“Hauk, it’s not. It can’t be.”
She couldn’t believe that after hearing all of that, the hunter was worried about a trap, of all things. Rohka had been ready to walk right through any portal the Voice opened up, absolutely, and immediately, for reasons she knew she would soon list.
“Why would the Voice lead us into danger?” Rohka stood up now, hands on her hips, the volume of her voice rising while facing more towards her friend—a man that she knew would be able to take her sudden outpouring of emotion. “She said she needs us, that she wants to bring life to as much of the link as possible. Does it really matter what’s on the other side? Surely The Voice wouldn’t tell us about this shrine if she thought we couldn’t handle whatever is over there. Gods, Hauk, your wish to be prepared for the worst is completely logical, but is that really the first thing you had to ask about? Aren’t you…”
Her voice trailed off, beginning to rethink and reel inwards when she started to take note of the very real journey this would become, if she agreed to help.
And that was when she thought of Shiress.
When the physician had asked for what they would receive in return for their aid, Rohka’s heart began to race. It was certainly a question that had crossed her own mind, and she’d left it alone, in the dark, unwilling to seek compensation from a very real source of blessed divinity who had already treated the sybil with such care. In fact, The Voice treated everyone with care. Every question was answered so thoroughly with equal attention and grace. Roh noticed how she’d spoken of Myleena, which answered Sevris, and how she spoke of their connection, in answer to Hollis, and even how she spoke of the shrine’s defences, in answer to Orias. Thinking of this care was what spurred on a memory, and Rohka knew what she needed to say next.
“Hauk, I’m not going to be the one to convince you. I won’t try to convince anyone here,” she looked into the silent eyes of Caspian for a long tick, and then into those of Shiress. Caspian, the enigma she longed to convinnce of what could only be seen as impossible between them. Shiress, the darling with a depth that the sybil dared not reach, in fear of surfacing the pains they both could not bear. Rohka turned to stand facing The Voice—the beauty who sat in the pews with them. The only one who shared so much of her own story with them.
Roh clasped her hands together and placed them against her chest, closing her eyes, trying to still her beating heart to no avail. It would be obvious to anyone watching her that she was shaking yet again—whether that was in fear, or nerves, or excitement, would be for the observer to guess—but for Rohka, it was her drive to speak her mind. The same drive that made her move into the city. The same drive that asked for her own table at the Malt House.
The very same drive that needed her life to change.
“I only want to convince you, The Voice, that I want my life to become my own.”
It was this piece of knowledge that Rohka picked up on at once, when the divine woman explained that the shrines were places where people would go to understand the darker aspects of life and learn how to survive them, understand them and even control them. This fascinated her, along with The Voice’s own story of how she came to be. Of how Rhysol had kept her safe and taught her to develop her inner strengths—the strength to build greatness with the badness of life. Rohka admired this trait as soon as The Voice spoke of it. She was in awe of The Voice’s actions and supportive of the desire to reconstruct the ability to share information and resources. There was nothing about this story that caused her to worry about the woman’s intentions.
The Voice cared. She cared as much as Rhysol did, for all of them.
Rohka opened her eyes and directed her attention solely to the blank white gaze before her. “Earlier you asked about what our families were like. What I failed to mention is that they’re downright suffocating. I understand them, ma’am, I really think I do, but I struggle to become what they expect of me. I doibt that I've felt anything close to the abuses you've suffered. But I feel as though I've experienced some of it, at least mentally. I'm almost sure that I've blocked most of it out of my mind. Even this ring, gods,” she looked at it and grinned, anguish written across the angles in her features. “If my family knew that it was made from your hair, they’d find a way to make me give it back, if not get rid of it. They’ve always hated having hair lying around in the house. When I was young, I thought it was just because they wanted to keep a clean household. I grew up hearing them speak of fallen hair being the cause of familial quarrels, or of hair being used for curses from strands that fell into the wrong hands, or souls being locked into oblivion using hair cut off by mages of enemies. They would be so worried for me, and I know I’d need to fight hard against them to make them understand that this was simply a gift. That I’d gained your favour.
“Sometimes I really wonder about their trust in you—in The Voice of Rhysol, versus Rhysol himself. They rarely spoke about you, or of the Voice before you. Which makes sense, given that she ruled with fear and intimidation. My mother was born here in Ravok, but my father was born in Zeltiva, where he’d met my mother when she studied at the University. We’re all devoted to Rhysol, and I know this. But my mother and father have just been wanting to make the best living that they can on the lakeshore as the Calicos. Recently though, I think there’s more to it. When you spoke of the northern reaches of Taldera, isn’t that where Avanthal is? Isn’t that where the Vantha live? The children of Morwen? The children being hunted to bring Morwen back?”
Rohka paused here. She felt out of breath, her voice having risen multiple octaves in her wish to understand while fearing the eventual response. The sybil was never skilled with being clear and direct with her words. She took a moment to try and centre herself again. She closed her eyes. The words she spoke next were softer, measured, and careful.
“Hauk’s fear of a trap, in that case, makes sense to me. I just don’t think you would be so careless." Rohka brought her hands to the medallion around her neck and slowly faced it towards the pews. She held the small mirror and knew that there would be a way to clear her doubts and the doubts of others. "You care about these shrines, just as much as the Caretakers did, yes? If what you say is true, and if I do have the essence of a Caretaker within me, I would like to know how I can help.
“And whether I can help myself through this endeavour, too.”
The sybil held the mirror in direct view of The Voice and mentally voiced the phrase needed to activate the medallion:
Let me know thy heart.