[Prismatic Petals] A Tribute

by **Martini Elwood** on October 7th, 2018, 7:46 pm

10th of Autumn, 518AV
13th Bell, 30th Chime

Wandering was something of a rewarding habit. Often times Martini's legs moved on their own while her mind was occupied, and she ended up in various inspiring places and situations, but not all of them were exactly pleasant. She wound up in strange places as well, a few times she'd wandered around Riverfall had landed her outside the safety of the city. Like that time in when she almost - she paused as she looked up at the person she'd walked in to. "Lost in thought there?"

"Oh, uhm, yes. Sorry about that..." The brunette looked aside to keep her clear embarrassment from view. It wasn't the first time and most likely it wouldn't be the last, but it never stopped amazing her how lost in thoughts she could get. The other woman nodded in understanding, but waved before getting back to work watering the eye popping view of flowers arranged in front of the building. "Uhm, excuse me..?"

"Need something?" The woman chirped from her position over the flower pot. She turned and smiled at Martini, a blinding smile that could rival even Syna's light.

"Are these all yours? They're gorgeous!" Martini marveled at the sheer amount of lush plants and their shine. They all seemed so healthy and... full! They were really pretty, and it made her wonder how long it took to amass them all. The other woman smiled proudly and inclined her head. She seemed to enjoy Martini's childlike amusement and wonder.

"Yep, my wife and I grew 'em all. Pretty little things, meanings everywhere."

"Meanings?" Truthfully Martini hadn't the faintest clue what she meant as the woman walked closer. She gestured for Martini to follow her, to which the brunette did immediately. Once inside she was met with a quaint little shop set up. To her left there was a simple counter with yet another woman behind it. She seemed to sit lowly before straightening as Martini and the second woman entered.

"Every flower has a meaning, some good some bad. Colors change the tone of the meaning, but most flowers symbolize something - no matter how small. For example, Snowdrop," she began, leading Martini deeper into the shop where a small vibrant plant, white in color, bent toward the ground. "Can mean hope or purity. While it only comes in white, I believe if it came in black the meaning would become more negative, as black is usually the symbol of death or darkness."

"So you could say flowers have a.. language, so to speak..?" Martini asked curiously. The woman had sparked her interest, flowers having meanings? Odd. Assuming their was a meaning to every flower, she briefly wondered if she'd ever sent the wrong message to someone given her spur of the moment choices. The other woman nodded at her question, to which Martini moved to her next one. "Do you have any for... hurt?"

by **Martini Elwood** on October 7th, 2018, 11:22 pm

Martini regretted her choice instantly, her emotions having gotten to her mouth before her filter could. She was... sad, still. It had taken her little effort to place the words out there for others to hear, but she wasn't sure if she had spoken herself. The woman parroted her curiously, her eyes searching for the why in Martini's. She couldn't bare to say it again, so she simply nodded as her voice surely would have failed.

"Well, it depends on what kind of light you want to shed it in. Did you want a calm undertone? Sad? Colors can change things like that you see.” Martini didn’t have the guts to explain this did she? No, she’d said and she’d stay behind it. She avoided the woman's gaze, instead lowering hers to the floor. She simply didn’t know how to answer. If flowers had meanings, no, rather if flowers symbolized anything, then the color told you whether the light it was said in was dark or bright. Regardless of what Martini had thought she spoke anyway.

“Something… calming. Like, I know I lost someone but it’s only a step I need to get over.” Her words were slow and full of thought, and she couldn’t help looking up to gauge the reaction of the woman before her. Looking back, she shared a look with what Martini assumed was her wife before nodding to herself.

“I have the perfect flower in mind, Miss..?”

“Oh, I’m Martini. You are?” Martini tried on a small smile, but it was just crooked with the sadness and the familiar weight she felt on her shoulders. The woman introduced herself as Noemi, and her wife as Adie. Martini almost tripped a few times as she was lead to the right most wall of the shop, where a shelf of seeds where laying. Noemi inspected each package before she seemed to get what she wanted, a look of sudden recognition on her features. Martini was grateful they didn’t question her as their eyes did, but she was curious as to what the woman was handling.

