[Languish's Scrapbook] For Eternity

[Languish]

Welcome to my Scrapbook.
As you probably know, I'm Languish, AS of Sahova.

In real life, I'm a high school senior taking a few college classes on the side as I work towards a career in TESOL (Teaching English to Speakers of Other Languages). I currently speak fluent French, semi-fluent Spanish, and very basic Japanese. I live in fuckass nowhere the midwestern US, but I've been all over the country and to Canada, the United Kingdom, and France.

As for my hobbies (besides learning languages) I'm a huge reptile freak. I own one bearded dragon at the moment, but I babysit two others from time to time, and have my eye on a ball python.

And that concludes my awkward introduction. As for what I want in my scrapbook, feel free to post whatever you'd like here. I'll be doing the same. There are no rules, other than a request to please try to be open-minded.

[Sayana]

Of all the snakes (and I mean all) to have as a pet, I think ball pythons are probably the best. They are awesome and cuddly and slow and don't get too big. Baby boa constrictors are also pretty awesome, but then they grow up and you need a big cage for them. Cornsnakes being another good choice. Prettier, and quicker, but less cuddly.

I just felt very inclined to post my thoughts on snakes Also, thanks for stepping up as an AS. I didn't quite get to giving you a big kudos

Credit: Shimoje

[Languish]

Ah, the joys of being a teenager. You're tired. You're frustrated with classes. You're confused about everything new in your life. You accidentally put dish soap in the dishwasher.

And by you, I mean me.

Yep. Everyone has to do it at least once. Glad I got mine over with because it was a pain in the ass. I caught it early, so no water damage to the floors or anything, but I was still rather panicked.

Salt and vinegar work wonders.

Obligatory picture from after the 2nd clean-up.

[Languish]

Surrealist Prose

I've decided to do a few segments about writing styles and movements in order to better seek out my own styles. The first is dear to my own heart as a primary horror writer- Surrealism. I'll start with a sample of my own writing (attempts) at the style, then move on to an explanation, professional examples, and then personal opinion. Feel free to share your own feelings, works, or requests for future analysis.

I'm going to focus on movements that included writing, since that's my goal here. I am not ignoring the fact that Surrealism (and many other movements) also held a place in visual art and music, that is simply not of interest in this situation.

---
The Morning
Early in the morning, the sun rises. It stretches across the sky, the rays yawning wide. As they yawn, the mouths open, revealing the inner maw.

The rays are lined with, not rows of teeth, but absolute emptiness. The void stares at the world momentarily in its freedom, gazing over the expanse it owns. It watches its people, flitting from place to place, racing after meaningless chores. It watches the ground and ocean buck and push at one another. It settles their arguments quietly, calming them like children in a tantrum. It watches the sky around it, reveling in the light it will bestow and the clouds which dwell within it.

Once satisfied with its domain's state, the rays close their massive jaw and the sun continues to rise beyond its yawn. The world is allowed to resume its awaking.

But make no mistake; it is watching still.

---

Surrealism is one of my favorite movements of art, and yet, it is also one of the hardest for me to put into words my love.

There are an array of definitions for Surrealism, ranging from a simple "showing of the impossible", to the creative movement which allowed the unconscious mind to express.

My personal favorite definition includes quite a longer explanation:

"A literary and artistic movement of the 1900s that attempts to express the workings of the subconscious and is characterized by fantastic imagery and incongruous juxtaposition of subject matter." - Free Dictionary

Surrealism is achieved by using symbolism as in the subconscious, latent content of dreams, and a stark contrast between what is supposed to be "real" and "fake". Often in Surrealist art, despite its obvious devisions, it is difficult to tell where these "real" and "fake" divide, which causes another layer of almost uneasiness and removal that is characteristic of dreams. It is a normal setting being altered.

Broken down, what this means is that the art attempts to reach a primitive state of understanding. Reading or viewing surrealist art often feels as though you're getting it, but you're not sure what it is that you're getting.

Professional examples may include André Breton's works such as The Magnetic Fields [1946], Marchel Duchamp's Green Box [1968], and John Allen's Nouveau's Midnight Sun: Transcriptions From Golgonooza and Beyond [2014].

Personally, Surrealism is an art form that I enjoy greatly, and wish I understood more of. Sadly, I don't think I'm supposed to understand any deeper, running the risk of ruining the entire feel.

At its best, Surrealism is an effort to unearth the unconscious mind and set free our own desires which are left unexpressed. At worst, you can blame that time you were hopped up on cold medicine as a form of art. Really, it's a win-win.

[Languish]

Japanese Poetry

We had to do a sample of Haikus, Tankas, and Chokas for my creative writing class, and thought you guys might enjoy. Being way too enthusiastic about Japanese literature, I'm a little miffed that they made us count syllables and didn't even mention the traditional Moraes form, but I understand the difficulties there. Anyway, here you go. The first three are Haikus (5-7-5, nature-based), then two Tankas (5-7-5-7-7, given topic), then two Chokas (5-7-7-5-7-5-7-7, love poems).

