quickly all over her face, down the front of her and then back up, brow furrowing as he tried to figure out what small change had been made since the last time they had interacted. It only took him a few more ticks to finally figure out what the difference was. Her eye had changed. He blinked, thoughts immediately switching to his own modified eyes. Was it something similar to his situation? Another tick quickly passed and then Matthew moved on, not wanting to mull over something that was likely impossible to immediately understand.

He craned his head to the side, tilting it a bit as she began to speak Kontinese, knowing the sound of the language but not understanding the words. She quickly seemed to notice her mistake, correcting it and continuing on in Common. "I am fine. Thank you for asking." His response was as polite and professional as ever, the Harlot relaxing back into his seat as she confirmed that they would be sticking to this location. Another glance was cast over at the odd one in the corner, Matthew noticing that he now seemed a bit disappointed. Perhaps he thought Matthew had made a move on S'Essy before he had a chance to. People were so very interesting.

Focusing on her next series of questions, Matthew answered without hesitation. "I almost completely lack the ability to understand and empathize with most emotions. I do feel them, but I cannot identify or describe most of them. However, there are times when I do believe that I understand what I am feeling. I have not quite found any sort of pattern to this, however. Most recently I have been feeling an excess of a particular emotion that I do understand. It seems to be anger. I find it unpleasant. If possible, I would like to get rid of all emotion entirely. However, if I recall, you believed that I must first come to understand them and experience them before I could make any progress towards nullifying them. That is what we have met here for, as well as to give you a chance to perhaps find another solution. I believe that is it. Does that summary sound accurate to you?"

She would be able to see that his eyes had glazed over a bit, the Harlot retreating into his own mind to call upon memory archives. There had been quite a bit of discussion at the bath house so he wasn't sure if he had remembered it all. It was also very possible that he had misunderstood a particular concept. Whatever the case, he would allow her to lead this meeting. He had no limits on what he was willing to try, just to see where she went with this.

[S'Essy]

Still she was only thinking about how could she do it. How could she bring out some emotions from him. This was tough and this circled in her head for so long. She was listening to his explanation again. She was only focusing on that and tried to find a solution just like healing. Focusing on the problem and try to find the most efficient way to solve it. Luckily here the healer didn't have to be that quick. It wasn't a real health problem... or not in that sense. Though mentally it was a serious problem in her opinion. She had to fix it... even if he thought otherwise.

He lacked the ability to identify emotions, to connect feelings. But he did feel them and that was the key to start to open the door. Sometimes he did understand them though. So she didn't have to start from the very beginning. An emotion he felt recently was anger... or he thought so. Another great point to start from. Yes, asking the patient about the problem always helped. He wanted to get rid of them, she couldn't help with that. Rather help him experience them and handle them seemed much more better. She wasn't sure if one could get rid of emotions entirely. At least without a divine help.

She was nodding while was thinking a bit. "Yes, that summary is accur..accu-ra-te." So he did feel them, he was just unsure what is what. He recently felt something unpleasant. Yes, this is it. But before that she looked around. They were in public and... she realized it was annoying. She liked people, she liked being around people but she was doing her job as a healer at that moment. She preferred for the patient's privacy. "Okay, I know I insisted this place but can we actually go somewhere private? You room or I don't know. Do you have any place you wanna go to? As a healer I like it better to be alone with my patients. " She gave the explanation right away for him to know.

Markus won't like it, but maybe she won't just mention that part. It wasn't easy for her that as well. But she swore an Oath to Rak'keli and Syna and she would keep that promise to them. If that's how then that's how. She offered a faint smile to Matthew before slowly standing up. It wasn't that easy anymore, carrying her child wasn't easy but it wasn't so bad either. She just had to stay fit and she would. "And while we are on our way, can you explain that experience you thought would be anger? What did you feel? What happened? How did you react? Everything you can share me with it."