“These,” Noemi began, a small smile on her lips as she gestured to her open palm. “Are Hyacinth seeds. We don’t currently have any bloomers yet, just seeds I’m afraid. But if you’d like I could sell you some and you could grow them?”

“What are they like?” Martini inquired, her hands going to the packet that held the five seeds inside. They almost looked like onions - roughly the size of a grape with layers of skin that were peeling slightly. They had a dark, purple like coloring and as Martini took the seeds into her hand she could feel that they were hard. She handed the packet back, as not to seem to interested. She was.

“They’re really beautiful flowers that bloom like bushes, each bud on the stem will grow into a small flower. They bud really close, almost as if boding together and they come in an array of colors. They usually don’t bloom into the color of the plant they seeded from, but it does happen on rare occasion. They’re very rare hear, I think this is our last pack.”

Martini listened intently to Noemi’s explanation, nodding every so often to show she was listening. She briefly wondered what she meant by blooming like bushes, but Noemi assured her the flowers didn’t grow large. “They normally grow around eighteen inches tall, no more than nine wide.”

“And what do they… mean?” Martini was hesitant to ask, mainly do to her earlier statement. The flower itself sounded so beautiful, but if it meant loss could she truly take it home? And Noemi hadn’t mentioned colors. She didn’t think she’d take the seeds either way. A flower to remind her of her parents? No, she couldn’t possibly. It was almost unthinkable.

by **Martini Elwood** on October 7th, 2018, 11:23 pm

“They symbolize grief. And sadness. The colors are somewhat random, but I can tell you some common one… Red, Pink, white, purple, and blue are what I’ve seen.” Noemi put a finger to her chin as she spoke, thinking back to any other colors she might have seen. Hands back at her side, she spoke once more. “As before white symbolizes purity, but red can be a more passionate type. Pink is often for gentle love, and blue represents calmness or sympathy. I can show you how to plant them if you’d like to buy..?”

“W-well…” If worse came to worse she could always give them to someone else, but she knew that if she took these seeds home she would be reminded every time she looked at them. Could she bare that? That unbelievable weight that would be on her shoulders twenty-four seven as she lived her daily life? When she thought about it she already was. She had run away from it so many times because it had been so painful. Maybe she just needed something extra to take care of, since she wasn’t taking care of herself.

“If it wouldn’t be to much trouble.” Martini resolved to face her problems, this was another step she could take. Noemi nodded excitedly, immediately leading her to the tools section where she grabbed a few things as she listed them off. A rake and a shovel, the seeds, and a medium sized flower pot with some soil. Noemi guided Martini around the the floor plan, careful to instruct her so that she wouldn’t trip over anything. The brunette watched as Noemi expertly handled all the objects in her arms while keeping her balance somehow. Finally they stopped back at the entrance to the shop where Noemi placed everything on the ground and got on her knees, gesturing for Martini to do the same. When she had placed herself on her knees, Noemi began to instruct her.

“Now, fist place the bulb so that pointed edge is facing upwards. This is important because the flower has to bloom from the seed, and if you put it in upside down it’ll simply die, understand?” Martini nodded and flipped the seed handed to her over so it was in the right position. “Now, plant it a few inches down, not too far though. I’d say four or five inches is a good depth. Got to make sure the plant will have space to put out it’s roots and such.”

“Okay, like this..?” Martini took the shovel that was handed to her and dug into the soil, making an adequate hole before placing the bulb pointy side up and turning to Noemi who nodded her approval. She mimicked Noemi as she gently patted soil. Martini patted it a bit harder, to which the black haired woman stopped her. So it has to remain loose so water an roots can break through, then? Martini nodded and loosened the soiled by kneading it with her fingers. Working with he her hands always put her at ease.

“Now you just need to water and let it absorb Syna’s light regularly. Oh, but if you water it too much you’ll kill the plant. Only water it enough to dampen the soil. Compost is a helpful component to the process as well, things like dead leaves and such can be put in the soil to make it more healthy for the plant.” Noemi gestured animatedly with her hands as she spoke, seemingly excited to pass on her knowledge. She gestured to the other three seeds, and told martini to try without mimicking her. “You try.”