Renewal
Spring emerges now
With it comes a certain hope
Life always returns


Woodland Deer
In mud they leave prints
Hooves stop at nothing on Earth
The herd perseveres

Sunrise
Light peeks over hills
Animals come out to play
Awoken from sleep

Fortune Telling
In the flame I see
A secret of my future
I am reassured
Even though I don’t know how
I am to continue on

Friendship
In the light you shine
In darkness you are brighter
It helps me see past
The hopelessness and sadness
If only you could see too

Kittens
The way your fur knots
The way your meow wakes me up
Even when I’m not ready
The claws in my thigh
The kitty butt in my face
When you catch houseplants
Or you bring unwanted prey
All of it is endearing

Solitude
Echoes bounce off walls
My lone voice shouts back at me
I wish not to hear others
With a book or ten
An afternoon passes by
It is fine to be
Alone with my thoughts inside
Love for solidarity

[Languish]

Vent warning:Tl;dr underlined at the bottom for those who just want to know how it'll affect my Miz life. If you don't want to hear it, don't read. I won't be offended. I will be offended if you come into my own scrapbook and yell at me. Kind words are appreciated. Assholes are not.

So I'm still living at home. I just turned 18 a little less than a year ago, and living on my own isn't really realistic at this point. As a student, I'm pretty dependent on my parents. I have a part-time job, but I'm saving the vast majority of that income for college. Both my parents work, but my mom is a teacher's aide and makes approximately zilch.

Knowing all this, my father just decided to quit his job because he was "bored of itTo be fair, my father was a software engineer, and that's the most boring shit I've ever seen in my life. But he picked it, so I don't feel sorry for him".

So that leaves our household income at maaaybe 20k a year, if we push it, for four people. Yes, people have done it before. People have made it through with a lot less, even! We could survive. Maybe I'm being whiney and entitled.

But living in a house we don't yet own, driving two cars which require insurance and loan payments, and owning three pets that we bought under 5 times that income makes it far less realistic to maintain our current circumstances, let alone with one member of the household getting ready to go to college. Not to mention our medications (since my father and myself require them), and the fact that my brother already got set up to have braces put in.

So what am I supposed to do?

I offered to pay for part of the food out of my money. That's an essential part, and a part that I could help cut corners and clip coupons on. But I was told not to- even yelled at when I did- because I'm supposed to be saving that money. Unfortunately, that means we have no food.

When I say no food, I'm not talking "nothing that'll take less than 10 seconds to cook". I mean no bread, no eggs, no cheese, no flour. We have a few things in the cupboard, but honestly, show me a recipe that's just fucking milk and Peanut butterShit, that sounds kinda good if you could mix some melted chocolate. Hmm....

I approached my father about whether or not he was looking for a job, and he told me that he was looking into starting his own business.

Ah yes, at the ripe age of 55, with at bare minimum two dependents, it is time to start a business.

It irritates me that I'm expected to sit back complacently while daddy dearest bullshits around. It irritates me that, knowing he was (basically) our only source of income, he still felt like he could quit whenever he felt like it. It irritates me that he doesn't consider what will happen when he does anything.

Alright. Rant over. Here's the relevant part.

With all the stress and shit going on, I don't know how present I'll be over the next week or so. I'll try my best, and since Mizahar is a good stress reliever,
I might be on even more, but we'll have to wait and see. Things might be touch and go for awhile, or you may be seeing my face avatar a lot more. Who knows.

~Languish out~

[Languish]

I've already had several people reach out with suggestions and support, and I just wanted to say I really appreciate it.

I honestly wasn't sure how many people would even read my rambling, let alone respond, so it was surprising in the best way.

You're all very kind, and I do feel much better now after having gotten a large portion of the shit off my chest. It'll still be rocky going forward, but I feel like I can tackle it now.
Thanks,
- Languish

[Languish]

"- and as much time as they save- us they are not at all discriminating."

This textbook is so boring that even the editors gave up on chapter two. How does shit like this get through? This is the 10th edition, and they still couldn't catch something that impedes comprehension?

Man, that bugs me so much. I might have to take a pen to that....

[Languish]

Just wanted to let everyone know that, despite life beating my ass the past week or so, I'm absolutely still alive and kicking.

Tonight and tomorrow are my Miz days this week, so if I've overlooked anything by Friday, please go ahead and poke me again. My PM box is a little chaotic right now, and I'm afraid I might've lost a few things.

Love is coming to my city, I promise.

[Azmere]

Love is coming to my city, I promise.

Isn't necrophilia frowned upon?