19th Fall, 516 AV
Speech
Others
Speech
Others
The edict yesterday had been that the Winter was to be a harsh one. Of all the things Haena wanted to hear, it wasn't that. Since the news had filtered through the tents and pavilions that made up Endrykas, the Horserun women had been on edge. The children had picked up on it, the animals to some extent too, Alta' twitching her ears as she did when she was nervous about something.
Even Epaiza seemed effected. She was here now, drinking from her waterskin as the two women sat opposite each other, building up the fire. Haena was watching her through half-closed lids. Her sister's*Haena sometimes calls Epaiza her sister even though she is her sister-in-law. hands were fumbling with the kindling, messing with a loose bit of moss that she held like a baby bird in her cupped hands.
"It'll be okay, Ep. We'll get through this." They were the first words she'd spoken to her sister all day. Life was quiet since the news of Eikre's death, a camp that had once been full of cheer and laughter and song now was filled only with silences and the noises of survival. Epaiza looked up, the moss laying stlil in her hands.
"Will we?" Haena nodded hesitantly, but she wasn't sure herself. "I'm sure we'll pull through. Winter might be difficult, but we'll sell Rolen's dog for a start. Their striders we can... we can figure something out with them. Food we can buy, and we can hunt a bit ourselves. I just need your help, Ep. I can't do it, not easily. And you're so much better at all this." She gestured at their camp, their home. But it was the wrong thing to say.
The other woman looked about, and Haena knew she was looking for the children. Epaiza was a highly protective person, Haena had come to notice. She sheltered the children from her tears and from the troubles they were in. She didn't know if that was entirely a good thing, but she knew Tomas and Julai were much more aware of what was going on that she gave them credit for. They were nowhere to be seen however, and Epaiza almost visibly blew out a sigh of relief. Then Haena watched the emotions cloud her face like a storm blowing across the steppes. The next thing, her fists were clenched and she stared at Haena, eyes teared with desperation and worry. "You need my help? Did you ever stop to think that I need your help?"
"Did it never occur to you that I'm struggling just as much as you. No, perhaps even more so? That I have to work so hard to make sure we get by, when before there were tasks that he could do and I didn't have to know how to do this, that... anything."
There was a silence as her words sunk in, because it was true, everything she said. Haena hadn't thought about the burdens that Epaiza carried. She had thought about the family as a whole, about what they might do. She had considered things, the selling of animals, the difficulties of Winter and what they might do. She had ticked over all of them and automatically assumed Ep would be alright with it all. Yet she had forgotten to ask her. Haena was a headstrong woman, but now she felt ashamed. Guilt churned uncomfortably in her stomach and she stumbled over her words, tongue feeling leaden.
"Epaiza, I... I don't know what to say."
Her sister leaned forward, hands pressed to the dirt as she gazed into Haena's eyes. She looked away, at the tent flapping in the breeze, at the green beetle crawling slowly across the fabric. Anywhere but at Epaiza. "Tell me you'll help me?"