“A-alright.” Martini took the small garden shovel from Noemi and dug three more wholes in the soil. Noemi shook her head and told her that she needed to space them out or the plants would basically steal from each other and die. Apparently the only food they needed came from their roots, Syna’s light, and water. Technically they made their own. Once Martini had gauged proper spacing, she had three holes approved in no time. With each bulb pointy side up in their respective hole, Martini recovered them and patted down the soil gently. “Is this okay?”

“Perfect, you’ve done perfect. Would you like to by the tools and the seeding pot?” Martini nodded, and they moved to the counter where Adie was waiting. She asked her if that was all she wanted, before adding up the numbers. “You’re at ten kina and six topaz kina. Is that okay?”

“Yes, that’s fine.” Martini haded over the kina from her backpack, careful not to drop anything and turned back to the flower pot. She turned back to the couple as they looked on at her, expecting her to say something. “Thank you, is there anything else I should know?”

Adie looked to Noemi, who paused to think before shaking her head. Nothing came to mind so she left it at that. Martini nodded and attempted to collect everything. She placed the shovel inside the pot with the seeds and lifted the flower pot. It was moderately heavy, and her arms shook slightly with the weight of it. She smiled tensely, and thanked the couple one last time before she headed back out to her apartment.

Spent9ki 6tk
Seeds, Rare approved by Lumi 5ki
Medium Pot, 6 tk
Shovel 2ki
Spade 2ki

by **Martini Elwood** on October 7th, 2018, 11:24 pm

She huffed her exhaustion as she unlocked her door the potted plant next to her on the ground. Her arms were so tired… She’d stopped so many times on the way to rest her arms it wasn’t funny. She wasn’t used to lifting heavy objects, and the weight of the soil didn’t help. Noemi had said not to water it until she had made it hoe because water would only increase the weight of it. So of course after lifting it she’d followed the older woman’s advice. One she was done, she placed it off the side of the wall near the couch.

She sat on the bed for a moment, just looking over at the pot. It was an odd sensation. Commemorating her parents passing by buying a potted plant. It wasn’t a bad feeling, no, she just wanted something to remember them with other than a toolkit she supposed. It wasn’t much, but it would grow with her feelings as she sorted them out. What was she saying? Shed never been one to face her problems head on, she’d always ran away. But she supposed she could have faced it ages ago if shed just had the courage.

Truthfully, she wasn’t sure about anything anymore. She could barely stand the feeling of loss sometimes, and other times she didn’t even know it existed. Sometimes she could forget, sometimes she couldn’t. It came as a shock to her when it just suddenly floated in her mind and she was met with the weight of what had happened once again. Hadn’t she mourned long enough?

Yes, she had. She needed to begin her life again, so as to move forward not stay stagnant like she had been all this time. It was a miracle she was living, all the pent up feelings locked in her heart could be suffocating at times. How could she possibly hope to rid herself of that when it had so obviously become a part of her? Her grieving self was more her than her happy, composed self.

Now that she thought on it that grief was what had brought her so far in her career. Art was a lifestyle in itself, and a skill. She was so scared that in letting go she was doing a disservice to her deceased parents she hung on to any part that vaguely seemed pertinent. Such as why her father went back into the storm - what could have been so important?

For a bit after her mothers death she blamed her father. No matter how much she had thought about it if her dad hadn’t died her mother would still be here. But then, it felt wrong. Her father was a man of purpose, he’d never leave them unless he had good reason… He’d had one, she knew he did. And so she just clung to the fact that she was missing something important, something her dad was willing to die for. She would eventually go back, when her courage wand mind was set.

She just needed… time. Right, because she hadn’t had plenty to change her mind and go back to home. The most decent thing that could be done, the most restoring, would be to go back. But being the coward she was she couldn’t even do that. How many years had passed? How many times had she thought about the urge to go home? Plenty was the answer to each. She just couldn’t. Her home, her possessions all but what was on her back that day… it was all gone, destroyed in a maze of fire and debris. No amount of rebuilding could salvage what she had lost, both in the familial and the material sense. Her family, her home… nothing could replace either, and no amount of running away could change that, it seemed.

by **Martini Elwood** on October 7th, 2018, 11:25 pm

Something slid down her cheek as she thought on. Again and again, tear after tear she cried until she couldn’t take it an openly sobbed. She wanted to see her mother and father, she wanted to go home. Home was so complex, but wouldn’t it be where her parents were? Could she truly kill herself just to be with her family? No, she couldn’t. Even now her cowardice prevented her from being with them, because deep down… She wanted to live more than she wanted to see them. She couldn’t let her story end like that. She could never greet them with a smile if she simply took her life now. She couldn’t find it in herself to just die, to take her life and see them instantly. And that hurt too.

What would they think of her? Dying with so much left to live for? Who would draw the world if not her? Who would make the Elwood name grand if not her? None could do it other than herself after all. Could she take her life knowing that? No, of course she couldn’t. If she did, she’d have no place in their arms. She vowed some odd season after her mothers passing she would raise her name to the great beyond, so that she could make them proud. And that thought somehow brought a small comfort to her dreary outlook. She could die in peace once she’d mastered all there was to know about art.

Her life was a straightforward one; live so that the Elwood name is never forgotten. If she could do that, perhaps along the way she could find happiness in the world, even without them in - no, such a thought only made her that much ore sad. It hurt to think of it like that, moving on seemed so wrong to her. She had lost, and that loss had drowned out any happiness she could have even now.

The brunette sighed as she wiped her eyes. She was so tired of crying, of feeling like nothing could go right. And it wasn’t she didn’t try to find happiness. It hurt and it wasn’t pleasant. She hated the thought of feeling like this for the remainder of her life. She just wanted to be free of all the thoughts that plagued her.

Hah, what she wouldn’t give for that. These experiences may have shaped her, but that didn’t mean she wouldn’t like to forget some of them. Having met someone who had memory loss, their talk hadn’t been long. But the mere fact that he had been so broken over it… she couldn’t understand it. Sure, not remembering her family would be hard, but not remembering the hardships too add to that- would that make up for it? Possibly, possibly not. She’d never know. Remembering was hard on her either way.

Looking over at her recent purchase, she reminded herself that not everything was tied to her parents. She could possibly live through the pain, she could disconnect. Would she be herself if she ever did that? No, she wouldn’t.

The plant would grow with her feelings and so too would her resolve and her dreams. Seasons change, much like people and interests. There was nothing she could do about that. Having observed herself time and time again, the only thing she was certain there was nothing that could possibly appease her mind, and even sleep was something to be feared in her life.

Being plagued by nightmares of the storms, dreaming of and magic easel… so amny unchangable and uncontrollable things in her life time wasn’t good for her. Often she felt the need to just work without sleep or wander the nighttime city in Riverfall. She hadn’t had a chance to do so in Lhavit, but she would surely have days when she would. It was only a matter of time. What could she possibly hope to do to change her situation? Nothing, that’s what.

Martini sighed for what seemed like the umpteenth time. She let herself fall back on her bed. Someday she would be okay, but that day just seemed so far away that hope was fleeting. She wanted nothing more than to grasp the happier feelings and scarf down all the goodness in the world… It was pointless to though, for things she couldn’t change shouldn’t be on her mind in the first place. She was work oriented to the bone, so she didn’t have time for such nonsense.

Martini scoffed, nonsense? Of course it was. But had she the right to say so when this nonsense kept her up at night? No. What right did she have besides to grieve and wallow in said grief. None, that’s what. She simply needed to face the reality and call it quits. Surely she could make better use of her time elsewhere?

“Oh right, water.” She aimlessly sat up and reached for the water skin beside her. She needed to water the new plant. She got up, water skin in hand and moved to the plant. She moved to our the skin, mindlessly watching as the soil dampened. She stopped and dropped the water skin, and her body to it’s knees as she observed the soil soak in the moisture. This would be her effort at changing, this would be her tribute and her step forward. This plant was her first step.